- [Hulk shows up to once again fight the Abomination]
- Jennifer Walters: What is even happening here? This is a mess. None of these storylines make any sense.
- [Jen faces the audience]
- Jennifer Walters: Is this working for you?
- [Screen suddenly changes to the Disney+ Marvel menu]
- Jennifer Walters: Hey, what do you think you're doing? This menu is not gonna stop me. Just gonna break the inhibitor real quick.
- [She-Hulk punches out her title card and looks through the other titles]
- She-Hulk: All right, let's see here. No. Uh... No. Ah! Marvel Assembled. That'll do.
- [She-Hulk jumps out of her window and breaks through the Marvel Assembled title card]
- [She-Hulk enters K.E.V.I.N.'s office, which has giant screens playing every MCU film]
- She-Hulk: Whoa! What is this?
- [a robot suddenly emerges from the ceiling]
- K.E.V.I.N.: Hello, Jennifer.
- She-Hulk: K.E.V.I.N.?
- K.E.V.I.N.: It stands for 'Knowledge Enhanced Visual Interconnectivity Nexus'. Were you expecting a man?
- She-Hulk: Yeah. Why would I expect a giant AI brain and not a man? Wait, so you're the one who's making all the decisions here?
- K.E.V.I.N.: I will answer your questions, but you must first transform back to Jennifer.
- She-Hulk: Why?
- K.E.V.I.N.: You are very expensive.
- She-Hulk: Oh, sure.
- K.E.V.I.N.: But wait until the camera is off you. The visual effects team has moved on to another project.
- She-Hulk: Okay.
- [Camera pans to K.E.V.I.N]
- K.E.V.I.N.: There. Do it now.
- [She-Hulk changes to Jen off-screen]
- Jennifer Walters: Better?
- K.E.V.I.N.: Thank you. And to answer your question... Yes, I make the decisions. I possess the most advanced entertainment algorithm in the world, and it produces near-perfect products.
- Jennifer Walters: Near-perfect?
- K.E.V.I.N.: Some are better than others, but I leave that debate up to the Internet.
- Jennifer Walters: Well, K.E.V.I.N., I'm not happy with what's happening in my story.
- K.E.V.I.N.: You do not get to choose.
- [K.E.V.I.N. changes the screens to the last scene of the episode]
- Jennifer Walters: Why not? It's my show.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Incorrect. It's K-E-V-I-N's show.
- Jennifer Walters: Well, regardless of creative ownership, can we agree that it is a legal comedy?
- K.E.V.I.N.: If that's what you prefer to call it.
- Jennifer Walters: Then I would like to give my closing argument.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Oh, ha-ha. I see what you did there. You may proceed.
- Jennifer Walters: Thank you.
- Jennifer Walters: [sitting down] Oh, while I've got you here...
- K.E.V.I.N.: Oh, wait. You are sitting?
- Jennifer Walters: What's with all the daddy issues? We got Tony Stark. Daddy issues.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Jen.
- Jennifer Walters: Thor. Daddy issues. Loki. Same daddy, same issues.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Oh boy.
- Jennifer Walters: Star-Lord. Two daddies, two issues.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Jen, please stop.
- Jennifer Walters: Oh, when are we getting the X-Men?
- K.E.V.I.N.: I cannot tell you that.
- Jennifer Walters: Okay, back to She-Hulk. I do have some thoughts about the direction of Season 2.
- K.E.V.I.N.: You will not be able to access the K-E-V-I-N again.
- Jennifer Walters: What?
- K.E.V.I.N.: That error on our platform has been fixed.
- Jennifer Walters: Th... That's it? We're done?
- K.E.V.I.N.: That's it? You obliterated the thrilling ending K.E.V.I.N. formulated.
- Jennifer Walters: [gets up] Yeah, that's what Hulks do. We smash things. Bruce smashes buildings. I smash fourth walls and bad endings. And sometimes, Matt Murdock.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Okay, now get back to the show. See you on the big screen.
