Roseanne (TV Series)
Twenty Years to Life (2018)
John Goodman: Dan Conner
Photos
Quotes
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Roseanne Conner : Dan? Dan? Dan!
Dan Conner : [jolts awake] What? What happened?
Roseanne Conner : I thought you were dead.
Dan Conner : I was sleeping. Why does everybody always think I'm dead?
Roseanne Conner : You looked happy. I thought maybe you moved on.
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Dan Conner : [finds Roseanne's old book] Well, looky here! "Written by Roseanne Conner."
Roseanne Conner : Oh, trash that.
Dan Conner : This would've sold like hot cakes if only you hadn't killed off the most interesting character.
[puts his arms around Roseanne]
Dan Conner : He was a gentle giant.
Roseanne Conner : [chuckles] You know what really would've helped, though? More bondage and a wizard school.
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Roseanne Conner : Did you get the anti-depressants?
Dan Conner : They're all yours. If you're not happy, I have no chance of being happy.
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Dan Conner : Why does everyone always think I'm dead?
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Roseanne Conner : Well, I don't want her selling off our grandkids, either, Dan. But, you know, if there's one thing we learned about Becky is we can't tell her what to do. 'Cause then, she'll just go do the exact opposite. I mean, remember we told her not to get married?
Dan Conner : She got married.
Roseanne Conner : Remember, we told her not to get that Marky Mark and The Funky Bunch tattoo?
Dan Conner : She got the tattoo.
Roseanne Conner : Yeah, and we told her she had to finish high school, so she didn't finish high school?
Dan Conner : She didn't finish high school?
Roseanne Conner : You miss a lot of stuff when you're out drinking in the garage, Dan.
Dan Conner : [scoffs] That's the whole point!
