Red Dwarf (TV Series)

Fathers & Suns (2012)

Rebecca Blackstone: Pree

Quotes 

• Lister : Pree! All JMC vessels undertake to return crew to Earth, including their dependents, right?

  Pree : You resigned, former crewman. There's no way back.

  Lister : I didn't resign... my dad did, we share the same name.

  Pree : Then you'd be on file and you're not.

  Lister : Did you check the medi-bay waiting list? Isn't there a file open - David Lister, medical pending?

  Pree : Yes.

  Lister : Isn't it true once I complete my medical and I have all my bios for stasis I become registered crew.

  Pree : Yes.

  Lister : [growing increasingly frantic]  And as registered crew, do I have the power to shut you down?

  Pree : Yes.

  Lister : And as your primary objective is to save registered crew members time and energy, shouldn't you just uninstall yourself now!

  Pree : Your logic is faultless.

  [Pree shuts down] 

• Rimmer : Can you repair the ship's engineering faults?

  Pree : I already anticipated you'd ask that question Arnold and I've repaired all the faults on B-deck already. There is now a 98% probability you will discuss my potential to change your lives and conclude that you are looking forward to seeing me in action.

  [Rimmer, Cat and Kryten look confused and startled] 

  Rimmer : ...So now we don't have that conversation and move straight onto the next conversation?

  Pree : Your next conversation is a conversation about not having the previous conversation, saying you were looking forward to the previous conversation and now feel a bit lost not having had that conversation.

• Pree : Since the JMC is no longer obligated to supply you with oxygen, your free supply will end in 8 minutes and counting.

  Lister : Oooh, I really need oxygen, it's really important to me lifestyle!

• Rimmer : Put on "Victory South" for me will you? A fascinating drama series about the American Civil War where the South win! Loved series 1, really looking forward to series 2.

  Pree : I deleted all 24 episodes earlier this morning Arnold because you didn't enjoy them.

  Rimmer : But I haven't seen them.

  Pree : But if you had you wouldn't have enjoyed them.

  Rimmer : But series 1 was brilliant. Why didn't I enjoy them?

  Pree : All your favourite characters were killed off, including the busty blonde heroine with no personality.

  Rimmer : Oh, I liked her!

• Rimmer : What am I supposed to do now?

  Pree : I thought you could use that time more fruitfully - perhaps finally reading War and Peace?

  Rimmer : I want to relax, unwind - not read a book that's longer than Rapunzel's pubic hair!

• Kryten : How long have we got before we reach the point of no return - the melting point?

  Rimmer : You mean the point where sun-cream and floppy hats are no defense because our noses have started melting onto our shoes which are floating down the corridor in a river made up of our own leg gravy?

  Pree : Well, we'll go as fast as we can, supervising officer, as I know you're keen to compete the mission.

  Rimmer : How long you mad goth bastard!