Vacation (I) (2015)
Christina Applegate: Debbie Griswold
Photos
Quotes
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Debbie Griswold : Hey, you know, you never told us why you keep that teddy bear on the front of your truck.
Trucker : Oh, it makes the kids feel more comfortable.
Rusty Griswold : Oh yeah? You have kids?
Trucker : No.
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Debbie Griswold : James, you are not going to fight.
James Griswold : I am not going to stand here like a little bitch.
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Rusty Griswold : Well, I thought it'd be fun for the kids to see where you went to college.
Debbie Griswold : Oh, God. Why would that be fun for them, honey?
Rusty Griswold : You can give us a tour. Maybe one of them could study there one day.
James Griswold : Oh, no. No way, man. I've got my sights on something a little more Ivy League.
Debbie Griswold : [under her breath] Huh. Little fucker.
James Griswold : What, Ma?
Debbie Griswold : I love you. That's what I said.
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Rusty Griswold : Maybe for lunch we can find a burger place. You know, like a... Like a drive-through burger place.
James Griswold : I don't know, Dad. I think we should steer clear of that.
Rusty Griswold : Good one, James.
Debbie Griswold : All right, enough, you guys. Dad hit a cow, okay? Let's just moo-ve on.
Kevin Griswold : Oh, I got one.
Rusty Griswold : Yeah, let's hear it.
Kevin Griswold : James is a piece of shit.
Rusty Griswold : Kinda missed the point there, buddy.
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James Griswold : Mom, do you think Uncle Stone will let me ride his horse?
Debbie Griswold : I don't see why not.
Kevin Griswold : Do think I can shoot his guns?
Debbie Griswold : No, you cannot.
Kevin Griswold : Too bad.
Kevin Griswold : [to James] I would've shot you right off that fuckin' horse.
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Rusty Griswold : We're going to Walley World.
Debbie Griswold : What?
Kevin Griswold : This is some bullshit right here!
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Debbie Griswold : No one's calling me old. Fuck you. All right, boobs, pitcher. Let's go!
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Debbie Griswold : He doesn't save anybody's life.
Stone Crandall : Doesn't he? Well, every time he flies that little plane of his, he's saving lives by not crashing. That makes him a hero.
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Rusty Griswold : Never heard that laugh before. I don't like it.
Debbie Griswold : Hold my bag.
Rusty Griswold : Why? You're not actually going on this thing.
Debbie Griswold : Yes, I am. This Chug Run raised thousands of dollars for charity, all right? I might not have gotten good grades while I was here, but at least I did something.
Rusty Griswold : It sounds like you did a lot. You stuck your finger in the dean's penis.
Debbie Griswold : It's not important what I stuck my finger in and what I burnt down. What is important... is that these bitches are disrespecting me.
Rusty Griswold : Bitches?...
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Debbie Griswold : I was a Tri-Pi a long time ago, so... In fact, the Chug Run was my idea.
Heather : It was?
Debbie Griswold : Yeah.
Heather : Wait, are you Debbie Fletcher?
Debbie Griswold : Yeah
Heather : Oh, my shit. Oh, my shit! I can't believe it's you! Guys, come here! Bring over the book! It's Debbie fucking Fletcher.
Debbie Griswold : How do you know who I am?
Heather : Oh, my God, are you kidding me? You're like a legend at Tri-Pi. You're Debbie Do-Anything!
Rusty Griswold : [astonished] Debbie Do-Anything?
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Debbie Griswold : Tri-Pi, motherfuckers!
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Debbie Griswold : Honey, is that a swastika on there?
Rusty Griswold : Yeah. We won't use that.
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Rusty Griswold : I think I know my wife pretty well, and she wouldn't have done any of those things.
Debbie Griswold : But you know what? What's important is not whether I did them or I didn't do them. What's important is that you guys are idolizing very bad behavior here.
Heather : Uh, ew, you don't sound like Debbie Do-Anything...
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Rusty Griswold : That's a 2015 Tartan Prancer.
Debbie Griswold : Did you say "Tartan," honey'!
Rusty Griswold : Yeah. Tartan's the Honda of Albania.
James Griswold : Why'd you get an Albanian car, Dad?
Rusty Griswold : Renting a family car on Memorial Day weekend doesn't leave you with a lot of options. But this baby is pretty sweet. It's got all the latest Albanian technology.