- Dr. Forrester: Afternoon, Joel. Hello, robot super-pals. If you have a moment, and I assume you do, Frank and I would like to demonstrate an amazing new fitness product. It's called the Square Master. You see, the Square Master allows you to maximize your human potential because Square Master uses one of nature's most perfect shapes for your perfect shape. How does it work? Frank? Square Master allows you to utilize complicated principles of inertia and mass. Simply, efficiently, naturally. How? By using nature's perfectly-balanced muscle-resistant: gravity. That's right, for a beginning anaerobic workout, start with hands on the outside of the square. Then, when you're ready, go inside the square. Put your feet on the square. Sit on the square and simulate rowing. As your workout improves, you can link two squares together to form a rectangle. Now you're really working out. And for full aerobic conditioning, work on your Shemp area.
- [a close-up shot of the motorcycle]
- Crow T. Robot: Oh, so he's a Shriner. See? He's got a shotgun that shoots candy.
- Tom Servo: Have you ever worked with "Killdozer?"
- Mega-Weapon: Oh, don't ever mention his name! I'll tell you guys, he is one temperamental piece of machinery. I remember Clint Walker refused to run lines with him, and he drove off in a huff.
- [the hero kisses the heroine]
- Crow: Oh, just drape a piece of liver over her face; it'd have the same effect.
- Crow T. Robot: [Robert Ginty accidentally bumps a spider with his foot] Oh, great, now we gotta buy that one.