ladymoonpictures Reviews

Halloween Ends (2022)

We ALL Know: Halloween_Doesn't End Here

[5/10 · 17 October 2022]

It's impossible to judge from what you see with what actually takes place. Yes, Halloween ended. Again. Yes, Jamie has said it's over, but so did Rocky. Listen, I've loved some Halloween's better than others but always, I go. I go to see Jamie Lee Curtis. In Halloween Ends..., Jamie does not disappoint! The script didn't matter. We all knew what we came to see, as Jamie again defeated Michael Myers, but why did they push us through instead of letting the audience walk out on our own to yes, waiting for the amazing, amazing, well-written script that resurrects Michael, via lab-produced organs that are created from one stray super-stem cell from a remnant of Michael Myers DNA! I can't wait to again - see Jamie Lee Curtis - on screen in the next and perhaps very last Halloween franchise gem!

Bros (I) (2022)

Did Not Meet My Entertainment Model

[2/10 · 2 October 2022]

Didn't work. I figured it would be just another comedy, except it didn't make me laugh. It felt contrived. Forced. As if the script was meant to be instructional, enforcing, thrashing. And all of the constant pushing and pushing it became clear that comedy was not the intended motivation. There was the first introduction of our protagonist that sparked a laugh from the audience that wasn't able to maintain that. In the second act, the movie began to demonstrate some humor and that was the best part! Finally, all's well that ends well for our hero's. Or was it? In the end, it was disappointing.

Minions: The Rise of Gru (2022)

Okay, SCORE PENDING, but...

[1 July 2022]

ALL 10's?... I've not seen this yet, but I've never seen a movie that's..., NOTHIN' BUT TENS!

I laughed hysterically at the first. The second looked like a quick, 'cash cow', now this!

I'll see it later today and will bring you word.

Cry Macho (2021)

EASTWOOD is MACHO!

[10/10 · 17 September 2021]

Clint Eastwood the legend, the actor, the statesmen..., the best! I appreciate this good man, this good American. The movie industry is dying. 2-3 people per show. Let's see how Clint does tomorrow!

Jungle Cruise (2021)

A Disney Cash Cow_Going All In_FAIL

[4/10 · 1 August 2021]

It's just like the last one. Jumungii Whatever, that played at the front end of COVID for months it seemed. And it was terrible, terrible, terrible. This is Round 2 of terrible. People just aren't attending. I've had maybe a dozen for Sweetwater. Usually it's a private showing for us, whatever we see. Perfect.

A Quiet Place Part II (2020)

BAD $5 Option_CHEATS Viewers_Incongruent Cash Cow

[2/10 · 8 June 2021]

First, never mind the premise of having to be quiet, though plenty of other noises everywhere don't seem to bother the 'things', unless you, 'step on a twig' or something... wow. So bad. If you are going to zone out for two-hours..., forget the ridiculous, "A Quiet Place", as an option! Now, I know if you are even a little like me and you've already seen the few other available movie choices, and if you're feeling lucky like Columbus did, whom, as you know, did take a chance...even though he died in chains.., (that's a joke) but that's besides the point, I stray...Anyway, nearly immediately... you will not know or care who or what is going on or whom is doing what to whom or if and when they get their just rewards from the silly, creepy crawling aliens... running around and NOTHING will make sense. Just like the sentence you just read! That sums this movie up: Disjointed. Nonsensical. Uninteresting.

Since my wife and I were the only two in the first Monday showing, we got to play "MST 2000" and commentarially, we tore this laughable, foolish idea to shreds. Too many incongruent points that would prove my point but I don't want to possibly give any spoilers so I'm saying nothing except plenty about the results. Maybe this is the main thing I can say about this money cow: After leaving the theater, walking through the parking lot to the car, I considered that, "Hey, it's only $5 and some tax, so why not go to the movie and take a chance and still..., this script was so poor, the movie congruence is so missing, and the story made so little sense at all to even care if any of these running around characters even survive! However, the main point is that I got away from is...I STILL felt cheated by this expensive but very badly made movie -- even though I loved enjoying the movie with my wife and she enjoyed the popcorn...the movie sucked ever so! Save your money. See something twice BEFORE seeing this inconceivable bore.

