Whose Line Is It Anyway? (TV Series)

Keegan-Michael Key 5 (2015)

Colin Mochrie: Self

Quotes 

• Aisha Tyler : [in "Scenes from a Hat"]  "If drill sergeants did other jobs."

  Keegan-Michael Key : [shouting]  All right, it's nap time!

  Ryan Stiles : [shouting]  Keep your voices down! This is the library!

  Colin Mochrie : [shouting]  Aah! We'll do some mime where I walk against the wind! Then, I will walk a dog that isn't there! This is me doing it!

  Keegan-Michael Key : [shouting]  And why do you THINK you feel that way? Could it because of what your mother did when you were a child?

  Wayne Brady : [shouting]  All right, push! Push! Push! Left, righty left, righty, push! Left, righty, bring it on down, sound off, push that baby, there's a head, bring it on down,

  [audience starts clapping to the beat] 

  Wayne Brady : crowning, hoop, it's head, bringing its head in my arms, snip that cord, wrap it up,

  [mimes slapping] 

  Wayne Brady : whaa, it's a baby boy!

  [audience cheers as Wayne walks off stage] 

• Ryan Stiles : [in "Hats"] 

  [wearing a bird mask] 

  Ryan Stiles : Wanna get laid?

  Wayne Brady : [wearing a diving helmet]  It's cool, baby. I'll go down.

  Colin Mochrie : [wearing a genie hat]  I will grant your wish. Just rub it three times.

  Keegan-Michael Key : [wearing a graduation cap]  Now I'm old enough, Mrs. Reynolds.

  Ryan Stiles : [wearing a Frosty the Snowman hat]  I'm easy to make, you just roll some balls around until I get bigger.

  Wayne Brady : [wearing a wizard hat]  That's right, baby. They call me "Black Magic".

  Colin Mochrie : [wearing a dinosaur mask]  If you don't do me, I'll be extinct! I can't see or hear anything except the sound of my own voice!

  Keegan-Michael Key : [wearing a masquerade mask]  So basically, you have two options.

  [turns his head to the side, revealing the long nose on the mask] 

  Ryan Stiles : [wearing a pilot cap]  On this flight, there's only ONE exit in the rear.

  Wayne Brady : [wearing a necklace of onions]  It's gonna make you cry.

  Ryan Stiles : [wearing a scarecrow hat, holding arms out]  I'm well hung.

  Keegan-Michael Key : [wearing a vulture hat]  No- no big deal, I'm just gonna... circle around until you fall down.

  Colin Mochrie : [wearing a golf green hat]  I can get in the hole under five.

  Wayne Brady : [wearing a colonial hat]  The British are coming. The British are coming.

  Ryan Stiles : [holding a mask]  There's nothing like a little head.

  Keegan-Michael Key : [wearing a fur hat]  If you let me, I'll Putin.

  Ryan Stiles : [wearing a Dr. Seuss hat]  To your life, you will add some spice, making love to me will be real nice. I'll fondle your boobs, I'll fondle your butt, afterwards, I'll call you a slut.

• Ryan Stiles : [in "Whose Line", an Indiana Jones scene]  Would it help if I said...

  [pulls out pre-written note] 

  Ryan Stiles : well, that's just my name.

  [throws note away] 

  Ryan Stiles : "Ryan"? Would it help if I said "Ryan"?

  Colin Mochrie : No, it wouldn't. Believe me, that would kill the desire right there!