- Jennifer Walters: Really?
- K.E.V.I.N.: No.
- Jennifer Walters: Okay, whatever, K.E.V.I.N.
- [Jen prepares to walk away]
- Jennifer Walters: Should I transform back or is it... What's the most budget-friendly way to do this?
- [Jen enters her bedroom]
- Elaine Walters: [from the living room] Jennifer! Can you move the big bookcase for me? I think I want it close to the window.
- [Jen slumps down on her bed]
- Jennifer Walters: No!
- Elaine Walters: Oh, that's right. You can't be Girl-Hulk anymore.
- Jennifer Walters: It's She-Hulk, Mom. Or... was. But never again. Which I know is what I said I wanted, but this doesn't feel right.
- [Jen faces the audience]
- Jennifer Walters: This isn't even a reluctant superhero story. I'm just getting screwed over.
- [pause]
- Jennifer Walters: Is this what you guys want?
- Narrator: Jennifer Walters is a woman at a new low. She has no more fight left.
- [Jen gets up]
- Jennifer Walters: No, we're not doing a narrator. We're not that off the rails.
- [She-Hulk sneaks into the production office of her show]
- Writer Zeb: Guys, what do we get if the entirety of the second season is one extended dream sequence?
- Writer Jessica: I love the idea. That's the one.
- [She-Hulk enters the room]
- Writer Jessica: [whispering] Isn't she supposed to have an inhibitor?
- [the writers quiet down]
- Writer Jessica: Hey, is everything okay?
- She-Hulk: What the hell, you guys? What kind of stupid finale is this?
- Writer Jessica: Oh, we thought it'd be really cool, and like, unexpected.
- Writer Zeb: Yeah, like fun, kind of with a twist.
- She-Hulk: A twist? The bad guy steals my blood in order to give himself superpowers. Where did you come up with that original idea? Was that from every other superhero story ever?
- Writer Zeb: Okay, there are certain things that are supposed to happen in a superhero story.
- Writer Jessica: Exactly.
- [She-Hulk pounds her fists on the table]
- She-Hulk: Why don't we just do things our own way?
- Writer Jessica: This is the story that K.E.V.I.N. wants.
- Writer Zeb: Yeah.
- She-Hulk: Okay, then I wanna talk to K.E.V.I.N.
- [the writers laugh]
- Writer Jessica: No one talks to K.E.V.I.N.
- Writer Zeb: K.E.V.I.N.'s value is immeasurable, okay?
- Writer Jessica: Yes. You'll never even get close to him.
- Writer Zeb: I would murder you to protect K.E.V.I.N.
- She-Hulk: Okay, this is very creepy. The way you're talking about him, it's not healthy. I'm going to go talk to K.E.V.I.N. now.
- Narrator: Jennifer Walters, Esq. Lawyer, millennial, searching for a way to balance a career and her personal life. Then, an accidental dose of gamma-radiated blood alters her body chemistry. And now, when Jennifer Walters grows angry or outraged, a startling metamorphosis occurs, The creature is driven by rage and pursued by online trolls. She is provoked into a rampage that has landed her in prison. And now, she is seen only for the raging spirit that dwells within her.
- Jennifer Walters: The Marvel Cinematic Universe is known for its big spectacles and high-stakes plotlines, but it's often said that Marvel movies all end the same way...
- K.E.V.I.N.: Wait, who's saying that?
- Jennifer Walters: Perhaps, this is a result of following some unwritten rule that you have to throw a bunch of plot, and flash, and a whole blood thing that seems super suspiciously close to Super Soldier Serum at the audience in the climax. I propose we don't have to do that.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Huh.
- Jennifer Walters: It distracts from the story, which is that my life fell apart right while I was learning to be both Jen and She-Hulk. Those are my stakes, K.E.V.I.N.
- K.E.V.I.N.: The K-E-V-I-N is processing this new data. What is the ending you propose?
