- Michael Westen: [first lines - narration] In any operation, whether going into an embassy, or collecting debts for a bookie, it's important to layout a plan before you go into action. If you're going to disagree, it's best to get it out of the way before any shots are fired.
- Madeline Westen: You know Michael, I'd appreciate it if when you stopped by, it wasn't only to lose your police tail.
- Michael Westen: [noticing police car outside] Uh Oh, I gotta to take the over-the-roof and down-the-rain-gutter exit...
- Stacey Conolly: [auditor] The IRS does not allow classified deductions, Mr Axe. I'm disallowing this until the operation is made public. And then there's this...
- [dangles pistol using his pencil]
- Sam Axe: Well, you wanted documentation of my trip to the Middle East. That's it, the gun. I got it off this guy that was... in this group we were targeting.
- Stacey Conolly: Ah, so you stole it.
- Sam Axe: Oh I didn't steal it - he was... done with it.
- Stacey Conolly: So it was a gift.
- Sam Axe: It's not a gift! There was this thing, and then... the gun didn't have an owner anymore.
- Stacey Conolly: [dawning realization] I'm just gonna mark that down as a windfall...