Joe-290 Reviews

Dallas: War of the Ewings (1998 TV Movie)

The worst of "Dallas"

[11 February 2003]

Unfortunately this latest and currently last installment in the "Dallas" story brings an uncertain close to a great show. Dallas never got a proper ending and a lot of things were left untold. Worst of all this show offers nothing new to the series which once was so interesting and unique. On top of this it lacks the edge of the original episodes. Theres not much nastiness from JR. Hes more of a soft hearted old man now and thats not what we want. While there is a plus to womens rights which makes the film modern Sue Ellen is not even barked at by JR. Everybody seems to be friends except for a surprise appearance from Ray Krebbs whose feelings towards JR have not changed.

To really set the record clear what makes this really terrible is the lack of cast. Never did "Dallas" have so few stars. Just Ray, JR, Bobby, Carter and Sue Ellen. Wheres the rest of the best? Miss Ellie, Clayton, the kids, Jenna, Afton, Donna and most of all Cliff Barnes. Having no Cliff Barnes in the show is like having no Starsky in "Starsky and Hutch". JR and Cliff were the strength of the show and because hes nowhere to be seen, the film flops and it did exactly that with ratings and critics.

A third reunion movie should certainly be made but with a better writer. It needs to be fast, captivating, daring, wicked and entertaining. We need a surprise. A cliffhanger just like the end of each season. Pamela Barnes should be written back in because she was also an important link between the Barnes and the Ewings. Orignally we were meant to think she died but we actually never saw her die other than stroll off into the sunset.

"Dallas: War Of The Ewings" is strictly for fans only but it only keeps you waiting for some more, something better especially since we never got a definite finish!. With a Dallas remake movie around the corner and no reunion TV movie even rumoured for 2003 (the 25th anniversary of "Dallas") things look grim. Larry Hagman was a brilliant actor and was the only person anyone could see playing JR Ewing. He still entertains here despite his softer side and its nice to see progress in Sue Ellens life as she and Bobby take hold of the reins of Ewing Oil.

Live a Little, Love a Little (1968)

The first of the last batch for Elvis

[4 November 2002]

During the making of the 1968 comeback Tv special, Presley was making a lot of changes and so was his manager. Here we get to see a new type of Elvis movie that although suited for kids has more of an adult theme than ever before. With a light hearted sexual theme and some better but fewer songs this Presley picture is better than most from his later career. After this, each of the last four films he ever did had a new slant to them that differed greatly from his early to mid 1960s movies. Nicely made with few little quiet jokes and generally good fun with a cameo from Elvis's father, Vernon. Lively entertainment thats better than Star Wars.

Elvis: The Comeback Special (1968 TV Special)

The greatest performer performs

[10/10 · 24 October 2002]

Nobody can doubt that Elvis Presley defined what performing was and here in colour we see the king return to his roots for the very last time in his life after 8 years of Hollywood. Presley lived for another 9 years but when he got into Las Vegas just after this, it was all over. Presley's Vegas period is not to be dismissed in a flash because his cabaret type concerts were so enjoyable. Vegas entertained greatly but here in 1968 immitating his 50's period Elvis contributed to music and society. This show was the main inspiration for MTV Unplugged and it pictures a raw rocking king oozing R&B, gospel and R&R. If anybody sees this and can not be amazed by this man they are missing soemthing. He defined pop culture and music because of his natural ability to get across the meaning and feeling of the songs. (Hardly anyone can do that like him). Here we see Elvis very up to date with the times with almost hard rock, looking and sounding so great. There is an amusing sketch where he jokes about his entire movie career but the scenes where he is sitting with his original band and jamming away can never be beaten. Nobody can come close to Elvis Presley and his 68 comeback special! Its phenomonel!

Elvis: That's the Way It Is (1970)

Elvis Presley is the best and he proves it here!

[8/10 · 31 December 2000]

It was a heart - pounding, pulse racing, mind blowing, fast moving, breathtaking, exhilarating, overwhelming, thrilling and exciting, sensational and tremendous, wonderful and superb show with all the TCB band playing terrific along to the one and only great Elvis Presley. Elvis' 3rd Las Vegas season since he made his live concert comeback in 1969 a year after his TV comeback.

