- Jay Sherman: [after watching "The Patriot," unconvincingly] Well... wasn't that a wonderful piece of popcorn entertainment?
- Jay Sherman: [Interviewing Pikachu] Pikey, I understand in your most recent film you fired the director, Paul Verhoeven?
- Pikachu: Pikachu! Pika chu.
- Jay Sherman: There's also rumors that you're a ho-mo-sexual...?
- Pikachu: Now, that's just ridiculous!
- Jay Sherman: We've seen Mel Gibson as a man fighting for freedom in "The Patriot". And Mel Gibson as a rooster fighting for freedom in "Chicken Run".
- ["The Patriot" parody]
- Mel Gibson: Now, I'm not your master. I pay you a good salary.
- Movie Slave: I like picking cotton. It sure beats being cooped up in some stuffy old house!
- [Camera pans over to Spike Lee]
- Spike Lee: Fight the power, my brothers! And check out "Bamboozeled", now available on video - much sooner than I thought.