Change Your Image
ecwagner
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Reviews
Firestarter (2022)
Why would they do this to a 1980's King Story???
This movie has all of the characters from Stephen Kings original story. (One character was a combination of a cab driver and a kindly old couple).
Outside of that, there was not a coherent story; an ending no where near where SK ended his story (illogical ending); terrible acting. No stars stands out here. They are all equally collecting a cheap payday.
This movie is bad by itself. It's a terrible adaptation of Stephen King's Firestarter.
Watch the Drew Barrymore version. Both the story and CGI are much better.
Haywire (2011)
Go see something else.
To say that this movie sucked would be an insult to movies that suck.
After watching the trailer and seeing some of the big named stars in this movie(Channing Tatum, Michael Douglas, Antonio Banderas, Michael Fassbender, and Ewan McGregor) I became excited with the idea of a great action film with the possibility of many sequels. The movie trailer was action packed; Gina Carano appeared to be the perfect combination of beautiful and bad ass; and a Google search only enforced this perception. I saw this movie as a good entertainment investment. After all, Rotten Tomatos gave this film an 82%. Critics stated "Haywire is a fast and spare thriller, with cleanly staged set pieces that immerse you in the action."
In just the first five minutes of the film it was easy to see that Ms Carano could not act. This left me thinking that this shouldn't be a problem since, after all, transition from fighter to action star doesn't look like it's all that easy. Chuck Norris'early attempts at acting were really, really bad, but the films themselves were enjoyable. Plus, Chuck got better over time.
Within 45 minutes of the movie's start, half the audience in the theater I was in left. Why? Well, the action was slow; the acting horrible and the plot missing until the last 10 minutes of the movie. By the time you find out what's going on, you don't care.
All things being equal, though, I think Ms Carano deserves another chance. She's new to acting, so she deserves at least one pass. On the other hand, I don't know if I want to see another Steven Soderbergh film for a while though. This isn't his first rodeo, so he should know better.
Save your money and go and see something else. I promise you'll be happier for it.
Fireproof (2008)
ABC Movie of the Week
As a child, I remember that every Tuesday afternoon, we used to gather around the old black and white TV and watch the ABC Movie of the Week. We'd treat ourselves to movies that were usually about teenage runaways, kidnap victims, abusive parents or people trying to put their marriage back together.
Well, this one takes me way down memory lane (except I don't remember paying $8.50 to see the movie of the week). With just a few changes, you could easily slip this into a 1970's TV line up with no one the wiser.
This is a story about a couple Caleb (Kurt Cameron) and Catherine (Erin Bethea) with a marriage on the rocks.
I don't want to get into the details and spoiling it for everyone that still hasn't seen it. (Take it from me, you should be able to predict how the movie turns out 15 minutes into it)
This is all I can give without 'spoiling' it for anyone:
There are three take aways from this film:
1) Mutual respect is the means to a long loving relationship.
2) Only through Jesus can someone truly understand the sacrifice of love. While this will encourage and validate the opinion of the primary crowd seeing this film, the unsaved may find it trite and more than a little bit of a turn off. Of course, it's their fault that they went to see a religious movie and didn't expect it at least once.
3) The last, and most important, plays right into an old Bible sexism - It's up to the man to fix it. - It can't be accomplished any other way. - If it's broke, the man allowed it to become broke. - If it's going to be fixed, it's a man's responsibility to fix it.
What, pray tell, do the women do? Well, since women lack responsibility - they are left to gossip, hug and cry on each other and disregard their marriage vows at the first sign of a man that "listens" to them.
If you want to watch a cheesy movie that won't strain your brain, by all means go and see it. While it's not saying much, it's the best that I've ever seen Kurt Cameron act.
I do, however, recommend that you save your $8.50 and see this when it comes on TBN or the Lifetime network. In the end, you can enjoy movie of the week quality and wonder what ever happened to Kurt Cameron's career.
Red Eye (2005)
Average Movie - Wait for the Video
This is one very predictable piece of work. If this is the best thriller out this year, then the box office take will continue its slump.
When I first read the IMDb rating of 7.1 and was a bit excited. After all, it's never led me astray. This time, I think that it failed me a bit. I was excited to see the theater filled to capacity. To me, that indicated a outstanding film. High marks and a capacity crowd!
