American Dad! (TV Series)

G-String Circus (2009)

Seth MacFarlane: Stan Smith, Roger the Alien

Photos 

Quotes 

• Roger the Alien : Pillow Fight!

  [clocks the hooker, knocking her out] 

  Roger the Alien : Whoops, forgot I put some sodas in there...

• Tanqueray : [while doing a dance for Stan]  Oh, God! Leg cramp!

  Stan Smith : Are you all right?

  Tanqueray : I'm still sexy! I'm still sexy for you, baby!

  Stan Smith : Cramp, huh? You need to get a banana in you.

  Tanqueray : Uh, I don't do that, sir.

  Stan Smith : No, you need to eat a banana. You have a potassium deficiency.

• Stan Smith : Tanqueray, let me break it down for you. Exposing your body for money is wrong. The only people who should see you naked are your mother your doctor and your best friend in third grade. Just that one time. Under the waterfall. Jeremy Davis.

• Hayley Smith : [to Stan]  How's Tanqueray doing? Is she a dry cleaning mogul? Is she getting "a de-luxe apartment in the sky"?

  Stan Smith : I don't know if that's funny enough for you to leave on!

• Hayley Smith : I'm going to devote my time to the Heifer Project.

  Stan Smith : No daughter of mine is going into fatty porn!

• Roger the Alien : [to Stan]  I'll take your advice if it's love advice. So my man say he been working late, but then Trina call me and tell me she seen his ass in the club. But then when I ask him about this nonsense, he tells me he loves me. How do I make him tell me the truth, but keep our love million-dollar strong?

• Stan Smith : What do you want, Hayley?

  Hayley Smith : I just wanted to give you a store-warming present. A bag of my mulch. It's filled with crap, just like you.

  Stan Smith : Now, that is funny enough for you to leave on.

• Vic the Strip Club Owner : [When Stan auditions to be a male stripper]  Yeah! You're a natural! Now rip my pants off! Do it!

  [Stan rips his pants off] 

  Vic the Strip Club Owner : Now kiss me!

  Stan Smith : What?

  Vic the Strip Club Owner : I said, get out there!

  [Stan leaves] 

  Vic the Strip Club Owner : Protect yourself, Victor. You can't take another heartbreak right now.

• Hayley Smith : [to Roger about his disguise]  Are you supposed to be pregnant or fat?

  Roger the Alien : Eight months preggers. They don't make you buy the two-drink minimum when you're knocked up.

• Roger the Alien : [to Stan as he's dancing]  Look at me like you're a virgin!

• Roger the Alien : I made it rain, made it rain. I made it rain on them boys!

• Roger the Alien : [while dressed up as a doctor]  You know, the thing about working in a hospital is if you don't have a funny black friend, things get pretty boring.

  Turk : Vanilla Bear! Let's go grab a beer and see what Carla and the mean janitor are doing.

  Roger the Alien : Aah! Take whatever you want!