- Self - Guest: [reading a Mean Tweet] Robert De Niro looks like a wrinkled potato.
- Self - Guest: [to the camera] Fuck you. What kind of infantile humor is this?
- Self - Guest: [reading a Mean Tweet] Robert De Niro is too old to be making gangsta movies still. Dude needs to start playing grandfather roles or something.
- Self - Guest: [to the camera] Yeah, I am playing grandfather roles. And pretty soon I'll be playing great-grandfather roles. So fuck you!
- Self - Guest: [reading a Mean Tweet] Robert De Niro is not a Good Fella. He is a POS.
- Self - Guest: [to the camera] Piece Of Shit. You know what you can do? You can suck my cock! You fucking scumbag! Happy?
- Self - Guest: [reading a Mean Tweet] Welcome to my class on imitating Robert De Niro. The first step is to always contort your face like you heard your Grandma fart. Good
- Self - Guest: [to the camera] Good what? Is this all you have to do in your life? To write this, whoever wrote this?
- Self - Guest: [reading a Mean Tweet] There are now two things visible from space: The Great Wall of China and Robert De Niro's mole.
- Self - Guest: [to the camera] Ha ha ha. Who does this? Who are you, some fucking little 15 year old? You nothing better to do in your life?
- Self - Guest: [reading a Mean Tweet] Robert De Niro, eat shit and die you worthless piece of shit.
- Self - Guest: [to the camera] YOU eat shit and die YOU fucking worthless piece of shit! Because you probably ARE a worthless piece of shit. And you feel that way about you, yourself. So fuck you!
- Self - Guest: [reading a Mean Tweet] My nana's broken her nose and now she looks like Robert De Niro. Such a shame.
- Self - Guest: [to the camera] Fuck you.