The Office (TV Series)
A Benihana Christmas (2006)
John Krasinski: Jim Halpert
Photos
Quotes
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Dwight Schrute : Pam and Karen, I am ordering you to cease and desist all party planning immediately.
Pam Beesley : You can't do that.
Dwight Schrute : As ranking number three in this office, I am order...
Andy : [grunts] I'm number three.
Dwight Schrute : You're number four.
Andy : Yeah, but I'm number three.
Dwight Schrute : Uh, no.
[to Pam]
Dwight Schrute : You must turn over to me all Christmas decorations and party paraphernalia immediately. They will be returned to you on January 4th.
Jim Halpert : Okay, I think I can help here.
Dwight Schrute : Okay, good. They...
Jim Halpert : As ranking number two, I am starting a committee to determine the validity of the two committees, and I am the sole member of the committee. The committee will act on this now.
Dwight Schrute : Okay, this is stupid.
Jim Halpert : Could you please keep it down? I'm in session.
[long pause]
Jim Halpert : I have determined that this committee is valid.
Dwight Schrute : What? No! No! Wait! Wait, wait, wait.
[thinks about it]
Dwight Schrute : Permission to join the Validity Committee.
Jim Halpert : Permission denied.
Dwight Schrute : Damn it.
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Jim Halpert : You just had a rebound.
Michael Scott : I had a rebound.
Jim Halpert : Yeah. Which, don't get me wrong, can be a really fun distraction. But, when it's over, you're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart.
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Carol Stills : [shows Michael a framed photograph of her two kids, herself and a man on a ski trip. Michael had photoshopped his face in place of Carol's ex-husband's face] What is this?
Michael Scott : [laughing] That is my Christmas card. It's a picture of you and me and your kids on a ski trip, having a blast. "Ski-eason's Greetings."
Carol Stills : No. See, we never went on a ski trip.
Michael Scott : [holding back laughs] I know. I know.
Carol Stills : I went on a ski trip two years ago with my kids and my ex-husband.
Michael Scott : Right. Yes, but what you didn't realize at the time was that I was with you, in a sense, I was in your heart...
Carol Stills : [interrupts him] Michael...
Michael Scott : ...and next to your kids. What?
Carol Stills : This is so weird.
Michael Scott : I don't understand.
Jim Halpert : [to the camera] It's a bold move to photoshop yourself into a picture with your girlfriend and her kids on a ski trip with their real father. But then again, Michael's a bold guy. Is "bold" the right word?
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Michael Scott : [rides into office on very old and very used 10-speed bike and stops at Pam's desk] Hey! I would like a nice slice of Christmas Pam. Side of candy Pams. And perhaps some Pam chops... with mint.
Pam Beesly : Can I help you, Michael?
Michael Scott : I'm looking for the Toy Drive box.
Pam Beesly : It's behind you.
Michael Scott : [turns around to see Toy Drive pile full of brand-new, unopened toys. Leans his old bike against wall] Okay. Well, I need to put this bike in there. I hope it will fit, with all these little knickknacks.
Jim Halpert : Wow. What kind of bike is that?
Michael Scott : Um. I don't know. Average kind.
Kevin Malone : That tires look pretty worn.
Michael Scott : Well, that is probably from the test drive.
Jim Halpert : But the paint is chipping. Is that your old bike, Michael?
Michael Scott : No.
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Jim Halpert : What do we have here?
Dwight Schrute : What does it look like?
Jim Halpert : Dead goose.
Dwight Schrute : And circle gets the square.