Last Call (I) (2021)

Provides the ANSWER to, 'Which came First:

[5/10 · 30 March 2021]

The chicken or the egg? (And other bar bets) And what we learn from merely reading these review titles is..: "That there was never a time... when the chicken or the egg were separated!" /// For a sequel pitch? Cast makes fast money with 'Bar Kings', a bar bet that pays big time on a national scale where the wizard gives the mark in the bar himself from hundreds of miles away and all on one magic night'! The title: "Hello, Wizard!" The bar bet franchise game! Rated R.

Coming soon to better stores everywhere: The "Last Call" authentic, movie action figures, of all your favorite characters, so 'real and authentic' and..., just in time for the holidays!

The Brain That Wouldn't Die (1962)

Could TBTWD be the Harbinger to End Times Missing Pieces?

[6/10 · 8 July 2019]

Tacky. Sensuous. Fun and Awkwardly Fascinating. 36-years following TBTWD though, a suspense thriller novel, "Graven Image" portends to uncover an actual, key missing piece of the end times puzzle, suggesting graven images, that are forbidden in the Ten Commandments are something much more devious than we had ever supposed. TBTWD provided perhaps the first glimpse of today's modern bio technocracy and how it may be bio-medically advancing the knowledge in re-reproducing human oracle devices of divination - as anciently forbidden - and fulfilling the calamitous events prophesied to soon occur. Yes. Thought provoking.

They Shall Not Grow Old (II) (2018)

The Wow Factor on Steroids! "WOW!"

[10/10 · 7 June 2019]

What just happened to me? Undoubtedly, TSNGO is director Peter Jackson's greatest, lifetime cinematic achievement, in unprecedented fashion! I am a first generation, child of the television era, right from the very start. I saw much of the first ever, black and white movie video footage taken during WWI many, many times. When Jackson applies his epic, movie making crafting skills and techniques and the screen goes from the old, B&W version, to full cinematic color, Hollywood version, he brings these galant, brave, heroic Americans back to life before our very eyes. Humbling. Emotional. Brilliant - on so many levels. As an aside, I've been reading a book written at about the same time, entitled, "Jesus the Christ" (1915), by James E. Talmage. I didn't read till after I saw TSNGO, which changed everything! As I read the book using Jackson's, brain-awakening experience with our brave WWI soldiers, the same thing happened! I now view Christ's life with the exact, same realism - thanks to Peter Jackson! Both together are truly revelatory. You really must see this extraordinary film.

The Other Woman (2014)

Unfunny, Bad Acting, Template Pap

[4/10 · 1 May 2014]

First, saw it free which was the only saving grace about this movie. I thought it was going to be funny based on the reviews. What I failed to consider was the aptitude of the reviewers! The theater was primarily women that giggled at every stupid nuisance and sounded like the canned laughter from Lavern and Shirley...I think you get my drift. Upton can not act in any form. She danced liked she did in high school and maybe that was the extent of her acting. I suggest, if she does another movie, perhaps she should audition for the remake of a remake of "The Fifty Foot Woman" because that should be a big broad, with an overrated big body, with guys hips, just like Upton has. And the rest of this ridiculous movie was just that, ridiculous! I suggest you go see anything else instead of seeing this. Save your money! If you get in free as I do, then catch a nap. You'll be much,much better off!

This Is the End (2013)

Pap-Rubbish. Pure, Inane Garbage!

[1/10 · 14 June 2013]

Walked out on this garbage. Had no idea real people would stoop this low. Teenybopper, filthy humor that wasn't funny except for the derelicts in the audience. Ridiculous plot, written by those who have no concept of a life here after or what the scriptures say. I'm not caring about anything biblical, this movie was just pure inane pap. I only wish I would've got up and left sooner. I left about the time the devil was banging the short, fat actor. I was offended. I didn't laugh. And if I can save just one person from wasting money on this waste of celluloid, it will have been a very worthy undertaking...that and hoping my '1' score will help drop the '8.1' down lower because I swear, this is not higher than a '2'. Promise! (I just wish too, I hadn't paid for this waste, it wasn't at where I do get in free.)

