Whose Line Is It Anyway? (TV Series)

Show No. 604 (2003)

Ryan Stiles: Self

Photos 

Quotes 

• Wayne Brady : [in "Improbable Mission"] 

  [off-screen voice on tape] 

  Wayne Brady : You must go to the supermarket. There, you will shop for groceries. The Prime Minister of Eat-All-You-Can is starving. If you do not, he shall perish, and Sally Struthers will bring little kids to your door and make you feel very, very bad about yourself. This message will self-destruct in three, two...

  [Ryan mimes throwing the tape out the window] 

  Ryan Stiles : The President of Eat-All-You-Can. We've got a picture of him on our wall.

  [points at Drew] 

  Colin Mochrie : [after audience laughter]  You know what? He seems like a very- he seems like a very nice person, and probably very lovely to work for.

• Drew Carey : [in "Scenes from a Hat"]  "Things your waitress says to you that could be misconstrued as sexual."

  Wayne Brady : So who's got the big meat?

  [pointing around] 

  Colin Mochrie : The breasts are on special.

  Drew Carey : [buzzes to end the game; the performers return to their seats]  And who could forget the ever-popular "more cream in your coffee?"?

  Ryan Stiles : Oh! Or, uh, "fuck me"?

• Ryan Stiles : [in "Greatest Hits", about songs of pregnancy]  Come on, come on, let's go, let's go, let's go.

  Colin Mochrie : Hey Ryan, what ya doin'?

  Ryan Stiles : Well, my wife's delivering tonight, and we gotta get this commercial done.

  Colin Mochrie : Oh, well isn't that a coincidence! Because what we're selling here is, songs of pregnancy!

  Ryan Stiles : I know, I was kidding about my wife.

  Colin Mochrie : I know.

  Ryan Stiles : [morosely]  She won't come near me.

  Colin Mochrie : I know.

• Colin Mochrie : [in "Greatest Hits", about songs of pregnancy]  We've covered almost everyone. Oh no we haven't.

  Ryan Stiles : There's somethin' left?

  Colin Mochrie : There's MORE than something: There's KISS!

  [imitates KISS's tongue wagging] 

  Colin Mochrie : It always makes me gag when I try to do that.

  Ryan Stiles : [pointing at his teeth]  Parsley right there... you got a little bit...

  [Colin picks at his own teeth] 

  Ryan Stiles : You got it, you got it, you got it.

  Colin Mochrie : Okay. And who could forget that great KISS pregnancy song-

  [amused] 

  Colin Mochrie : it kinda linked in a way, aren't they?

  Ryan Stiles : [also amused]  It sure does! One leads to the other!

  Colin Mochrie : Yeah, I guess it does! YOU'LL find out...

  [Ryan looks downbeat]