- Ryan Stiles: [in "Greatest Hits", after the first song where Colin danced with Wayne in a "music video"] Wow. Is that the only shirt you have?
- Colin Mochrie: ...Why don't you talk for a while.
- Ryan Stiles: [laughs] Wow. Still tired, and they shot that two weeks ago.
- [Colin nods]
- Ryan Stiles: Huh. Well.
- [Wayne hands Colin a glass of water]
- Ryan Stiles: Are you all right? Let me feel your heart.
- [puts his right hand on Colin's chest]
- Ryan Stiles: Well! It's like a little gerbil bouncing off a wall in there! You should really know better than that.
- Greg Proops: [in "World's Worst" thing to say or do on your first day in prison] Uh, yes, I'll have the coq au vin, uh, with potatoes au gratin, and uh, a Chardonnay, I think, this evening.
- [looks down]
- Greg Proops: Ah, slop. Perfect.
- Colin Mochrie: [in "Scenes From a Hat", the suggestion is "If department store mannequins could talk"] Would it kill to add a little genitalia?
- Greg Proops: [in "World's Worst" thing to say or do on your first day in prison] Uh, no, Duke, I'm not familiar with the term "biatch".
- [pronounces it "bye-atch"]
- Drew Carey: That's right, the points are like the talent portion of the Miss United States Contest. Miss America contest. You know what I meant.