- Twilight Sparkle: Oh my gosh, I think I did it! If I can find a way to read The Art of Invisibility Spells, and Thornhoof's Brief History of Canterlot at the same time, that could leave me a half-hour scheduling window! Huh?
- [magic crackling, wind blowing]
- Twilight Sparkle: What's going on?
- [another Twilight Sparkle, wearing a damaged black sneaking suit, an eyepatch, a wild hairstlye, and a cut on one cheek, appears; present Twilight yelps]
- Future Twilight Sparkle: Twilight, you've got to listen to me!
- Twilight Sparkle: Who are you? I mean, you're me, but I'm me too. How can there be two 'me's? It's not scientifically possible. *You* are not scientifically possible!
- Future Twilight Sparkle: Twilight, please! I have a very important message for you from the future!
- Twilight Sparkle: You're from the *future*?
- Future Twilight Sparkle: That's right, now listen...
- Twilight Sparkle: What happened to you? The future must be awful.
- Future Twilight Sparkle: Please! I don't have much time!
- Twilight Sparkle: Is there some sort of epic pony war in the distant future or something?
- Future Twilight Sparkle: Actually, I'm from next Tuesday morning, but that's not important right now!
- Twilight Sparkle: I can't believe time travel is really possible! How did you, I mean, *I* figure it out?
- Future Twilight Sparkle: The time spells are in the Canterlot archives. But that's not...
- Twilight Sparkle: Really? Where? I've never seen them.
- Future Twilight Sparkle: They're in the Star Swirl the Bearded wing. Now, you have to listen to...
- Twilight Sparkle: Is time travel fun, or does it hurt? I have so many questions-
- [muffled voice; Future Twilight sticks her hoof in present Twilight's mouth]
- Future Twilight Sparkle: I have something extremely important to tell you about the future, and I only have a few seconds so you've got to listen! Whatever you do, don't-
- [magic crackling; she disappears]
- Twilight Sparkle: Future Twilight? Oh no! What was she trying to warn me about? Her clothes, her mane, that scar... oh, what a mess she is!... I mean, I am... or I... will be...
- [gasps]
- Twilight Sparkle: She must want me to prevent whatever horrible thing happens in the future!
- [gasps]
- Twilight Sparkle: [having just smashed through Pinkie's party supplies, Twilight has a funny-looking eyeglasses/mustache/nose disguise on] Listen, everypony! I've got something really important to say!
- [ponies laugh]
- Twilight Sparkle: [she notices the mask and knocks it off] This is no laughing matter! We have a crisis on our hooves!
- [gasps]
- Twilight Sparkle: I've just been visited by myself from the future!
- [more laughing]
- Twilight Sparkle: This isn't a joke! My future self tried to warn me about a horrible disaster that's going to occur sometime before next Tuesday morning!
- Applejack: What kind of disaster?
- Twilight Sparkle: I don't know! I got sucked back into the future before I could explain!
- Twilight Sparkle: [disaster-proofing Ponyville, looking at a checklist] Done, and done, and done. Applejack, what about the Everfree Forest?
- Applejack: The perimeter's clear.
- Twilight Sparkle: Great.
- Rainbow Dash: And my team gave the all clear from Fillydelphia to Las Pegasus.
- Twilight Sparkle: Excellent. Well, we've done everything on the list, but still... future Twilight looked like she'd been through a horrible ordeal. I just have this nagging feeling we should be looking for something bigger than loose bolts and leaky pipes.
- Fluttershy: [rubbing the belly of Cerberus, the giant three-headed dog that guards Tartarus] Who's the cute widdle three-headed dog?
- Twilight Sparkle: Wow, I knew you were good with animals, but this is amazing.
- Fluttershy: Aww, he's just a big furry guy who got out of his yard, that's all. Right, Cerberus? Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy?
- Pinkie Pie: [screaming]
- Twilight Sparkle: Pinkie.
- Pinkie Pie: [stops screaming] Yes, Twilight?
- Twilight Sparkle: Do you have a ball I can borrow?
- Pinkie Pie: I have balls stashed all over Ponyville, in case of ball emergency.
- [pulls out a ball from a hole in a tree]
- Twilight Sparkle: I did everything I could think of to change the future. But it didn't work. So maybe it's not what I do... maybe it's what I *don't* do! If I stand right here and don't move a muscle until next Tuesday, I can't possibly do whatever it is that future Twilight wanted to warn me not to do!
- Spike: Really? So... no matter what happens, you're not gonna move a muscle, huh? Then maybe you won't mind if I... eat an entire tub of ice cream!
- [grabs a tub of ice cream, splatting it over himself]
- Spike: Mmm!
- [muffled]
- Spike: So good!
- [eating noisily]
- Twilight Sparkle: [through gritted teeth] Spike, stop! Think of the stomach ache!
- Spike: [chuckles] Stomach ache, huh? That's future Spike's problem.
