- Bruce Sato: Sometimes the eye does not behold the truth.
- Matt Trakker: I think I can still catch the curtain call.
- Miles Mayhem: This ancient map will lead us to the Gate of Darkness.
- Cliff Dagger: Hey, where'd you get that?
- Miles Mayhem: It was simple. I went to a gas station and I said: I'd like one map to the Gate of Darkness.
- Cliff Dagger: Really, how much did it cost?
- Miles Mayhem: You ignoramus! I stole it from a tribe in the Himalayas. Now lets go.
- Cliff Dagger: Hey! Who turned out the lights?
- Miles Mayhem: [over intercom] Your lights have been out since you were born, idiot!
- Matt Trakker: What's worrying me is I don't see any way into it.
- Bruce Sato: A house has many doors...
- Matt Trakker: Right, Bruce. We'd better analyse the entire structure on the computer.
- Alex Sector: Maybe we'll jolly well find a welcome mat, Matt.