Glee (TV Series)

Grilled Cheesus (2010)

Cory Monteith: Finn Hudson

Photos 

Quotes 

• Finn Hudson : Dear Grilled Cheesus... First of all, you're super delicious. Please, Grilled Cheesus, please let us win our first football game. It would mean so much to Artie, and I think you kind of owe it to him. I mean, you sort of screw him in the leg department. And in return, Cheesy Lord, I'll make sure we honor you this week in Glee Club.

  [out in the football field, where the football team win the game. Artie scores the game winning touchdown. Finn takes off his helmet, kneels and throws his hands graciously in air] 

  Finn Hudson : THANK YOU, GRILLED CHEESUS!

• Rachel Berry : Finn, I'd like to give you something in exchange for what you gave me.

  [lets him touch her boobs] 

  Finn Hudson : [whispering]  Thank you, Grilled Cheesus...

• Finn Hudson : Mr. Shue, I have something to say. Something happened to me, and I can't really get into it, but it's shaking me to my core.

  Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : Oh my God, he's coming out.

  Finn Hudson : Well, yes, there is a man who's sort of recently come into my life, and that man is Jesus Christ.

  [Rachel looks at him with her eyes and mouth wide open] 

  Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : That's way worse.

• Finn Hudson : It all started a week ago. I was super hungry, and my mom was gone, so I busted out the George Foreman. It wasn't making the cool grill marks it used to after I tried to use it to dry my shoes, but when it comes to grilled cheese, I'm not that fancy. And when I pulled the sandwich out, I saw the face of God... Literally. I had made a Grilled Cheesus.

• Finn Hudson : What the hell happened?

  Kurt Hummel : My dad's in the hospital.

  Finn Hudson : I know. My mom just called me. I feel like I'm the last one to know!

  Kurt Hummel : Well, I'm sorry, Finn. It didn't occur to me to call you, because he's not your father.

  Finn Hudson : Yeah, well, he's the closest I'm ever going to get, okay? I know it may not look like what everybody else has, but I thought we were... sort of a family.

• Finn Hudson : I have to confess something. I'm the reason Sam got hurt. I asked for three things to happen: one, for us to win our first football game, two, to get to second base with Rachel, and three, to be the quarterback on the football team again. All those three things happened because I prayed for them to Grilled Cheesus.

  Emma Pillsbury : [unsure what to say]  Okay. Where to start?

  Finn Hudson : No, no, I know it sounds crazy, but it isn't. Jesus appeared to me on a sandwich, and it has special powers, I'm telling you. But I didn't mean for anybody to get hurt.

  Emma Pillsbury : Okay. Okay, let's just... let's take a second. Okay? Um... look, first, you won the football game because you actually have a coach who spends the game watching the plays rather than biting his toenails. And God didn't let you touch Rachel's boobs. Rachel did.

  Finn Hudson : Just the sides of them, but wait, why would she do that?

  Emma Pillsbury : Well, what were you doing right before you were... touching them?

  [seeing his expression] 

  Emma Pillsbury : What?

  Finn Hudson : I remember yawning. Right, 'cause we were talking about emotional stuff.

  Emma Pillsbury : Oh, yes, well, there you go. That's it. Girls like that. She felt close to you, thus the inappropriate touching. Uh, more importantly, you didn't hurt Sam. It was a 300 pound left tackle who just got expelled because he's on steroids and he's 23. God works in all kinds of mysterious ways, but I'm pretty sure he doesn't spend a lot of time trying to speak to us through sandwiches. You look disappointed.

  Finn Hudson : I am. It was sort of cool feeling like I had this direct line to God. Now I just feel like everybody else, you know, like we're all just floating around in space. I don't like that.

  Emma Pillsbury : You're not alone. The big questions are really big for a reason: they're hard. But you know what? Absolutely everybody struggles with them.

• Finn Hudson : Cheesus, I don't need to tell you how much you rule. You've given me everything I've prayed for, and it turns out Rachel's boobs are really awesome. Anyway, I need another favor, so, Cheesus... I pray that I'm made quarterback again. Sam's a good dude; I just think that I can deliver your message to the world more powerfully if I'm the most popular guy in the school again.

• Finn Hudson : You're upset about Kurt's dad, too?

  Rachel Berry : Yes. But more importantly, let's discuss your newfound love for Jesus and how it's affecting me. I want this relationship to go the distance, but I need to know that when I'm 25 and I've won a bunch of Tonys, and I'm ready to have intercourse and babies, that those babies will be raised in a certain way.

  Finn Hudson : You don't think you're gonna have sex 'till you're 25?

  Rachel Berry : I want my children to be raised in the Jewish faith. Both of my dads' peoples were slaves once. I need to know that my children will be free to worship in the way that I decide is right.

  Finn Hudson : Sure. Of course. Yeah, they should totally go to Jew church and... wear those hats and... and eat that salty orange stuff with their bagels.

• Finn Hudson : What up, Grilled Cheesus? I need to ask you for something. I didn't go to Sunday school, so I don't know if God works the same as a genie and I only get three wishes, but here's the thing. Dating Rachel is... great, but she's kind of a prude, and I'm sort of going crazy. Anyway, her boobs aren't that great, but they're still girl boobs, and I'd really like to touch them. So, Cheesus, considering that I've dedicated a week of my musical life to you, I hope you can see it in your heart to answer my prayers. Amen.