Himself - Host: I'm glad you're in a good mood. Let's get right to the disasters.
[audience laughter]
Himself - Host: Oh, jeez, right? I mean, Puerto Rico, Las Vegas, Donald Trump.
[laughter]
Himself - Host: We had a rough week. And he does not make it better. You know, you've heard that term, uh, first responders? He... he's got a new thing: worst responder.
[laughter]
Himself - Host: He is the wor... he finally went to Puerto Rico, uh, a week after the storm. He said it... he would have come earlier, except his hairdresser told him it was too dangerous.
[laughter]
Himself - Host: Uh... you don't want the wind in that thing. But...
[laughter and applause]
Himself - Host: And he lands... lands on the island like Ponce de Leon, and, you know, the natives immediately said "Can we have the hurricane back?".