Morlock-2 Reviews

X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

Brett Ratner instead of Bryan Singer. Alarming. Very.

[7/10 · 26 May 2006]

Brett Ratner instead of Bryan Singer. Alarming. Very. Brett Ratner is a guy who copies other directors' styles and makes mediocre movies (read "Red Dragon", where he copied Jonathan Demme and gave the film a generous portion of Ridley Scott). I didn't hate "Red Dragon", it just was what it was. Mediocre at best.

He entered the project a year and a half ago, to replace Bryan Singer. Zak Penn and Simon Kinberg wrote a script in zero time that seems to work just fine. And that's pretty much what Ratner puts up there on the screen: a movie that works just fine. Let's not get too enthusiastic.

On the flip-side we've got some of the performances. Of course, Halle Berry, is just a crashing bore. Her character Storm plans to take over after Charles Xavier (Patrick Stewart). This is a complete miscalculation by the filmmakers, as nobody really likes Storm. Storm's prominent role in the series has to do with Halle Berry's (undeserved) star status.

Some of the mutants in the Brotherhood are really colorless, but I guess that's bound to happen as they are the villain's henchmen (and the movie only has 104 minutes at its disposal). In the first movie Singer used a couple of villains that worked great. In Penn and Kinberg's script there's a little too much going on, and too many characters - and so little time. I guess that's what happens when the production team has got 14 months to make a worthy sequel. They do succeed though - kind of. But they do not excel.

The Da Vinci Code (2006)

This truly is a movie version of what I imagined as I read Dan Brown's best-seller; for good and bad.

[7/10 · 22 May 2006]

The Da Vinci Code Critics have been complaining about the pacing in "The Da Vinci Code." Dull, I've heard. But I have to say that it's quite entertaining despite its running time - approximately 148 minutes.

This truly is a movie version of what I imagined as I read Dan Brown's best-seller; for good and bad. Hence, if you liked what you read... I'm still amused by the fact that people around me took Brown's novel seriously. People who usually are skeptics believed some of the stuff because Brown blurred the line between fact and fiction. I want this stuff to be true, and the world would be a more interesting place if it were. But it's a cock-and-bull story if there ever was one. That becomes even more evident as we see the movie. This is a more straight-faced version of Indiana Jones. Dr. Jones for the ones who consider themselves too old for the archeologist's adventures.

As I see the film I sense that this is an architectural construction; it's lifeless and the people involved made it for the money. Still it's useful for entertainment. These actors, who are otherwise great at what they do, hold back and you can practically see dollar signs in their eyes. Ian McKellen can do this stuff in his sleep, Tom Hanks has acknowledged that he made it for the money, Jean Reno literally sleepwalks as Captain Fache; the acting is competent, but these guys don't seem the least bit hungry.

"The Da Vinci Code" is good entertainment. Even though I know all the twists and turns beforehand, and despite the lack of passion from the cast and crew.

THREE STARS *** Note: The newspaper article with the picture of Sophie Neveus family before the car crash... is the brother Clint Howard? Sure looked like his ugly face.

The Big Lebowski (1998)

He's the ultimate Dude.

[10/10 · 14 March 2002]

Wouldn't it be great to see a sequel to THE BIG LEBOWSKI. We could revisit Walter and Jeffrey's L.A. However, there would be no Donny... I didn't like seeing Donny go. The Coens could make a Lebowski that sets in today, instead of the 90ies. Hope the Dude still obides.

Kung Pow: Enter the Fist (2002)

That's entertainment!

[7/10 · 10 February 2002]

KUNG POW surprised me a lot. I had used KUNG POW as an example of bad movies that recently have been made by the large studios. But this film is funny 70% of its running time which is pretty good for a movie like this. It is so silly that it is impossible to stop laughing. They make fun of the bad sound in Hongkong movies and some of the voices and SFX in the film are hilarious. For instance, a dog who barks and we hear the sound 2 seconds later.

If you want to laugh, check out KUNG POW: ENTER THE FIST.

Brotherhood of the Wolf (2001)

Don't take BROTHERHOOD OF THE WOLF too seriously. Have fun.

[13 January 2002]

"Brotherhood of the Wolf" is a film that is misunderstood by many critics. They take it too seriously. But I am pretty sure that the makers had a good laugh when they made the film. They wanted to make an entertaining film... and they sure accomplished that. 140 minutes of entertainment... and the weirdest thing is that it has several sub plots that would be really dull if they were in another movie... but here they work well.

I used to giggle every time I heard the name Christophe Gans... but now I actually believe that the man can make a helluva flick. I even respect Mark Dacascos a bit more. I've always made fun of him... I used to laugh when people said that "Crying Freeman" was a good film (It sucks ass by the way).

Naken (2000)

A Real Stinkbomb

[1/10 · 26 July 2001]

I couldn't believe my eyes when I read the comments on "Naken." They were VERY positive. Then I realised that they must be written by the filmmakers themselves and friends to the filmmakers.

I happened to see this turd for movie... and comparing it to "Groundhog Day" is nothing but a sin.

I don't feel like writing an extended review on the film... because I feel that it would be a waste of time.

If you want to see a high-quality Swedish comedy... watch "Vuxna människor" and "Adam & Eva"... if you have already seen those... then I don't know what you should see... nothing Swedish anyway.

Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999 Video Game)

The closest you'll ever get to being a jedi knight.

[10/10 · 2 December 1999]

I haven't played that much games for the last 4 years cause they've all been "too much". But Star Wars Phantom Menace got me going again... I felt like a Jedi when I ran around in the worlds of George Lucas... I played constantly for a few days until I finished the game and killed Darth Maul. Hope Episode 2 comes soon... the movie wasn't all that great... but the game is a masterpiece.

End of Days (1999)

No brain but a whole lot of fun.

[6/10 · 25 November 1999]

Arnie's back! End of Days is an actionpacked supernatural thriller and it sure gives you the ride that is promised. Arnold fights satan in Predator-style. There are many plot-holes and stupid scenes. Gabriel Byrne as satan actually urinates gasoline when he's about to blow up a car. That's rather strange...but I guess Satan can do these things. I'm not saying this is a great film...but it beats the hell out of Eraser(which truly sucked). Enjoyable action-movie.