Unfortunately, it didn't really do it. Oh, it wasn't a bad movie, but to say that it was the thriller of the year would be a stretch. It has an unoriginal plot that's been played over and over. Kidnapping - Blackmail Assassination
If you want to see it, know that most of the suspense is near the end. This part does make it better. It helps to wake you up from the first part.
Wait for the video release.
The Wedding Date (2005)
Highly Predictable **possible plot spoiler**
If you want to give your wife or girlfriend a break from shoot-em-up or horror, you could do worse. This is an OK date movie.
Don't expect a laugh riot. It does, however, have a few funny parts. The family is insane.
Is it realistic - no. It's hard to believe that a professional gigolo would allow himself to get involved with a client that easily/quickly. There was no chemistry at all. (Deuce Bigalo was much more convincing)
Is it predictable - yes. If you've seen Pretty Woman, you know how it ends. Heck, anyone with an IQ greater than 50, you know how it ends.
If you can -- just wait for video or cable.
The Grudge (2004)
Whew, there's an Hour and A Half of my Life Gone.....
Once you get used to being startled by time honored scare tactics (takes about 10 minutes into the movie), you'll have a tough time just trying to stay awake. It's slow.....scary scene......slow.....scary scene.......slow...... You get the picture.
If you are a fan of Japanese movies, then you may like this one. It has the same feeling of gloom as The Ring but without the story. You feel like you did at the end of the Blair Witch Project, wanting your money back. A lot of killing and spooking with no real plot until the last 15 minutes, then it's supposedly all explained to you. Don't blink.
2 out of 5
Catwoman (2004)
Unfair IMDB Rating for a So-So Movie
# 23 of the IMDB Bottom 100 movies of all time? Please. I've seen enough stinkers in my time to know this isn't among the top 100 of them. Although not one of the best movies you'll ever see, it's certainly far from the worst.
Because I base what I'm going to see on the reviews of IMDB, I was going to take a pass on Catwoman. After all, I've never been led astray by IMDB.
My wife, a Berry fan, wanted to see it and since I'd seen everything else that was fit to be see (per IMDB) I decided to score a few points with the Missus by going. I kept my expectation low which was the best thing I could do since the only way to go is up. After watching it, I now know why the ratings were so low. All the purist DC comic fans were upset because they expected Michelle Pfeiffer and instead got Halle Berry. (The geeks that read the comic books. I happen to be a comic geek, but I understand that the formula can't always be followed -- so I try to keep an open mind.)
Ok, ok, so it doesn't follow the Batman series created by Bob Kane. Who says it has to? It had decent action and fairly simple story. (This story doesn't take a lot of brainpower to follow). We don't have Selina Kyle, but Patience Phillips a young artist stuck in a job drawing ads for Cosmetics Company. A rather wimpy character (ala Peter Parker) She's a doormat for everyone around her. Then, she sees something that she's not supposed to. Bad guys try to take her down then, BAM - POW, an accident happens. Cat brings her back. (The resurrection of Phillips is a little lame, but, hey, this is based upon a comic book universe. Don't expect much). Now, the formally meek Phillips comes out of her 'cage' looking for revenge on the people that 'killed' her.
I didn't walk out wishing for 2 hours of my life back. It could have been much worse. Go to this movie, forget about the comic books and enjoy a fairly decent show. The kids will like it and so should the men. Of course, when you return, input an honest vote. It doesn't deserve to be a 2.7 on a 10 scale. Maybe 5.5 out of 10, but not 2.7.
The Bourne Supremacy (2004)
Great Story - Rotten Cinema
Rather than rehash what was already said I'll say this - I thought it was a great story - Tied in well with the first movie. It didn't, however, live up the first as an enjoyable movie experience.
The thing that made me want to see the sequel was the way Borne handled himself in the first movie. In a moment's notice, he would assess a situation and deal with it. Smooth, clean, and exciting hand to hand combat and a master of arms, cars, you name it.... It was fun to watch.
In the Bourne Supremacy, the same cool moves were there, but you couldn't see them. During action scenes, the camera angle was too close; scenes shifted quickly and shook violently. I came out of the movie sick from vertigo.
