Whose Line Is It Anyway? (TV Series)

Show No. 414 (2001)

Ryan Stiles: Self

Photos 

Quotes 

• Drew Carey : [before "Hollywood Director"]  The scene is, Kathy is an impatient customer who pulls into Ryan's gas station, where he is pumping gas. Wayne is a THIEF, who has come to rob them.

  Wayne Brady : Why I gotta be the thief?

  [audience cheers; Wayne raises his right fist slightly] 

  Drew Carey : I think... y'know, maybe you should count your blessings. If this is NBC, you probably wouldn't even be ON this show.

  [audience oohs/laughs] 

  Drew Carey : Am I lyin'? If I'm lyin', call, call the cop- okay, go ahead.

  [chuckles] 

  Kathy Greenwood : [to Ryan]  I don't know WHY this is taking you so long.

  Ryan Stiles : Would you like me to fill 'er up?

  Kathy Greenwood : I've said "yes" to that question FIFTEEN TIMES!

  Ryan Stiles : How 'bout the CAR?

• Ryan Stiles : [in "Hollywood Director", the current style is insult comics]  Fill 'er up with ethyl? You don't look like Lucy. You know, I'm tellin' ya...

  Kathy Greenwood : [surly tone]  I don't know why this has to take so long.

  Ryan Stiles : Looks like you blew a tire, among other things. You know what I'm sayin'?

  Wayne Brady : [enters]  Click. Have you ever noticed that he looks like a giraffe with three legs missin'? That's what I'm sayin'! That's what I'm sayin'! You ever notice, you ever notice that they can't dance? They got no rhythm, they're talkin' 'bout like that...

  [laughs] 

  Wayne Brady : Thank you very much everybody, good night!

  Colin Mochrie : [enters]  Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut! No, no, no, no, no.

  Ryan Stiles : You're so negative!

  Colin Mochrie : Oh, it wasn't negative. You had the "insult" part down, the "comic" was GONE!

• Drew Carey : [after "Hollywood Director"] 

  [holding up a tape recorder, which he plays:] 

  Drew Carey : "One thousand points."

  Wayne Brady : What's that?

  Ryan Stiles : Your tricorder?

  Drew Carey : [plays it again]  "One thousand points."

  [whispering] 

  Drew Carey : I'm tryin' to work it out where I don't have to show up at ALL.

  [laughs] 

  Ryan Stiles : Damn close.

  Drew Carey : We're gonna miss you, Lewis.

• Kathy Greenwood : [in "Hollywood Director", the current style is Jerry Springer mixed with Tarzan] 

  [as Jane] 

  Kathy Greenwood : All right, I wanna know WHY this is taking SO long!

  Ryan Stiles : [as Tarzan]  Tarzan keep thinking of mother, who was sister. Tarzan no leave trailer. Tarzan no leave trailer to go to city.