Candid footage of Elvis behind the scenes gets you closer to this really down to earth wonderful human being and this is the real Elvis looking his best. 7 years before he died and extremely thin and fit and powerful. Dominating the film this is a great show for all people and it is certainly something to watch if you want to learn something about The one true King - Elvis Presley.

Cliffhanger (1993)

In all sense of the title!

[13 December 2000]

Sylvester Stallone returns to the die hard style action movies with one so full of suspense and tension its a cliffhanger!. Keeping you on the edge of your seat this is a better Stallone film. In his first action film since Rocky V it was great to see the action man doing what he does best instead of comedies that just didnt suit him.

Here he is a down on his luck mountain rescuer who is called in to save victims of a plane crash in the mountains but he only thing is these arent any old plane travellers buy thieves who have tried to steal large cases of cash from a federal plane in the skies. The only thing is that om taking the money from one plane to the next they lost all 3 cases and then caught up in a storm crash and have to find the money as well finding a way off the mountain.

John Lithgow is the main villain and if he doesnt get to play a James Bond bad guy, heres his best chance. Like many action movies the villain is extremely menacing. A style created by James Bond films and their villains. He plays a very interesting character and acts the part well.

This film is better than Stallones other film of the year 'Demolition Man' as the action is so good and so much better. A film that will keep anyone with a fast moving mind or life excited. Fantastic tough guy film and a film which has been considered bad and stupid but which is a tough guy film which counts as brilliant and if this is bad and stupid, I just wonder what the same people think about Star Wars as this is so many times better.

Rocky IV (1985)

The beginning of the same

[7 December 2000]

When it came to the 4th Rocky movie, it was obvious it was just another installment with nothing new or different from the previous films. The only thing was the fact Rocky was fighting a foreigner. East v's West. American against Russia. It was like a film about war.

The training scene was the toughest and strongest of all the Rocky films. The music score was brilliant. The photograpy, script and directions were just as good as always but it was just too short. It was a quick film that made a quick buck as it is the most successful of the Rocky films.

It is a gigantic step down from Rocky 3 which was a step up from Rocky 2. It is touching like every Rocky film is and thats what makes the script good. Its emotional. It has that soemthing that gets to your heart. Just beautiful. After the sadness of he death of Mickey in 3, things seem to just get worse here and this was really the beginning of the fall of the life of Rocky while the career stayed on top.

The best fight of the series and surely the toughest for Rocky ever. It is a great film from the best film series of all time. Much better than Star Wars as it has heart.

Dead Poets Society (1989)

Extremely touching emotional drama

[9/10 · 6 December 2000]

This film has it all. Its touching, its sentimental, its funny, its emotional in all ways and it has a beautiful girl. In an American private school a group of students learn about letting themselves go but in the style of poetry which their new English teacher convinces them to read to learn about themselves. They become rebelious but not to a large extent due to the bullying by the teachers and parents who are completely conservative and do not want their children to do what they want in life.

So I dont give away a scene towards the end I wont say it but it is extremely touching. For sentimentals or intelectuals. 10 out of 10 and this is what films are all about. Not Star Wars...oh yeh..its better than Star Wars BY FAR.

First Blood (1982)

Very well made interesting movie.

[10/10 · 22 January 2000]

The very first Rambo film is well under-rated. Do not let the fact that it is a Rambo movie put you off that its just a dumb action. It has such great film art in it. It was great in all ways. The script, the music score and the characters and acting. All was just great. It was not until the next film that the legendary tough guy dumb adventure film became famous.

A vietnam veteran returning from the war goes to meet his last friend but discovers that he has died too along with all his other friends in the army. Now, with no where to go, not much faith in what to do, walks to a town just to get some food, where he easily becomes an enemy with the towns sherrif. His appearence quickly annoys the cop and after a bit of ruffle, Rambo is arrested but shortly after, escapes from the local police station and goes on the hide in a forest on a mountain where a manhunt groups.

