"The Simpsons" Selma's Choice (TV Episode 1993) - Dan Castellaneta as Homer Simpson, Capt. Lance Murdock, Drunk Fish #1, Drunk Fish #2, Man at Funeral, Groundskeeper Willie, Squeaky-Voiced Teen, Hans Moleman, Hurray for Everything Member, Barney Gumble, Mitch, George Washington Robot

Lisa : Aunt Selma, this may be presumptuous, but have you ever considered artificial insemination?

Homer : Boy, I don't know. You'd have to be pretty desperate to make it with a robot.

[Marge whispers something in his ear]

Homer : I knew that.
Homer , Bart Simpson : [singing in the car] On top of spaghetti, all covered with cheese, I lost my poor meatball...

Marge : If you don't mind, we're on our way to a funeral!

Homer : [singing] Ding-dong, the witch is dead!

Bart Simpson : Which old witch?

Homer : The Wicked Witch!
[Homer has gotten food poisoning]

Marge : You look terrible.

Homer : I don't care. I'm going to Duff Gardens!

[he stands, then collapses and crawls out the door on his hand and knees. Cut to in the car, where he is shivering in the driver's seat, wrapped in a blanket]

Homer : So c-c-c-old...

Marge : Your lips are turning blue. I think you'd better stay home.

Homer : No! Duff Gardens... hurrah!

[he passes out and hits the steering wheel, blaring the horn]
Groundskeeper Willie : [after viewing Selma's video dating tape] Back in the loch with you, Nessie!
Selma Bouvier : [after Selma had a poor date with Hans, and visualizing ugly and blind children; disgusted by his grotesque lips] Yuck! Get outta my car.

[drives off without him]

Hans Moleman : This isn't my house.

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Capt. Lance Murdock, Drunk Fish #1, Drunk Fish #2, Man at Funeral, Groundskeeper Willie, Squeaky-Voiced Teen, Hans Moleman, Hurray for Everything Member, Barney Gumble, Mitch, George Washington Robot