Game of Thrones (TV Series)

Walk of Punishment (2013)

Peter Dinklage: Tyrion Lannister

Photos 

Quotes 

• Tyrion Lannister : Master of Coin?

  Tywin Lannister : It would appear to be a position that best suits your talents.

  Tyrion Lannister : I'm quite good at spending money, but a lifetime of outrageous wealth hasn't taught me much about managing it.

• Tyrion Lannister : Ah, the return of the conquering hero.

  [Tyrion grins] 

  Tyrion Lannister : Does he have a little jaunt in his step?

  Bronn : The lad's practically skipping.

  Tyrion Lannister : You were gone a long time. I trust you got your money's worth - or should I say my money's worth.

  [Podrick places a satchel of gold on the desk] 

  Tyrion Lannister : It was a gift, Podrick! This is more than I give you in a year.

  Bronn : He's a squire. You don't pay him.

  Tyrion Lannister : Oh. Then it's much more than I give you in a year.

  Podrick Payne : They wouldn't take it, milord.

  Bronn : [confused]  Maybe they're trying to curry some favor with the new Master of Coin?

  Tyrion Lannister : Have you ever known a whore to turn down gold? They're happy enough to take it when I give it to them.

  Bronn : [looks at Podrick]  What did you tell them?

  Podrick Payne : I didn't tell them anything.

  Tyrion Lannister : What did you do to them?

  Podrick Payne : Lots of things.

  Tyrion Lannister : And they seemed to like these things?

  Podrick Payne : Yes, milord.

  Bronn : Of course they seemed to like it. They're paid to seem to like it.

  Tyrion Lannister : Only they weren't paid.

  Bronn : What're you saying? These ladies enjoyed him so much they gave him the time for free?

  Tyrion Lannister : Is that what you're telling us?

  [Podrick grins] 

  Tyrion Lannister : Sit down, Podrick.

  [Tyrion pours some wine] 

  Tyrion Lannister : We're going to need details. Copious details.

• [Tyrion is reviewing the kingdom's ledgers] 

  Tyrion Lannister : For years I've heard that Littlefinger is a magician: whenever the Crown needs money, he rubs his hands together and - poof! - mountains of gold.

  Bronn : Let me guess: he's not a magician.

  Tyrion Lannister : No.

  Bronn : He's stealing it?

  Tyrion Lannister : Worse: he's borrowing it.

  Bronn : What's wrong with that?

  Tyrion Lannister : We can't afford to pay it back. That's what's wrong with it. The Crown owes millions to my father.

  Bronn : Seeing as it's his grandson's ass on the throne, I imagine he'll forgive that debt.

  Tyrion Lannister : Forgive a debt? My father? For a man of the world, you're strangely naive.

  Bronn : I've never borrowed money before. I'm not clear on the rules.

  Tyrion Lannister : Well, ahem, the basic principle is I lend you money, and after an agreed-upon period of time, you return it with interest.

  Bronn : And what if I don't?

  Tyrion Lannister : Well, you have to.

  Bronn : But what if I don't?

  Tyrion Lannister : This is why I don't lend you money. Anyway, it's not my father I'm worried about, it's the Iron Bank of Braavos. We owe them tens of millions. If we fail to repay these loans, the Bank will fund our enemies. One way or another, they always get their gold back.

• [Tyrion, Bronn and Podrick walk through Littlefinger's brothel with a wagon filled with the kingdom's ledgers] 

  Tyrion Lannister : Podrick?

  Podrick Payne : Yes, my lord?

  Tyrion Lannister : After a long consultation with my colleague, Ser Bronn, I've finally found a suitable reward for the services you've provided over and above what might be considered reasonable. Tell me, Pod...

  [they enter a different room of the brothel] 

  Tyrion Lannister : ...have you ever been with a woman?

  Podrick Payne : No, my lord.

  Tyrion Lannister : Wonderful. Genna specializes in first-timers.

  [a curtain pulls back to reveal a naked courtesan] 

  Bronn : She's not bad with second-timers, either.

  Podrick Payne : Uh, my Lord...

  Tyrion Lannister : A fair enough repayment for putting your spear through my would-be killer's face, wouldn't you say? Now, as it happens Marei...

  [Genna approaches Pod, caressing him. He walks backwards, embarrassed. Another curtain opens to reveal another naked courtesan] 

  Tyrion Lannister : ...is quite the spear-handler herself. She's here to thank you for staying by my side as the battle raged all around us.

  Marei : He's handsome. You didn't tell me he was handsome.

  Tyrion Lannister : Kayla...

  [Marei approaches Pod. She and Marei start to strip him. A third curtain opens to reveal a very flexible courtesan] 

  Tyrion Lannister : ...is famous from here to Volantis... in certain circles. One of four women in the world who can perform a proper Meereenese Knot.

  Podrick Payne : [overwhelmed]  My Lord, I...

  [Kayla spreads her legs, demonstrating just how flexible she is] 

  Tyrion Lannister : She's here to thank you for being a thoroughly respectful fellow who's never once failed to address me as "my Lord." Be back in time for my supper.

  [Tyrion puts a bag of gold on the table and leaves with Bronn and the ledgers] 

  Bronn : Pace yourself, lad.