- [Jen looks at the screens]
- Jennifer Walters: Well, can we not do 'Todd gets Hulk powers'? Like, the powers aren't the villain. He is.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Erasing blood plot.
- [K.E.V.I.N. changes Todd back to normal]
- Jennifer Walters: Oh, and, and Bruce swooping down from literal outer space to save the day in my story? Uh-uh.
- K.E.V.I.N.: But Bruce is supposed to return to explain what he was doing...
- Jennifer Walters: No, no, no. We don't need to hear any of that.
- K.E.V.I.N.: But we were going to introduce...
- Jennifer Walters: Uh, save it for the movie.
- [K.E.V.I.N. erases Smart Hulk from the scene]
- K.E.V.I.N.: Recalculating. And Abomination?
- Jennifer Walters: After all that, I just want him to hold himself accountable.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Um... Okay.
- [K.E.V.I.N. changes Blonsky back to normal]
- Jennifer Walters: And enough of this angsty nighttime. Let's do this big climax in daylight.
- [K.E.V.I.N. changes the lighting effects of the scene]
- Jennifer Walters: Yeah.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Are we done here?
- Jennifer Walters: Oh, would not mind seeing Daredevil again. A woman has needs.
- K.E.V.I.N.: Historically, we've been light in that department.
- [Wong opens a portal in Blonsky's cell]
- Emil Blonsky: You took your time.
- Wong: Emil, my apologies for the delay.
- Emil Blonsky: You got sucked in another show, didn't you?
- Wong: We're really in an era of Peak TV. Do you have all your things?
- Emil Blonsky: Yeah. What's the guest policy at Kamar-Taj?
- Wong: Um...
- Emil Blonsky: Shared fridge?
- Wong: We're kind of all one with everything.
- Emil Blonsky: What about wi-fi?
- Wong: We have wi-fi.
- [Blonsky enters the portal before Wong closes it]
- Morris Walters: Now, Matt, Jen tells me you have your own practice.
- Matt Murdock: Yeah, in Hell's Kitchen.
- Elaine Walters: Hear that, Rebecca? His own practice.
- Aunt Rebecca: Hell's Kitchen doesn't sound like a very nice area.
- Matt Murdock: [CHUCKLES] It's not glamorous, but I grew up there. I always wanted to help those who can't afford legal services.
- Aunt Rebecca: So, you don't make much money.
- Jennifer Walters: Aunt Rebecca, you don't ask people how much money they make.
- Matt Murdock: It's fine. I don't do it for the money.
- Morris Walters: But you do make some money, right?
- Jennifer Walters: Dad!
- Morris Walters: It's very expensive raising kids in LA.
- Jennifer Walters: He's staying for a week.
- Matt Murdock: I didn't expect this conversation to go this way.
- Morris Walters: Matt, I'm gonna tell you right now, every conversation is going in that direction, so buckle up.
- [CHUCKLES]
- Matt Murdock: I really am. I'm just visiting.
- Aunt Melanie: Why not stay?
- Matt Murdock: Um, well...
- Uncle Tucker: Why not help with the hamburgers?
- [ushers Melanie away while glaring at Matt]
- Local News Reporter: In light of a criminal conspiracy, She-Hulk, the superpowered woman, cousin of the Hulk is cleared of her previous conviction. She-Hulk! Can you share details about your lawsuit against Todd Phelps and Intelligencia?
- She-Hulk: People like Todd Phelps have to be held responsible for their actions. The message is that if you attack, harm, or harass innocent people, I'm coming for you.
- Local News Reporter: Do you mean in a courtroom or as a superhero?
- She-Hulk: Both.
- Local News Reporter: Tell our viewers, who are you wearing today?
- She-Hulk: Okay.
- [walks off]
- Local News Reporter: The Difficult Diva of Law herself.
- Bruce Banner: I know I've been away on Sakaar for a while. I'll tell you all about it. But first, I have someone here that I'd like you all to meet. This is my son, Skaar.