The story becomes very captivating and suspenseful with some great stunts. The deprest, loner John Rambo gives a great little comment on the events that took place in Vietnam. The disrespect from the government and people of the United States of America towards the men who were forced to go out and protect their country. A movie describing unloyal people.

In this movie, Rambo actually doesn't kill a single person while the legend of the story is that he takes on a hundred guys and kills them all at once is so untrue. It is a good movie. Great fun but serious all the same.

This is one you have to watch. A fantastic film which is many times over and over again better than Star Wars as it is set un reality and involves a captivating script. Just wonderful.

Rocky V (1990)

Not as bad as a lot of people say

[6/10 · 7 January 2000]

This movies which has to come in its title number is the fifth best of the Rocky films. It has not got the same power as the first 2 but is still very emotionally tought and strong and sends across a message like the other movies. Stallone like he always has been is great with the part. The script really does have its moments of splendour and with sadness. Scenes such as Balboas recolections on the past and his time with his friend and coach Mickey. Extremely emotional movie but of course only in scene such as that and also when his wife tries to pur across he devoted love for the boxer. Its powerfuls and tought like the whole series is.

The films are the most realistic film series based on true life. True griet. True feelings and love. Now, Rocky loses his money plus gets brain damage, just how bad can a life get. Now not been able to box becomes a coach but soon gets betrayed by his student as another promoter with more money and power takes control of him and leaves Rocky all alone with nowhere to go.

Although there is no ring fight, do not worry as there is a more personel than ever with more strenght and skill in a tough and rough and mean street fight. Definatley the least best in the series but still not bad and not as bad as what people say as it does contain all life based aspects. Very good and absolutley worth a watch more times than the very bad Star Wars.

The Simpsons (1989– )

One of the best comedies on TV

[28 December 1999]

The Simpsons is very influential. The comedy is very good and really has a great sense of sarcasim which makes a lot of fun for all ages. Homer is a lazy, beer drinking, potato watching TV most of the time but the cartoons as they go on with differnt stories have shown he is a loving, caring father and good husband from time to time. This makes the shows sad, funny and true. Bart, the little brat getting up to mischief all the time is just the typical 10 years old boy and Lisa, is the intelligent one. Marge is a normal house wife and a good mother. Homer really is the typical American man. Even the cartoon series 'King of the Hill' shows what the average American man is like. His hatred towards his holy, god worshiping neighbour, Ned Flanders.

The series has everything, its just good fun, mainly for young people. However not every show is good but over all 88% of the series is great. Absolutely tremendous.

Elvis and the Colonel: The Untold Story (1993 TV Movie)

The worst of all Elvis documentaries

[19 December 1999]

This film is just so much nothing like Elvis and the legend at all. Everything is wrong with it. There is nothing in it which is right. Its more like 'Elvis + The Colonel: The untrue story'.

First of all. The idea of a ghost of Elvis appearing and narrating makes the show pathetic. Plus, Rob Youngblood looks nothing like Elvis either. A weird face with weird eyes and weird jaw- bones. Nothing like Elvis with extremely thick side-burns which are obviously just bits of fur stuck on. They were just too big that nobody would have grown them or would have been able to grow. The appearence and attitude of this portrail was nothing like Presley.

Then there was a replica of the house 'Graceland', that was so much unlike the actual house. The grave also, was quite different with thick writing of Elvis' name. Then there was also a rectangular swimming pool which Elvis never had. The hair style was very unlike Elvis'. Just too much hair and not combed right either. The hair styling was bad.

Vernon Presley portrail [ Elvis' father ] was nothing like the actual man either. He was just a total different appearence. Nothing the same and no attempt on making the actor look like Vernon. Gladys was slightly like the real mother of Elvis but not very close. Colonel Tom Parer played by Beau Bridges was probably the only thing that came close to the truth in the movie but still was not absolutely great.

Many actions that commence in this movie were distorted and untrue such as Elvis giving his mother a pink cadillac car when they were at graceland. Elvis gave his mother that car in 1956 when he had never even thought of having the mansion.

