- Clark: Wait. Wait, hold on. Where's the band? 'Cause there's no way you guys are making this magic with just your mouths.
- Creed Bratton: That's what she said.
- Dwight Schrute: At first I drove myself crazy thinking about the things I should have done differently. I never should have played that joke on Erin. I never should have hollowed out this damn pumpkin in the first place. Then I realized that I was being silly. I mean the pumpkin should rot off of my head in a month or two. Right?
- Erin Hannon: The more I hear about all this acapella drama, the more I think it's kind of pathetic. But when you're with someone, you put up with the stuff that makes you lose respect for them And that is love.
- Creed Bratton: [wearing a blood-splattered shirt] It's Halloween. This is really really good timing.
- Dwight Schrute: You think I don't have anxiety? I have anxiety all the time. Every waking moment of my life is sheer torture. I have land disputes to settle, and idiot cousins to protect, and ne'er-do-well siblings to take care of. And I don't need some stupid pill to get me through all this.