- Oliver Wendell Douglas: When you first mentioned marriage to me, what did I tell you?
- Eb Dawson: You told me marriage was like living in a concentration camp.
- Lisa Douglas: Well!
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: I never said that!
- Eb Dawson: Yes, you did.
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: When?
- Eb Dawson: Right after you said, "If you're getting married for companionship, save your money. Buy a dog."
- Lisa Douglas: Well!
- Eb Dawson: [staggers outside from his first make-up lesson] Say, could somebody help me? I glued my eyes together.
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: You glued your -
- [notices Eb's blacked-out teeth]
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: Hey, what happened to your teeth?
- Eb Dawson: I put the mascara on in the wrong place.