Kevin Connolly: Ryan Malloy

Quotes 

• Tiffany Malloy : [to a glum-looking group of girls]  Did you hear? The Halloween Hair Hacker is still on the loose.

  [on closer inspection, they all have very bad haircuts] 

  Tiffany Malloy : Sorry.

  [tiptoes away] 

  Amber Moss : Forget about the Halloween Hair Hacker. There's gonna be an eclipse in a few minutes.

  [everything goes dark, screams ring out, and when visibility returns, Amber is shielding her hair with a textbook and Tiffany is still swinging her handbag defensively over her crowning glory] 

  Sable O'Brien : [Ryan is clutching her]  Get off me!

  Ryan Malloy : [stroking her long blond hair]  But I'm protecting you! Yet, it's odd, it feels so... so safe and warm.

  [he is sitting on her lap, and she dumps him contemptuously onto the floor] 

  Tiffany Malloy : Calm down, everybody, it was just the eclipse. Thank God it wasn't the maniac!

  Michelle : [comes running in]  Aah! Look what happened!

  [her hair has been slashed off] 

  Barry : [comes running in]  The cutter struck again! I'll fix it!

  [ushers the latest victim away] 

  Amber Moss : [meekly]  Who could be doing such a horrible thing?

  Tiffany Malloy : Oh my God. The Hair Hacker's got everyone but us. We're the only girls left with long hair.

  Sable O'Brien : Why's everyone looking at us?

  Tiffany Malloy : I guess somebody's gotta say it. The Halloween Hair Hacker must be one of us.

  Ryan Malloy : Yup. You're the only three that make any sense.

  [weird janitor behind him is pruning a mop with garden shears] 

• Michelle : [short hair]  Hey, Ryan, wanna dance?

  [obviously had to work up a lot of courage] 

  Ryan Malloy : Sorry, Sir, I don't dance with guys.

  [the girl runs off, shattered] 

• Sable O'Brien : Okay, Tiffany, you can come in now.

  Amber Moss : Even in dangerous times, she gets an entrance.

  [Tiffany enters, bare-shouldered sequined dress] 

  Amber Moss : Wow, you make a great Jessica Rabbit.

  Tiffany Malloy : Oh, thanks, but I'm not Jessica Rabbit. I couldn't find a red dress, so I'm Alice in Wonderland, all grown up. Ah, whom am I kidding, I'm nothing, I just love the way I look in this dress.

  Ryan Malloy : Oh yeah? And what did you bring the bunny for?

  Tiffany Malloy : Dad mumbled something about the bunny having his heart set on it, I don't know. I don't wanna upset him, he's got a lot of guns, you know.

  [little laugh] 

  Tiffany Malloy : I'm sorry it took me so long to get here, but it took me forever to dry my hair.

  [stirring up the feelings of loss amongst the wallflowers] 

  Tiffany Malloy : I'm sorry, I'm sorry, come on guys, let's dance.

• Sable O'Brien : [at Halloween party]  What are you dressed as?

  Ryan Malloy : [football outfit]  I'm Esmeralda's date. Half-back of Notre-Dame.

  Sable O'Brien : Isn't that the Hunchback of Notre-Dame?

  Ryan Malloy : [grinning]  You're beautiful, baby, but you don't know a darn thing about football.

• Tiffany Malloy : Hey, what's the matter, big brother?

  Ryan Malloy : I wanted to be a hero, and make some points with Sable. Instead, all I got was... dry cake and no milk.

  Tiffany Malloy : Come here, Fletch Face. I'll tell you what, you can still be a hero. Sable's trapped in my locker.

  [smiles] 

  Tiffany Malloy : Why don't you go let her out?

  Ryan Malloy : [grins at prospect, cake still stuck to his teeth, rushes over to locker, opens it]  All right, don't come out, the maniac's still on the loose

  Sable O'Brien : Oh Ryan! Hold me!

  [he doesn't need inviting twice, jumps in, closing the door behind him] 

• Amber Moss : [at the Halloween dance]  Wow, you make a great Jessica Rabbit.

  Tiffany Malloy : [showing lots of cleavage]  Oh, thanks, but I'm not Jessica Rabbit. I couldn't find the right dress, so I'm Alice in Wonderland, all grown up. Aw, whom am I kidding? I'm nothing, I just love the way I look in this dress.

  Ryan Malloy : [re Mr. Floppy draped over her arm]  Yeah? What did you bring the bunny for?

  Tiffany Malloy : Dad mumbled something about the bunny having his heart set on it, I don't know. I didn't want to upset him. He's got lots of guns, you know.