Story = 9 of 10 Cinematography = 4 of 10
The Matrix Revolutions (2003)
Not as fresh as the first one, but pretty good (Possible Spoilers)
Not as fresh as the first one, but pretty good. Observations (good and bad - spoilers and not)
1. Pussification of all the males in the movie:
- Geez Guys, I don't mind strong women in a movie, but come on....Morpheous just sat around doin nothing but spouting "Gee you're good" to Niobe. (His role degraded to the guy that basically sits around and says "Without Neo, we're screwed". He was the guy in the first two flicks. Come on Morp, cut the strings.)
- If Zee didn't have ole Link by the wonder wand, no one did. He's clutching a silver chain going "I'm coming home to you baby" playing with his pop pistol and she's out messing up alot of sentinel's day.
- Neo, please, why do you need Trinity to do everything? She's pulled your bacon out of the fire in all THREE MOVIES! Stand on your own.
Ok, let's make a movie where women are strong and not puss out all the guys to prove it.
2. If I had to listen to another "He's the One" speech from Morpheous, I'd barf. We all know he's the one.
3. Battle scene for Zion -- good, but way too long. There's a point where you start to cheer for the sentinels.
4. (WARNING -- SPOILER -- WARNING) Gosh, What was the point with the extended death scene for Trinity? It lasted so long that I was urging Neo to break her neck to put her out of her (and our) misery.
5. The Ending ( SPOILER ) It was the only way it could have ended. I left not liking it at first, but it made sense. Simply put: From the begining, Neo was the guy that was going to stop the war and free the humans. He did it. He created that which threatened both the humans and the machines and he used it to stop the war. Everyone is happy and life goes on (cept for Neo and Trinity)
Ok, over all, it was an above average movie. It wasn't as near as good as the first, but it was a much improved change over the second. I'm spending the money to see it again and I'm buying the DVD.. I give it 8 out of 10. (Doubters..go see it again!)
Gacy (2003)
Stinks worse than the smell coming from under Gacy's house
Rather than make a movie that goes into the mind of Gacy and examine what brought him to murder so many people, the directors instead make a movie about a serial rapist of young boys. Oh yea, somewhere in there the directors implies that Gacy may have killed some of them.
If you've seen the movie and you know nothing of Gacy, check out http://www.crimelibrary.com/serial/gacy/gacymain.htm and read up on his life. This site will fill in the blanks and answer a few questions left hanging by the movie.
If you haven't seen the movie -- Don't. Save a few bucks and go to the site and read up on him.
Charlie's Angels (2000)
Lots of Fun
Not serious...very cartoonish. But most of all, a lot of fun. The action scenes stretch the bounds of reality, but unlike Mission Impossible 2, they are supposed to. If you want a good laugh and watch a good entertaining movie, go see "Charlie's Angels".
Lost Souls (2000)
Deliver us from this Awful Movie
Hey, I like Ryder a lot. But I even have to draw the line at this pathetic attempt at entertainment. I went to this movie to enjoy suspense and horror and ended up confused by both the ending (I won't ruin it for those that might want to see it) and why I paid what I did to see it. I was scared and on the edge of my seat more in "The Little Mermaid" than I was in this turkey. Even a nude Ryder wouldn't have saved this one. I'm sorry that I waited nearly a year to see this movie. In a nutshell..it was boring, long, poorly filmed, and barely had a plot to follow. Save this one for cable, but only if there are no good re-runs on.
South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (1999)
This Movie Sucks Badly
I don't know what surprises me more - - the fact that there isn't a negative number to select for this piece of garbage or that so many people found it so good (Come on, an 8 overall?). The television show is risque and bold and it's tendency to scrape the boundaries of good taste make it a very entertaining show. The movie (all I expected was instead of the "bleeps" you'd have the actual words) doesn't just scrape the boundaries of good taste, it invades it and stakes new territory for it's own. I don't believe that there is anyone that it doesn't offend or any subject that it doesn't deem sacred. Although it has (on occasion) the quality of it's television sister, it is long drawn out and boring most times and ultimately in the end relied upon toliet humor to try and save it. Unfortunately, it didn't work. I watched the theater that I sat in decrease in size as the picture progressed from around 100 people down to a remaining 4 or 5 when the picture was finished. Avoid this piece of crap like the plague. Stick with the television show. It has much more entertainment value.