In this movie Elvis was ment to have done his 68 Comeback special live when he didnt. He had done it 6 months in advance. Elvis' appearence didnt change through the 50s to the 60s. Nothing changed. Also, Parker was also for the idea of a comeback in this movie but really he hated the idea.

The actor to play Elvis didnt even sound like Presley. It was just too much of a bad attempt from a bad impersonator. With just a deep southern American accent and no special tone which Elvis really did have.

Colonel Tom Parker also in real life discovered Elvis at an open air concert but in this it was just in a night club.

In this bad show and waste of money Elvis got fat in 1973 but Elvis never got fat until a bout 1 year before he died in 1977. There was also a scene which was ment to be in the 50s with Elvis getting out of his film trailer in the costumes to the movie 'Change of Habit' which was made in 1969.

Another fault included, Colonel Tom Parker telling Elvis that he could leave Hollywood when he wanted but it was the other way around. Colonel wanted to stay and Elvis wanted to leave. Plus, in the movie, the actor to play Elvis' hair stylist was nothing like the actual hair stylist with a beard and weird clothes.

The list of faults just goes on and on and on. It was a total amateurally made film which should of not been made at all. It was just awful. If there is a movie to be made on the theme of the nice guy Elvis and The Colonel it should of been made by Elvis historians. Not by someone who knew nothing about The King. The script must have been just written by a 9 year old who had to do a school project but got bits and parts of the facts. Nothing is right in the film.

Besides all this. All the facts been wrong and the movie been totally incorrect, the acting was just horrid from everyone besides Beau Bridges. The acting, the script, the photography and directions were all bad. Nothing was right. It was a total mistake making this movie.

In brief, the major untold story is largely incorrect. Although Bridges really does give a decent perfromance as the batering, carnival huckster, the poorly written Elvis role becomes even more preposterous when the ghost of Elvis appears and speaks in the film. Totally and absolutely and without a doubt not recmmended.

The World Is Not Enough (1999)

James Bond is back and just like never before!

[7/10 · 26 November 1999]

The world is not enough is the greatest Bond film out of the last 3. It totally chews up Goldeneye and definitely Tomorrow never dies. It has everything. It is fast, funny and furious. There is a great sense of humour. Probably the funniest Bond movie of all. It is extremely sexually explicit and sexually active. It is more sexual than any other Bond movie and really points in the direction of the novels. This film has everything you can want in a film. Humour, sex, violence, romance, action, suspense, tension, adventure and drama. There is more acting in this film. The sets are the most exotic and beautiful locations to enter a 007 film in years.

Many sad and interested things commence. Shocking actions and it has absolute suspense. It is ultimate Bond. It starts off with action and then procrastination sets in but this procrastination is not boring as it is showing great acting and letting you know the amazing, original and complex story-line and plot. The actions scene are the best I've seen and of course like usual the James Bond films show again they are the greatest action films ever. Starting off witha stunt that most action movies end with.

Bond wears glamorous clothes and so does Sophie. The bedrooms and houses and casino are all beautifully designed and the villains are the most vicious yet. The makers of this film really learned how bad 'Tomorrow never dies' was so they really made up for it with this. The boat chase was excellent, nothing like it has ever entered movies before. This filmalso has the largest set ever made in the history of film. The gadgets are good. The girls are sexy. The scenery is beautiful. It is total glmaour. Absolutley glamorous and is a true Bond film. It is really made up with the special Bond formula.

The first scenes in the opening sequence is the longest opening ever for 007 with a toal 15 minutes until you hear garbage lash out with their sentual song of the title. The music score is great with terrific suspense and a great sense of action. Brilliant.

It is a fabulous movie which everyone should watch. It is for everyone. Wondeful fun which suddenly turns to roughness and toughness. Insanity from the bad guy makes the film a lot better than the last. An awful cruel and ugly character. It is tremendous.

Underwater scenes, skiing scenes, action scenes with helicopters and piles and piles of bullets. Many girls brighten up the screen and now Bond has x-ray glasses. Its bond nad beyond. New ideas and very differnet to all the other Bond films. It really stand out as a great film, not just when it comes to Bond films but with all types of films. Bond is the best. No one can match him. The world is not enough and you cant get enough excitement out of you after seeing it.

