Guns Don't Kill People (2012)

Chris Bonno: Gilbert

Quotes 

• Gilbert : You think I like doing this?

  [tugs at ski mask] 

  Gilbert : This thing is itchy and hot!

• Gilbert : Well, they tied me up and told me to keep my face in the booties. All these pictures of... booties.

• Gilbert : I understand this guy's wife is very jealous.

  Norm : Jealous... Jealousy... So should we go have sex with her or what?

  Gilbert : No, we should not 'go have sex with her or what.' I figured we'd hit him over the head with something like a hammer. You know? Blunt force trauma.

  Norm : Eh, that's a Junior Varsity move.

• Norm : I know it sounds crazy, but it's true, Gilbert. Women pee out of their clitorises.

  Gilbert : No, they do not pee out of their clitorises. Jesus, Norm, we have to focus!

  Norm : No, they do, Gilbert. They do. They've got this little hole. I've seen a lot of films that would indicate exactly what I'm talking about.

• Gilbert : Do you like money?

  Dirty Dan : No...

  Gilbert : Do you... not like money?

• Gilbert : I have been out working. Doing things that would embarrass my family, let alone me... To pay off two hundred thousand dollars! And I come here and you're writing

  [reads document] 

  Gilbert : ... Xena Fan Fiction.

  Norm : They're a beautiful couple, Gilbert. But you wouldn't understand.

• Gilbert : I'm sorry he said he'd kick you in the dick.

  Lance : It's okay. I get that a lot. Look at me.

• Norm : What? You always want to be nothing? This is our last chance, Gilbert. If we blow this, what else is there? Do you like being poor? Do you like asking your mother for money?

  Gilbert : [walking away]  Oh, yeah, 'Mom! Mom, can I have a dollar?' Yeah, Norm, that's exactly what I want. That's exactly what I want!