Penguins of Madagascar (2014)

Ken Jeong: Short Fuse

Photos 

Quotes 

• Skipper : Debbie!

  Kowalski : Dave.

  Skipper : Dave!

  Corporal : He hacked into our system.

  [There's no sound onscreen as Dave speaks] 

  Eva : Where's the sound?

  Kowalski : Dave, your microphone, it's not on.

  Classified : Click on the button with the picture of the microphone.

  Short Fuse : Every time a villain calls in, this happens.

  Dave : Hello?

  [the screen goes off] 

  Dave : Hello?

  Kowalski : But, now we can hear you.

  Short Fuse : So annoying!

  Kowalski : But we cannot see.

  Short Fuse : Every time!

  Classified : It's like talking to my parents.

• Classified : Short Fuse, you were supposed to handcuff them to the raft!

  Short Fuse : I tried, but they don't have hands, they just have flippers, Boss! And I have flippers. So it's flipping useless!

• Classified : What is that?

  [they see numerous painful weapons as they are going to be killed on the ride] 

  Classified : Oh, great.

  Short Fuse : Oh, no! This it it!

  Corporal : I don't wanna die, I'm squishy!

  [before they are killed by one of the weapons, the ride stops and goes reverse to see Private knocked out the squid controlling the ride] 

  Classified : OH NO, WE'RE DEAD! DEAD! DEAAAAAAAAAAD!

  Private : [to the North Wind team]  I pushed a button!

• Dave : [fixes the video connection]  How about now?

  Private : Hurray!

  Classified : Yes! Way to go, looks fantastic!

  Dave : Excellent! Now, where was I?

  [laughs maniacally] 

  Kowalski : Dave!

  Short Fuse : Grrrr!

  Dave : Greetings, North Wind. I see you've met my old zoo-mates.

  Skipper : We were never "mates." There was no mating.

  Classified : Turn yourself in, David. You are powerless now that I have stolen your precious Medusa Serum.

  Skipper : What? You didn't steal that!

  Classified : It's over.

  Dave : It's over?

  [mock-confusion] 

  Dave : Then... why did I call you? Wierd. OH! Maybe it was to show you *this*!

  [turns camera to reveal a large vat of Medusa Serum] 

  Kowalski : [collective gasp from everyone]  That is a lot of serum for four penguins.

  Dave : Oh, you thought this was just about you four? No, no-no-no-no. We're just getting started.

  [takes a selfie] 

  Dave : Now, if you will excuse me, I have to go do some shopping... FOR REVENGE!

  [hits button, buzzer sounds. hits button again, same result] 

  Dave : Wait. How do you...?

  Squid : [gurgles instructions] 

  Dave : What do I push?

  Squid : [points and gurgles] 

  Dave : Is it the red, or...

  Squid 2 : [points, gurgles, and slaps own head in frustration] 

  Dave : I thought it was... it's not this -

  [screen goes black]