I give this film 10 out of 10. It is just phenomonal. wow!, the only vocab you'll encounter after it. Look out for the disastrous incident with the BMW Z8. One to definitely watch. Dont miss it. It is ten times better than Star Wars and a lot more intelligent too. It is amazing. I just cant stop saying how amazing it is and this will happen to you too. The fun and aventure and excitment and feeling of action will stay for a long time. Dont just watch it once but watch it twice or three times. Its the best action Bond film ever. It is just like never before. James Bond is back and I cant wait till he is back again in 2 years time.

Live and Let Die (1973)

The first Roger Moore Bond film and very good.

[25 October 1999]

This movie is amazing. It was fabulous. The boat chase, the island surrounded by alligators. The action was very good too. The coffin that lifts up people and the tombstone plus the underground cave and the shark swimming pool. It was very good a movie. The bad guy was terrific and the Bond girl was beautiful but in this film out of all the Bond films 007 didn't have to do much to get the woman and seduce here. Besides that though it really is a great movie with some great and exotic locations.

Dr. No (1962)

The first of the most phenomenol films ever.

[10/10 · 25 October 1999]

Dr. No is the first of the Bond movies which started off all the great action films. Many movies have immatated this for its exotic locations beautiful women and its main character surviving some of the most dangerous actions ever. James Bond movies have so much to offer and you never waste your money on them. They are very realistic in certain areas. Not with plot but with style and a number of settings. Such as MI-6. The films give you a look at the business of the secret service.

In this movie James Bond with all its splendour such as casinos, locations, women goes after the evil Doctor No for his crimes of murder and to stop him from his most extraordinary and evil plan.

These movies also have a lot of womanising which just about every movie has today. Action films whit not over dose of what may be called cheesy action films.

The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

Truely a magnificent motion picture.

[7/10 · 20 October 1999]

The makers of this film have proved that in the last 20 years the true meaning of film has not been lost. This film was terrifc. It was amazing. It was the best script I ever heard. A true master-piece. The acting was great. The film involved so much. Anger, hate, love, friendship, hope, sadness, happiness, freedom and it dealt with all emotions. It was truely a magnificent motion picture. The film gives off true feelings of life. True emotions. The sadness and loneliness in life.

The film tells you that hope is not sometime that is good and this is so true. The script tells you another part of life. It has a happy ending but it goes through all the parts of life. It is a movie based on life. It is all about life. To be free.

The story is a man who is wrongly accused for a crime he did not commit and sent to jail where he meets a man who guides and helps him along the way.

I give this film 10 OUT OF 10. It is absolutley brilliant.

The Untouchables (1987)

An amazing film documentary of Al Capone.

[19 October 1999]

This film was just great. Kevin Costner, although not a great actor and not great in this either he does do his best in this. Sean Connery like always is brilliant but seems to play the same character all the time coming up with all the great ideas and the great things to say and always been right. I really do reccomend this film. It was very good, interesting, powerful movie and portrail of 1930 when Al Capone was scaring Chicago. It was very captivating. Robert DeNiro was great as the bad guy and played gim well but plays the same character over agin just like Connery. This film was emotional and had everything and was a lot better than Star Wars.

Flaming Star (1960)

The most realistic Elvis film

[8/10 · 14 October 1999]

Elvis Presley in one of his best. This is a proper movie and not a light hearted romp with lots of songs. Elvis is the great actor again fighting for his family and which rase to chose as he he is mixed between white man from his father and red indian from his mother.

This is a great movie - watch it

G.I. Blues (1960)

Elvis rocks the tank

[9 October 1999]

Elvis rocks the peace time army and breaks through the defences of a hard hearted cabaret dancer in a fictionalised musical version of his own military service. Tulsa (played by Presley), Rick and Cooky ,three army buddies spend most of their off - duty time together. When they are not playing music as a combo, they are frequently at their favourite nightclub. The main attraction is a red head dancer named Lili. Many have tried to melt this beautiful icicle but have failed. Rick and Cooky bet that Tulsa will succeed where all others have failed.