Two-Bit Waltz (2014)

John Pirruccello: The Therapist

Photos 

Quotes 

• [first lines] 

  The Therapist : And why is it that you're here?

  Maude : I saw a sign today that said, "Randy's donuts, tastiest donuts you've ever endured."

  The Therapist : And why is it that you're here?

  Maude : I want to die.

  The Therapist : Recently, how have you been occupying your time?

  Maude : I haven't been.

• Maude : Everyone's problems are interesting themselves, just not so much to other people. That's why all therapists want to kill themselves.

  The Therapist : I don't seem to be there yet.

  Maude : In time you will learn.

• Maude : Unpleasant circumstances are often the orb from which the idea may brew.

  The Therapist : I think you're thinking of a crock pot.