- Hope Mikaelson: [after Lizzie volunteers as tribute] She battles one gargoyle, and suddenly she's Mother Theresa.
- Alaric Saltzman: [sparring with Hope, after she also volunteered] Who are you, and what have you done with Hope Mikaelson?
- [grunts as he struggles to keep up]
- Hope Mikaelson: I never got to go to a real school. I've always wanted to see what it's like to be normal for a day instead of being a tri-brid loner.
- Alaric Saltzman: Yeah, well, that's a bed you made for yourself.
- Hope Mikaelson: Not looking for a social lecture!
- Milton 'MG' Greasley: Tell me where Dana and Sasha are, and we'll get out of your hair.
- Lizzie Saltzman: More like split ends.
- Jill: Shut up, Saltzman. And why are you all up in their business? Are all of you private school kids this creepy?
- Lizzie Saltzman: [after Jill left] Compulsion fail! Hope's probably doing a victory lap by now. What's with the performance anxiety?
- Milton 'MG' Greasley: I think you're distracting me.
- Lizzie Saltzman: I'm wearing polyester.
- Milton 'MG' Greasley: And you're totally pulling it off.
- Lizzie Saltzman: [sighs] Get your head in the *game*, MG.
- [Milton's cellphone rings]
- Lizzie Saltzman: You have the school phone?
- [disgusted:]
- Lizzie Saltzman: Where were you keeping it?
- Lizzie Saltzman: [as Dana pukes, literally spilling her guts] I think her *soul* just got on my shoes. Eww!