- Jeff Coatsworth: Do you know what Kobe beef is?
- Marshall Eriksen: The most expensive beef in the world.
- Jeff Coatsworth: The place I'm taking you has Kobe lobster. That's lobster that is fed on Kobe beef.
- Lily Aldrin: Are you telling me that there are conventions for porn?
- Barney Stinson: Affirmative. Or, to put it another way, God bless America.
- Jeff Coatsworth: [after Marshall takes the job] I'll call you.
- Walk of Shame Woman: He's not gonna call.
- Jeff Coatsworth: Before you say anything, come take a ride with me in this awesome limo.
- Marshall Eriksen: Where are we going?
- Jeff Coatsworth: [Shrugs] Tuckahoe Funland.
- Marshall Eriksen: I'm sorry. It sounded like you said Tuckahoe Funland, The magic factory where dreams are made.