Conan (TV Series)

Dr. Phil McGraw/Joshua Jackson/Phox (2014)

Conan O'Brien: Self - Host

Photos 

Quotes 

• Conan O'Brien : Now, if you don't mind, Punxsutawney Dr. Phil, do you have any advice for our studio audience tonight?

  Punxsutawney Dr. Phil : You're young, you're beautiful, you're intelligent, you're vibrant. You have all of these things. And you have to decide that you are lovable. You have to decide that you are acceptable.

  Conan O'Brien : Okay. Now, Dr. Phil, I wanna know, what did you think of that advice?

  Dr. Phil : Well, I think that is a... cheap, crappy puppet, and I think he's rippin' me off, that's what I think.

  Conan O'Brien : You think he's ripping you off?

  Dr. Phil : I think he's rippin' me off!

  Conan O'Brien : Dr. Phil, does that puppet make you angry?

  Dr. Phil : It makes me VERY angry, to tell you the truth! I don't mind tellin' ya.

  Punxsutawney Dr. Phil : I will help you with your anger, I will offer to get you professional help with those issues.

  Conan O'Brien : That's, good, yeah. What do you think?

  Dr. Phil : What do I think?

  Conan O'Brien : Yeah.

  Dr. Phil : I'm not takin' advice from a stupid groundhog puppet, that's what I think.

  Punxsutawney Dr. Phil : What you need to do is hire a hooker, wear more jewelry, wear tight, short dresses, and just look like Beyonce.

  [audience laughter] 

  Dr. Phil : That is stupid advice, I am not going to do that.

  Punxsutawney Dr. Phil : Then I will kill you.

  Dr. Phil : What did you say to me?

  Punxsutawney Dr. Phil : [brandishing a switchblade]  I, will, kill, you.

  Dr. Phil : [pulling out a Bowie knife]  You wanna dance, muskrat? Let's dance!

  Punxsutawney Dr. Phil : See ya next time.

  [goes back in his hole; Dr. Phil smacks the Bowie knife on Conan's desk] 

  Conan O'Brien : [laughs]  You win, Dr. Phil! You're an amazing sport.