The Angry Video Game Nerd (TV Series)

E.T. Atari 2600 (2014)

James Rolfe: The Angry Video Game Nerd

Quotes 

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : So, is it really the worst game of all time? Umm... I don't think so. It's frustrating, it's challenging, and it's a brainteaser, but that's what makes it so addicting and considering it was made in such a short period of time, it's more sophisticated than anything of its' era. Raiders of the Lost Ark was just as strange and cryptic and that game was met with glowing praise. Both of these games came with instruction manuals. Now I can understand kids just wanting to pick up a game and enjoy it without having to read anything, but if you could understand Raiders, you could understand E.T. So what was it that gave this game such a reputation? I can't answer that. It's just something that happened, it's something we needed. Is there something mystical about the game?

  [the Nerd nods] 

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : There is. It's a floor plan to Area 51 as well as an access key and every cartridge contained a piece of the alien ship. Sure, but, forget about all of that. The mystical thing about all these old craptastic games is that they somehow hold a place in our hearts and bring us back to that special time when we were kids, and that's the power of the classics and the not-so classics that we love to hate.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : E.T. on Atari 2600. To begin with, its not a game you just pick up and play. Most games this generation were very simple. Shoot a bunch of aliens, climb to the top of the screen, stop missiles or chomp down all the pellets, but E.T. is an enigma. With all these random symbols appearing at the top of the screen and falling in holes all the time, it's no wonder why gamers did not understand how to play this game. You have to read the instruction manual. So, once you understand how to play the game... IT STILL FUCKING SUCKS!

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : All these zones, and the phone pieces, everything, they're always hidden in a different spot every time you start the game. Some have spoken out in defense of this game, saying that it's different every time you play it. Kinda like how every time I take a shit, it's always different.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : FUCK! How come they can pass over a hole and you can't? Yeah, yeah, go ahead, pass over the hole again, yeah fuck you. I'm gonna pass over your mom's hole. Even if you find the pieces, it's worth jack and shit, and Jack left town.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : There's a way to catch yourself before you fall down, but you'll never be expecting it when you fall. Oh, look! Shit! The human brain can't react that fast. I don't know who can pull off that trick? Maybe ninjas that take speed and sit around play Atari all day.