- Karen Walker: I thought long and hard about how to help you come out to Crystal.
- Beverley Leslie: What on Earth are you talking about?
- Karen Walker: The secret you told me when you were guzzling morphine - like a little hamster.
- Beverley Leslie: What exactly did I tell you?
- Karen Walker: That you like Ding Dongs more than Ho Hos. That you gobble more hot dogs than a Japanese competitive eater. That you've been ridden by more bears than a tricycle in a Russian circus. Pip-posterius.
- Beverley Leslie: Me, a homosexual? The very idea makes me howl with manly laughter.
- [high-pitched laugh]