Mental (2012)

Rebecca Gibney: Shirley

Photos 

Quotes 

• Shaz : And she's very, very sorry.

  Doris : I'm very, very sorry.

  Shirley Moochmore : For what?

  Shaz : For being a cunt.

  [the others gasp] 

  Shaz : You are a cunt. You are the cuntiest cunt of all time. Admit your cunthood. It's an irrefutable fact, like gravity.

  Shirley Moochmore : Oh please don't make her say that.

  Shaz : Oh, all right, she's sorry for not being a very good sister.

  Shirley Moochmore : I'm sorry too.

• Shirley Moochmore : Are you one of Dr Thornbender's patients as well?

  Sandra : Yep. And I love her. And I don't like whiteys as a rule, but Shaz... Shaz isn't white. She's a new colour. She's mauve.

  Shaz : Awwwwww

  Sandra : It's true, Shaz, you're mauve. You're fucking mauve. Now Shaz knows. She knows. She's gonna change your fucking life.

  Shirley Moochmore : That's the impression I get.

• Barry Moochmore : Shirley. Shirley. I have been saving this for a special occasion. Your very own waterfall.

  [holds up commemorative plaque] 

  Barry Moochmore : Named it after you. Put it through the Council last year. It's in the rainforest near Mount Warning. It's only a few hours' hike from the road... if you use a machete.

  Shirley Moochmore : [takes plaque]  Oh. Shirley Moochmore Falls. It's true - I did fall. I fell deep in a forest and there was no one there to hear me. Except there was someone... and it wasn't you. You had a family, Barry. You had a wife.