The Tick (TV Series)
The Funeral (2001)
Patrick Warburton: The Tick
Photos
Quotes
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The Tick : [first lines - giving a eulogy] Death. The eternal blink. The capricious dance of Now Ya Stop Movin' Forever. Well contrary to popular belief, death isn't just for dead people. It can happen to anyone. I know, it's news to me too. And it's not just people either, it's all kinds of stuff. Horses, fiddler crabs. Did you know that even a potato... can die?
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The Tick : [continuation of eulogy] Well just for kicks, let's look at the word funeral for a moment. Starts with the word fun, doesn't it? Now all I see out there are a bunch of sad faces. Well the Grim Reaper is an ugly customer. I'll Grant ya that, but ya know who's worse? It's Mr. Mope. I'm sayin' to you, watch out folks. Cause old Mr. Mope's gotcha all wrapped up in a wet blanket of his moping.
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The Tick : [continuation of eulogy - last lines] I believe we're all gathered here today to say goodbye to our dead friend The Immortal. Let's do that, shall we?
[waves like a small child]
The Tick : Bye Morty.
[grimaces all around the room]
The Tick : Hey now no one's sayin' that death isn't sad. But it's also the Mount Everest of life. Well I say when your time comes, climb it. Who knows what wonders may lie at the icy summit of Death Mountain. Might be nice up there. And think of all the people that have gone before ya. You may get to shake hands with the greatest minds in human history... But again, maybe death is nature's way of saying, try again.
[thunderous applause]
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The Tick : Squeeze the milk of life into your dirty glass, and drink it warm!
