- Dr. Camille Saroyan: Would you mind passing me the victim's nose?
- Angela Montenegro: It's weird that that's not a weird question.
- Dr. Jack Hodgins: So, it was the hooker in the bedroom with a candlestick. Tell me this case is not starting to sound like a game of Clue.
- Dr. Camille Saroyan: Okay. I have everything we need to rehydrate an eyeball. Except for a good reason.
- Dr. Camille Saroyan: [Some parts of the victim's remains fell upon her] Ah, uhm, can someone please retrieve this piece of evidence, so it's not compromised?
- Dr. Jack Hodgins: [Grabs the camera] Yeah, in a second. I just got to get a picture of this for the Christmas party
- Dr. Camille Saroyan: Seriously?
- Dr. Oliver Wells: Smile
- Dr. Jack Hodgins: Just one second
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: Well, why did you call Mommy a jackass?
- Christine Booth: Because you said I could. I told my teacher that, too.
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: Did you call your teacher a jackass?
- Christine Booth: Yes. You said I could.
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: Not your teacher...
- Christine Booth: Why not?
- Seeley Booth: Yeah, why not, Mom?
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: You're not helping, Booth.
- Seeley Booth: Come on, come on, now, Mommy's gonna talk to us.Okay, we are gonna sit here and we are gonna listen to Mom explain to us and we are gonna listen to Mom explain to us why not.
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: Really?
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: The parabolic dental arch indicates the victim was Caucasian, while the lag of sub pubic concavity suggest male. Age will be a bit more difficult
- Dr. Oliver Wells: I got age. Slightly coarse granularity of the auricular surfaces puts him mid to late 20s. Piece of cake
- Dr. Camille Saroyan: This is not a competition, Oliver
- Dr. Oliver Wells: You are delightfully naïve
- Seeley Booth: Great. Okay. Thank you so much for coming in. I think we got everything we need right now. Uh, and if we have any more questions, we'll get in touch with you, okay?
- [All stand up and leave the room]
- Annie Wachlin: You've been such a help and nice. Am I supposed to tip you guys?
- Seeley Booth: No! Right this way, this way. No tips!
- Dr. Oliver Wells: I finished reconstructing the victim's skull and, of course, found exactly what we were looking for
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: Comminuted fracturing. The damages to the frontal bone would have resulted in severe cerebral contusions
- Dr. Oliver Wells: Meaning I found cause of death. Not too bad, huh?
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: You were merely following instructions given to you
- Dr. Oliver Wells: So that's how you want to play it? Okay. Not a problem, because this well runs deep! Very, very deep
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: Dr. Wells, I often find you to be a real pain in my ass
- Dr. Oliver Wells: Wow! If I wasn't so shocked, I might be offended
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: The occasional curse word can serve as a healthy form of non-violent retribution
- Dr. Oliver Wells: So, you swore to stop yourself from hitting me?
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: Given your personality, I'd imagine you're quite used to that
- Dr. Camille Saroyan: I'm calling it a night, Dr. Wells. We can come back and hit it fresh in the morning
- Dr. Oliver Wells: Dr. Brennan already cursed me out. I'm not leaving until I find something that impresses the crap out of her tomorrow morning
- Dr. Camille Saroyan: Dr. Brennan cursed you out?
- Dr. Oliver Wells: She said I was a pain in her ass! Not a pain "in the ass", a pain "in her ass", specifically her ass
- Dr. Camille Saroyan: [More to herself] Way to go, Dr. Brennan
- Dr. Jack Hodgins: So, then this isn't the murder weapon
- Dr. Oliver Wells: Which means I still have a change to take down Dr. Brennan
- Dr. Jack Hodgins: Okay, look, I like a good underdog story as much as the next guy, but my money is on Dr. B
- Dr. Oliver Wells: What the hell, Hodgins? I thought we were, you know, beard buddies?
- Dr. Jack Hodgins: Sorry, dude, but I have worked with this woman for over 10 years and I have never, not once ever, see anyone better. And, as for the beards, when I look to you, I felt like I'm looking in a mirror and I have a hangover. You might want to, you know, clean up a bit there
- Dr. Oliver Wells: I'm gonna remember this conversation when I'm the one running this thing and you are looking for a job
- Dr. Jack Hodgins: In the world where that scenario exists, I won't need a job, because I will be the power forward of the Lakers
- Dr. Oliver Wells: Which means, I still have a change to bring this case home. Oh, you are swearing in your head right now, aren't you?
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: I believe the phrase is "like a naval seaman"
- Dr. Oliver Wells: I believe it's "like a sailor"
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: That's what I said
- Seeley Booth: Bones, Christine said the word a-s-s and where I come from, that's a swear word.
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: J-a-c-k-a-s-s... Jackass isn't profanity. It's another name for a donkey.
- Seeley Booth: No, it's a gateway swear word, which leads to other, four-letter swear words.
- Seeley Booth: [Trying to get rid of Aubrey] I thought you had paperwork to do?
- James Aubrey: Yeah, which no one ever reads
- Dr. Oliver Wells: Dr. Brennan, when you first started, how many hours were you pulling?
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: Before I had a family, I was in the lab anywhere from 10 to 15 hours a day, including weekends. Why do you ask?
- Dr. Oliver Wells: Because one day I plan on surpassing you as the world's foremost forensic anthropologist
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: I applaud your ambition, Dr. Wells, but being the best in your field requires more than the accumulation of hours
- Dr. Oliver Wells: Well, I'm also a genius with a 160 IQ, so I think I'm okay
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: Perhaps, but I'd temper yourself. The likelihood of you being as good as I am is very remote
- Dr. Oliver Wells: Oh no, not "as good as", "better than"
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: I believe the expression is: "bring it on over", Dr. Wells
- Dr. Oliver Wells: No, the expression is: "bring it on". There is no "over". But, okay
- Dr. Camille Saroyan: [Looking in her microscope] Dr. Wells! What can I do for you?
- Dr. Jack Hodgins: Seriously?
- Dr. Camille Saroyan: [Looks up] Oh, sorry! I just saw the curly hair, beard, lab coat...
- Dr. Jack Hodgins: Both brilliant, of course. Me a little more so
- Christine Booth: Good night, jackass.
- Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan: I beg your pardon?
- Christine Booth: I said good night, jackass.
- Seeley Booth: Don't look at me. You told me not to say anything.