- Billy Soto: Nice kicks, mama! That velcro?
- Laura Diamond: The boys and I have gone lace free. Gains me a good extra 90 seconds of sleep per night
- Billy Soto: Okay, score!
- Laura Diamond: Tell me about it! And the padding on these bad boys?
- Billy Soto: Uh, huh?
- Laura Diamond: It's like walking on loafs of Wonder Bread!
- Billy Soto: Mmm, mmm! Remind me to get a pair!
- Laura Diamond: Miss Marquez? A few questions
- Natalie Marquez: What are you? The fashion police?
- Laura Diamond: No, we're the police-police!
- Laura Diamond: [reading the text on her phone] Oh, damn it! My left-over salmon surprise gave my babysitter food poisoning! I got to go. I got to bring Nick to taekwondo and Harry to soccer.
- Billy Soto: And why don't they do the same thing?
- Laura Diamond: Because that would make life easy!
- Jake Broderick: Where were you this morning at 5 AM?
- Alison Torres: Home
- Billy Soto: Can anyone corroborate that?
- Alison Torres: Eh, just my Hitachi Magic Wand! FYI, it's a life changer
- Laura Diamond: Good call. Billy and I are in
- Jake Broderick: You wanna go to a fashion industry charity fundraiser?
- Laura Diamond: No, I wanna go to a room filled with hundreds of potential suspects
- Gabriella Luca: Hmm, thank you. I don't think I ever eaten out of a $12,000 Tom Burk hand bag
- Laura Diamond: $12,000? For $12,000 it better pick up the kids, wash the dishes and then let me finish first!
- Meredith Bose: Steal that sweatershirt from lost and found?
- Laura Diamond: Nope, got it from your locker! By the way, you're down to your last panty liner