- Tiffany 'Pennsatucky' Doggett: Do you know the difference between pain and suffering?
- Big Boo: Oh, I can't wait to hear this.
- Tiffany 'Pennsatucky' Doggett: Yeah, well, you should hear it because pain is something that... Pain is always there because life is freaking painful, okay. But suffering is a choice. And you my friend, it's not my right to say, but you're suffering.
- Poussey Washington: We're gonna need jobs.
- Brook Soso: We'll just search jobs for former inmates on the interweb. You know, piece of cake. I'll just shovel shit and you'll dig graves.
- Alex Vause: They cancelled construction and grounds crew because of the active crime scene. So, snow day for us.
- Piper Chapman: A murder day.
- Alex Vause: Yeah, well, that branding never took off in the same way.
- [scoffs]
- Gina Murphy: You know, Sherlock's brother, Mycroft, has a brain like a computer.
- Lorna Morello: Oh, cute. I think you mean Microsoft.
- Joe Caputo: Even if you're the city now, one day you'll be the monster. Working here changes who you are.
- Tasha 'Taystee' Jefferson: Why the sudden all you bitches want to murder folk like it's a new fall trend or some shit?
- Chief Ferguson: You're gonna have to save it for the judge, son. Or, I hear the murderers and rapists over in County are great listeners, especially when it comes to soft, young boys. It's like therapy, but with more sodomy.
- Stephanie Hapakuka: I'm representing the Others.
- Kasey Sankey: Like on "Lost"?
- Tasha 'Taystee' Jefferson: No, like the brown people who aren't really brown.
- Kasey Sankey: Oh, like yellow.
- Stephanie Hapakuka: Are you for real?
- Judy King: You know with all that yoga she supposedly does, she is not all that flexible. Couldn't get her foot behind her head.