- Twilight Sparkle: [trying to predict and prevent any disaster from happening] Ah, Pinkie, I'm glad you're here. Can you help me recalibrate the apertures on the nine and quarter catadioptric telescopes?
- Pinkie Pie: Sure!
- Twilight Sparkle: [gasps] Pinkie, did you finish recalibrating the apertures on the nine and quarter inch catadioptric telescopes?
- [looks through the telescope]
- Pinkie Pie: I have no idea!
- [Twilight tilts the telescope up and points it at the sun]
- Twilight Sparkle: Ah! My eye!
- Pinkie Pie: [begins rummaging in the fireplace] Don't worry, Twilight, I have eye patches stashed all over Ponyville, in case of eye patch emergency.
- [puts an eyepatch on Twilight]
- Pinkie Pie: There! Now you look like a pirate! A sleepy pirate, with a really weird mane cut.
- Twilight Sparkle: [after accidently looking at the sun through a telescope, Pinkie Pie puts an eye patch on Twilight] The eye patch...! Another sign! Nearly all the signs have come true! I haven't done a thing to prevent the catastrophe! If Tuesday's tomorrow, and the disaster happens by Tuesday morning, then there's only one solution. I'll just have to... *stop time*.
- Spike: [trying to sneak into the Canterlot Archives wearing black jumpsuits] I dunno why we have to wear *these* things, either.
- Pinkie Pie: Aren't we wearing them for fun?
- Twilight Sparkle: [hushed] No, there's nothing *fun* about this!
- Twilight Sparkle: [sees the entrance to the archives] Huh. How'd I miss that? Look at all those priceless magic scrolls. There are more than I ever imagined!
- Pinkie Pie: Twilight, the guard!
- Twilight Sparkle: [gasps] What do we do, what do we do?
- Royal Guard: Hey, Twilight, haven't seen you in a while. Let me open that for ya.
- [he opens the gate]
- Twilight Sparkle: [chuckles nervously] Thanks!
- Spike: Twilight, it's over! It's officially Tuesday morning.
- Twilight Sparkle: Nnngh, no! Tuesday morning, the disaster! Incoming!
- Spike: I dunno, Twilight. I don't see any disasters. Looks like a pretty nice day.
- Princess Celestia: [walks by] Good morning, Twilight, love the new hairstyle. Well, happy Tuesday!
- Twilight Sparkle: Why isn't anypony surprised to see me sneaking around in here? Is it possible there never was a disaster? That I've just been making myself frantic over nothing?
- Spike: I don't get it. If future Twilight wasn't warning you about a disaster, then what was she trying to tell you?
- Twilight Sparkle: [giggles] I don't know. But I do know one thing. I look ridiculous.
- Twilight Sparkle, Spike: [laughing]
- Spike: Yeah, you do!
- Twilight Sparkle: And it's all because I couldn't stop worrying and let the future handle itself! Well, not anymore. From now on, I'm gonna solve problems as they come, and stop worrying about every little thing!
- Spike: That's great! Does that mean there won't be any more late night pacing?
- Twilight Sparkle: No more late night pacing. If only I had learned this lesson a week ago, we wouldn't have had to go through all this.
- Twilight Sparkle: [arriving back from her time travel to the past] -waste your time... worrying... about... ugh, I can't believe I just did that.
- Pinkie Pie: Did you tell her about the cool birthday present?
- Twilight Sparkle: Remember last week when future Twilight came to warn me about something? That was *me* trying to warn *myself* not to worry so much! Now I'm gonna spend the next week freaking out about a disaster that doesn't even exist! Ugh...
- Pinkie Pie: Ah, don't worry about it. It's past Twilight's problem now.
- Twilight Sparkle: [giggles] Huh, I guess you're right, Pinkie.
- Spike: [stomach growls] Ohhh... my stomach... I, I think it's all that ice cream... I thought the stomach ache would be future Spike's problem... but now I *am* future Spike. Ohh...
- Twilight Sparkle, Pinkie Pie: [giggling]
- Twilight Sparkle: Come on, future Spike. Let's get you home.
- Rainbow Dash: [after seeing Spike eating ice cream] What's going on?
- [to Twilight]
- Rainbow Dash: Aren't you gonna stop him?
- Spike: She sure isn't! In fact, she's not gonna move 'til next Tuesday! She thinks it'll prevent the disaster from happening!
- Rainbow Dash: [laughs] Oh, this is too rich.
- [gasps]
- Rainbow Dash: Hey, Twilight! There's a mouse right behind you!
- Rainbow Dash, Spike: [both burst out laughing because Twilight fell for the trick]
- Spike: [Spike groans in pain as stomach begins churning, as the excessive amount of ice cream he's been consuming has made him too full] My stomach!
- [falls on his back]
- Spike: I... I think it's all that ice cream. I thought the stomach ache would be future Spike's problem, but now I am future Spike!
- [groans again while holding his aching belly]