Brad Jones: Self

Quotes 

• Jeff : What are the main themes of rock music? When I went through my own record collection, I was shocked! And what about the lifestyles of the popular groups and artists? Some are admitted homosexuals!

  Brad Jones : Kid... Go fuck yourself. Your decision is to not listen to rock music. Fine. My decision is that I don't have to listen to any more of what you have to say. Because as soon as you bring your homophobic beliefs into this one-sided conversation, I am done with you.

• Brad Jones : Once Church is over, he returns to his wicked, sinful ways of having taste in music.

  Mrs. Sims : You're home early. How was the youth meeting tonight?

  Jeff : Oh, it was pretty good. Two kids got saved.

  Brad Jones : Was there an exorcism at this church service? Or a fire? He should really be more specific with that statement!

• [first lines] 

  Brad Jones : Hey, propaganda! It only took me three episodes in to get into "Reefer Madness" territory. So let's find out why rock music is evil... and why you will probably go to Hell for listening to it.

• Brad Jones : First and foremost, this is not a video of me attacking religion. I would be saying these things no matter what group put out this arguably slanderous film. It's a stupid movie made by very, very stupid people, who don't speak for their entire religion.

• Brother Owen : Mrs. Sims, kids identify so closely with their music that if someone attacks that music, it's a personal attack on the kids themselves.

  Brad Jones : Sometimes that's true. I hate most of today's music and I also hate most of today's youth.

  Brother Owen : Do you watch soap operas on television?

  Mrs. Sims : Yes, but what does that...

  Brother Owen : Mrs. Sims, Jeff could scripturally come up with the same arguments for why soap operas are bad as you could for why rock music is bad.

  Brad Jones : Again, very true. Back in the 80's, my love for Tears for Fears did stem from my mom's love of Patch and Kayla. Okay, I love Patch and Kayla, too. "Days of Our Lives" was awesome in the 80's! That's when it had Nick the Pimp!

• Brother Owen : These are, uh, some albums and a couple of tapes from my own personal collection.

  Brad Jones : [imitating Brother Owen]  It's this new up-and-comer named Marilyn Manson. I think he's going places. Oh, and here's some Godsmack.

• Melissa : Jeff, did you get the tickets to the rock concert?

  Brad Jones : [imitating Melissa]  I'm so excited about it that I'm not even gonna say what the name of the band is!

• Melissa : And I'm going to the concert! Maybe with Dennis; he'd love to go out with me!

  Brad Jones : [imitating Melissa]  He has individuality, personality, thinks for himself, sticks up for his tastes... come to think of it, Dennis *is* a much better person than you!

• Brad Jones : After days go by of Jeff's social life falling apart, he has to confide once again to Brother Owen.

  Jeff : It's been six days now. Sometimes I want to change that channel so badly, but I won't.

  Brad Jones : Yeah, fuck free will!

• Jeff : I tried to interview two teenagers at a record department, but when they found out I was a Christian, they hassled me a little bit.

  Brad Jones : They probably hassled you because you went up to strangers and called them godless heathens.

• Brad Jones : You know, at this point, this is getting kinda sad. We are looking at a movie about how this kid's elders are taking something as innocent as his taste in music, and using it to destroy his personality and his life!

• [last lines] 

  Jeff : Everything that we do should be to glorify Jesus Christ!

  [smashes a record on the pulpit] 

  Brad Jones : Rock, it's your decision! And I've decided that the most likely conclusion is that ten years after this movie takes place... Jeff probably hung himself.

  [smiles as Lloyd leaps on top of the couch behind him] 

• Brad Jones : As you can imagine, things don't go well. Someone turns on rock music which sends Jeff into a pussy - I mean a frenzy.

  Marty : This is a party. What do you want, Amazing Grace?

  Jeff : That's our youth group in there. Then why did you bother to invite me if you plan to play that garbage?

  Marty : Man, it's like I told you before. Don't push it down my throat! Now if you want to have some fun, okay! But if you don't like it, then just go home to Momma!

  Brad Jones : No, no! I want him to stay! Stay and tell me how that instrumental rock song is evil. So far, you've only had a problem with lyrics. So what's the matter with this one?

  [no answer] 

  Brad Jones : Oh, you're not gonna answer? Okay. This far into the movie, I'm not entirely convinced that the audience is supposed to be rooting for Jeff. Who could possibly root for him? Maybe this is a propaganda film on the flipside! It's about how Jeff's religion is turning him into a terrible person!

• Brad Jones : You wanna say music is evil? Fine. That's your right, but you at least have to back it up. This is a really, really depressing movie. I'm not kidding! This is actually one of the more depressing things I've sat through, and I watched "Salo" and "A Serbian Film!" This is a movie about a kid whose love for music is transmorphed into something quote-unquote "evil" by his paranoid parents, until he is turned into a raving, bigoted fanatic, who loses his friends, his personality, and any sense of independence. You can make your point without writing off an entire genre of music as a tool of devil-worshipping, drug-abusing homosexuals. That makes you sound fucking crazy, especially when your examples are debunked!

• Brother Owen : Now with the work almost completed, you're facing some difficult choices. It's not as easy as a simple yes or no, is it?

  Brad Jones : Yes, it *is* that easy. Just be a good person. If there is a God, I don't think he cares if you have "The Golden Age of Wireless," by Thomas Dolby. Although I'm sure some of the characters in this movie would prefer that you listen to "She Blinded Me with Creationism."

• Brad Jones : [Jeff called The Captain and Tennille a bad influence]  The Captain and Tennille is a sin now, too? Calling The Captain and Tennille a sin is a sin against the word sin.