Draft Day (I) (2014)

Patrick St. Esprit: Tom Michaels

Quotes 

• Tom Michaels : I'm thinking about moving number one.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : Really?

  Tom Michaels : Yeah, well, as you know, Connors did a great job for us last year. But Callahan looks like... well, hell, Sonny, he's gonna be a franchise player for someone.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : You'd consider a trade?

  Tom Michaels : I'd consider the right one.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : [awkward silence]  Well, Jesus, Tom, at least act like you called me, all right? What do you... what do you want for it?

• Tom Michaels : I want your first pick this year, your first-rounder next year, and your third-rounder the year after that.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : Ouch. Ouch. No thanks.

  Tom Michaels : I know what it sounds like...

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : It sounds like you're trying to take advantage of me.

  Tom Michaels : I would never do that. Your seventh-rounder gives you, what, a running back with a rap sheet?

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : You don't know who I'm picking seven, Tom. I'm not gonna sell the farm for one guy.

  Tom Michaels : Well... you should. Your farm sucks.

• Sonny Weaver Jr. : Okay, I'm ready to do this, Tom. Our next two number one picks and a third-rounder for your pick today.

  Tom Michaels : Correction. Your next three first-round picks.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : What?

  Tom Michaels : You heard me.

• Tom Michaels : I'm really nervous about trading away the top pick. Callahan could be huge.

  Walt Gordon : That's true. But it might be worth it if someone's willing to give us their weight in gold to get him. What'd the Rams get when they traded away number two overall to the Redskins a few years back?

  Tom Michaels : Three number one picks and a number two.

  Walt Gordon : Well, shit, that'd work for me.

  Tom Michaels : Nobody's offering us that, Walt. Look... do you want the entire city of Seattle calling for our heads because we didn't pick Bo Callahan?

  Walt Gordon : Our fans know a good deal when they see one, Tom. Which is why we're not even gonna think about doing this unless we can find someone...

  Tom Michaels : Stupid enough to give us more than he should.

  Walt Gordon : Exactly. So, who's the most desperate guy you know?

• Sonny Weaver Jr. : You want me to give you the Cleveland Browns' first-round picks for the next three years?

  Tom Michaels : That's right.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : Well, that's insane, Tom. That... that wasn't your offer.

  Tom Michaels : Well, I changed my offer. Hell, we live in a different world than we did a couple of hours ago. I made you a fair offer, and you told me to enjoy my pancakes.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : You think I'm gonna give you my next three number one picks?

  Tom Michaels : You're panicking, Sonny, and I intend to take advantage of that.

• Tom Michaels : Pick number one. Get Bo Callahan.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : I got a quarterback.

  Tom Michaels : Brian Drew? Are you talking about Brian Drew? Jesus, you're hilarious. Guy barely made it through half the season before getting injured last year. I have the golden ticket, Sonny. If I give it to you, you get to save football in Cleveland.

• Walt Gordon : Have we tried everyone?

  Tom Michaels : Everyone worth asking. So far, no one's willing to overpay. Shit. I really thought I could get Sonny Weaver to bite. I mean, he just lost his old man, and...

  [his phone rings; smirking, he shows Walt the caller ID] 

  Walt Gordon : Fleece him.

• Sonny Weaver Jr. : I have the golden ticket now, Tom, and if I give it to you, and if I give it to you, you get to save Seahawk football in Seattle.

  Tom Michaels : Um... how 'bout I give you number two picks?

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : No. Mm-mm. Mm-mm. No, I want my picks back. All of 'em. I want all three years of this team's future back.

  Tom Michaels : That's not fair!

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : Well, you wanna cry about it, Tom, or you wanna make a little magic before the clock runs out on both of us?

  Walt Gordon : $7 million cheaper solves our salary cap problem. We're still gonna give the fans what they want.

• Sonny Weaver Jr. : Make me a deal, Tom, at six, and you get your boy wonder.

  Tom Michaels : What do you want?

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : I want my number ones back. All of 'em.

  Tom Michaels : That's crazy. Why would I give them back?

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : Because, at the end of the day, no one's the wiser, Tom. You haven't lost anything, and you get the quarterback messiah you've always wanted for $7 million less.

  Tom Michaels : [glancing at Walt]  Nah. No, I can't do it. I'd look like an idiot, like I panicked. You take him. You obviously don't want to. I'll stick with my draft picks.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : Yeah, but you want him, Tom, don't you? Seahawks fans want a hero, and you denied 'em.

  Tom Michaels : Not that bad.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : Don't lie to me. I checked all the Seahawks fan blogs and chat rooms. They're all calling for your head. Ever since you traded away Callahan, the barbarians are at the gate.

• Sonny Weaver Jr. : Okay. Screw it! No more offer. It's off the table, Tom. I'm taking Callahan.

  Tom Michaels : Whoa, whoa, no, no. Wait, wait! All right. You have a deal. I'll give you your picks. We have a deal.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : [urging his scouts to be silent, he mutes the call]  What else do we need?

  Ali : Special teams. Putney! Get Putney!

  Thompson : [the scouts all mutter in agreement]  David Putney.

  Coach Penn : Yeah. Putney.

  Tom Michaels : Hello? Sonny?

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : [unmuting the call]  I'm sorry, that deal's now off the table.

  Tom Michaels : What?

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : We live in a different world than we did just thirty seconds ago.

  Tom Michaels : What? What do you want now?

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : I want my picks back, and I want David Putney. I need a punt returner.

  Tom Michaels : Where the hell'd that come from?

• Sonny Weaver Jr. : Tom, it's Sonny.

  Tom Michaels : Jesus, Mary, and Whatnot. Do I owe you a thank you, Weaver?

  [his scouts all mutter sarcastic calls of appreciation] 

  Tom Michaels : Jacksonville's on the clock, and I'm one more crazy shitshow from insanity. Can you imagine scoring three first-round picks and Bo Callahan? Lord God, let that infant John Carson screw this up.

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : It's Jeff Carson, Tom, and he doesn't have the pick. I do.

  Tom Michaels : What?

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : I just made a trade with Jacksonville. I'm on the clock. It's me.

  Tom Michaels : Bullshit.

• Tom Michaels : Sonny, what'd you give 'em?

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : No time for that. I'm on the clock. I'm gonna pick Bo, Tom. Unless you want him more. And if so, let's make a deal.

  Anthony Molina : We still have Bo Callahan?

  Tom Michaels : What the hell's going on, Sonny?

  Sonny Weaver Jr. : Everyone thinks there's something wrong with the kid, but you don't, all right? You've done your due dilligence. You're about to pull off the move of the century. But you need my pick to do it. So make me an offer.