21 Jump Street (2012)

Ice Cube: Captain Dickson

Photos 

Quotes 

• Captain Dickson : He's white, that means people actually give shit.

  Schmidt : Um, I would just like to say that I would give a shit if he were black.

• Captain Dickson : Hey, hey! Stop fuckin' with Korean Jesus. He ain't got time for yo problems, he's busy wit Korean shit!

• Captain Dickson : [going over the rule of not having sexual relations with teachers or students; to Jenko]  That's you, man. Don't do it. Keep that dirty dick inside your pants. Don't fuck no students, don't fuck no teachers...

  Schmidt : Sir, I know we may look like a couple of lady-killers, but me and my partner will be super professional...

  Captain Dickson : Clearly I wasn't talking to you, big-titties. You cherub-looking motherfucker. I was talking to your partner, fake-ass Handsome McGee here. When I'm talking to him, I'm talking to him. When I say "shut the fuck up," I'm talking to you.

• [last lines] 

  Captain Dickson : New assignment. Since you two cowboys love to drink booze, smoke weed with kids, and fuck anything with a big ass in jeans with low self-esteem, I'm gonna send you to a place where all that shit is allowed.

  Jenko : Oh, I love Disneyland!

  Captain Dickson : You two sons of bitches are going to college!

  Schmidt : Yes!

  Jenko : No!

• Captain Dickson : The mission is this: infiltrate the dealers, find the supplier.

  Jenko : We get to be brothers?

  Captain Dickson : [slams desk]  Infiltrate the dealers, find the supplier!

  Jenko : But if we find the supplier first, we don't have to worry about the dealers.

  Captain Dickson : God damn.

  [slams desk] 

  Captain Dickson : Infiltrate the dealers, find the supplier!

• Captain Dickson : I know what you're thinkin': angry, black captain. Well guess what? I'm black, and I worked my ASS off to be the captain. And sometimes, I get a little angry, so suck a dick!

• Captain Dickson : You are here because you some Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus lookin' motherfuckers.

• Captain Dickson : Hey! stop fucking with Korean Jesus! He ain't got time for your problems! He's busy... with Korean shit!

• Captain Dickson : Who made this? Are you autistic?

  Schmidt : It IS artistic.

• Captain Dickson : Teenage the fuck up!

• Captain Dickson : Are you comfortable?

  Schmidt : Yes.

  Captain Dickson : Get your... motherfucking ass up when I'm talking to you! I know what ya'll thinking. Angry black Captain. It ain't nothing but a stupid stereotype. Well let me tell you something, I'm black, and I worked my ass off to become Captain, and sometimes I get angry. So suck a dick!

• Captain Dickson : Clearly, I wasn't talking to you, big titties! You cherub-lookin' mother fucker!

• Captain Dickson : They teenagers, man. They really stupid.

• [back at 21 Jump Street in Dickson's office, after getting expelled from school for fighting on stage] 

  Jenko : Is that it? You're not gonna... you're not gonna scream at us?

  Captain Dickson : [dryly]  Nope. I'm just gonna fire you.