- Chloe Decker: Finally some rain. Maybe someone up there is looking out for us.
- Lucifer Morningstar: I can assure you He's in no way meteorologically-inclined. Apart from the whole Noah thing and that was a one-off.
- [to Ty]
- Lucifer Morningstar: I've met your type before, so desperate to control their lives, they forget to enjoy it.
- Lucifer Morningstar: What do you want?
- Ty Huntley: [looking at Ali] Her.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Well, then "carpe diem," my friend.
- Lucifer Morningstar: [a whimpering man is held prisoner, his head covered, as Lucifer and Maze come down the stairs] Finally ! The would-be Prince of Darkness.
- Ronnie: Payment due upon delivery.
- Lucifer Morningstar: I'd like to examine the goods first.
- Ronnie: Your dime.
- Lucifer Morningstar: [turning around the man] Right. Let's see the face of my impostor.
- [Maze uncovers the man's head]
- Mazikeen: [laughs] The resemblance is uncanny.
- Lucifer Morningstar: It most certainly is not.
- [Maze giggles]
- Lucifer Morningstar: How could anyone think that you were me ?
- The Would-Be Prince of Darkness: [with a fake british accent, trying to sound assured] You know who you're messing with ? I'm Lucifer freaking Morningstar !
- Lucifer Morningstar: [faking surprise] Oh ! Are you now ?
- [first lines]
- Lucifer Morningstar: [behind woman on building ledge] Go on. Go ahead, jump. You know you want to. Hmm? Trust me, it's a warm welcome.
- Young Woman: Won't it hurt?
- Lucifer Morningstar: Oh, there's only one way to find out...
- Linda Martin: Of all the cities in the world, Lucifer, why did you decide to come to Los Angeles?
- Lucifer Morningstar: Well, the same reason as everyone else. Uh, the weather, porn stars, Mexican food... mm!
- Linda Martin: You know, you say... you say people are phony here, but I think people come here to reinvent themselves. And I think that's why you're here. To reinvent yourself.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Why would I mess with perfection?
- Lucifer Morningstar: I decided to make myself useful.
- Chloe Decker: You call watching porn on your phone useful?
- Lucifer Morningstar: This isn't my phone, Detective. I think it's our recently departed's.
- Chloe Decker: Where did you get this?
- Lucifer Morningstar: Just heard a ringy-ding and followed the noise.
- Dan: What happened to the plan?
- Lucifer Morningstar: I made a better one.
- Chloe Dancer: How?
- Lucifer Morningstar: Just sit tight and we'll all get what we want.
- Chloe Dancer: 250 guests. You know what that means.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Great party.
- Chloe Dancer: 250 suspects.
- Linda Martin: I think people come here to reinvent themselves, and that's why I think you're here. To reinvent yourself.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Why would I mess with perfection?
- Chloe Dancer: Finally, some rain. Maybe someone up there is looking out for us.
- Lucifer Morningstar: I can assure you, he's in no way meteorologically inclined. Apart from the whole Noah thing, and that was a one-off.
- Lucifer Morningstar: Ah, hello again, my little cannonball. Sorry, I didn't introduce myself earlier. Lucifer. Morningstar.
- Young Woman: Seriously?
- Lucifer Morningstar: Yes, yes. I'm the Devil, hope you'll hold it against me.
- Young Woman: Lucifer Morningstar, the guy who owns Lux?
- Lucifer Morningstar: That's me.
- Young Woman: [laughing] No, it's not. I've seen him before. His beats are sick.
- Lucifer Morningstar: [he's taken aback] I very much beg your pardon. Beats?
- Young Woman: Yeah. He performed at a rap battle last week in the Valley.
- Lucifer Morningstar: [offended] Every single part of that sentence horrifies me.
- Young Woman: It is so gross that you're pretending to be someone you're not.
- Lucifer Morningstar: [in disbelief] Uh!
- Young Woman: [walking away] Even your accent is fake.
- Trixie Espinoza: Are you doing homework?
- Chloe Dancer: Um, sort of.
- Trixie Espinoza: What's the assignment?
- Chloe Dancer: Uh, well, I saw Lucifer do some things I can't explain
- Trixie Espinoza: Is Lucifer a magician?
- Chloe Dancer: That's sort of what I'm trying to figure out.
- Lucifer Morningstar: So, Detective, looks like you've solved another case because of me.
- Chloe Decker: I solved this case despite you.
- Chloe Decker: I know how this goes. Ali's a young actress looking for a break, an agent promises to help her out, and in exchange she's treated like a party favor to your star clients.