Spring Reunion (1956)

Spring Reunion Sprung a Leak_And Sunk

[2/10 · 7 March 2013]

There's a reason there is only 4 or 5 reviews of this odd, stupid movie. It's because it's odd and stupid! Is this movie the actual cause of Dana Andrews and Betty Hutton's untimely deaths? I think it could be. This movie was too anal to even know where to begin how useless and worthless it was! Oh, I so pity the people who went the movies in the 50's to see this rot on screen, paying good money to see it. Let's hope the popcorn was good, right. Or at least, they found romance at the movie. Very bad movie. Senseless. Infantile. That is all. It was so bad, having just watched it on TCM, even Robert Osborne didn't say a word about it when it ended! BTW, my wife just said, "How can anyone review a movie from 1941! and Don't you have anything better to do?" LOL. Well, I suppose I could watch the Jodi Arias trial with her, but I already bet her $50.00 that Arias is going to walk! Why? Because any one idiot on a jury, in our diverse walks of life, can hold our justice system hostage and vote her innocent and because we unfaily require a unanimous decision, she is guaranteed to be freed. (It should be majority to find guilty and unanimous for the death penalty or otherwise, life in prison. That is all :~)

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012)

Cash Cow Revisited: Lord Oh Rings 4

[16 December 2012]

What do you get when you have a ton of little gimps running about, always going somewhere and not really ever arriving? Lord of the Rings Four! Oh, and you can bet after an opening weekend of $84 million, there will be plenty more! What's the attraction? I was bored to tears with the first misguided attempts to put the books to screen. All I could see was this...journey. To somewhere. These movies draw an audience, with about a 5th grade intellect and others who are just hungry for any screen entertainment whatsoever or are film enthusiasts like me: They like a dark room away from it all just to enjoy some fresh popcorn (theater yellow salt, no butter.)

The Amazing Spider-Man (2012)

Samo Samo_NBAR!

[4/10 · 5 July 2012]

Nothing But a Remake - NBAR! Maybe it was just me, but since the First Spider Man was still modern; still relevant, on the heels of Toby Macguire and Cliff Robertson, WHY did we have to make the same ol thing over again? What: To see if there was an upside down kiss? C'mon! I expected more. The spoilers are...wait! Only everything you saw in the last one! That's all. The kid gets bit on the back by a spider, albeit digital one; Kid meets girl - falls for girl; Uncle gets shot dead; etc., etc. Couldn't they come up with some creative ideas, enough to write a new flippin' story? Like after several Batman movies, we were treated and rewarded with "Batman Begins"! as a great example. This spider movie version, because of the disappointment of watching the same old plot lines, makes this nothing but a quick spin, with a few new faces and a few changes with story and villain -- this ends up being nothing but a 'cash cow' for the production executives and all y'all have fallen right into their trap. Yes, true. Me too...except I got in free.

Rock of Ages (2012)

It's Fun. It's a Musical. It's Rock & Roll!

[7/10 · 17 June 2012]

Consider the musical "Across the Universe" and how Beatles songs and lyrics were used to build a premise embedded in a love story. "Rock of Ages" takes a similar story line and take some of our most enduring rock songs from the age of vintage rock & roll; rock anthems we know and love to tell us a fun for all frolic of a by gone era. Some of the songs that I didn't really like -- most I did mind you -- add to the story being told and suddenly didn't seem as distasteful as they were when I actually heard them on the radio. Indeed, for the first time, some of the lyrics actually seemed to make sense. I liked it. Cruise takes a dare and succeeds! He could've decided the part was beneath him, after remaking his brand in the last 'MI'. While Julia Hough needs to work on line delivery, the rest of the cast successfully just 'roll with it'. It's predictable and that's okay because it was never meant to be anything more than it is. Just enjoy - don't think. 'Ages' is a fun salute of our rock experiences with some of our trademark rock and roll songs that shaped our upbringing and lives. 'Ages' will settle in over time as a music testament of our coming of age past, our soul and salute to our rocking past. Go see it! Sit back and enjoy!

The Hunger Games (2012)

LAME Games

[4/10 · 25 March 2012]

Teeny bopper haven! Take an idea, dumb it down for teens, include inane plot points and wha laa - you have all the ingredients for a teeny run on the movies. Hunger takes an interesting idea and it isn't long after the whistle sounds, with multiple kids getting killed right out of the starting block, they start banding together in an extremely inexplicable plot point - since all have to die but one - so why are they all buddy-buddying up to the bully of them all? WHY didn't the screenwriters have a bit of originality and having the weakest of those take out the big favorite and thereby create a great twist to the plot? Where was the fear of them losing their own lives around that small group banned together trying to take out Katniss? Just bad. And how do they keep changing the rules nearing the end, when the rules presumably had been the same, as they were instructed in the beginning -- for the past 74-freaken years! They grouped up together reminiscent to the 'Lord of the Flys'. This is an extremely ho-hum plot that will appeal to the high school kids who now will be caught up in the euphoria and the frenzy to see it twice, also picking up those more challenged, out-of-the-loop nerds and emo's from school who didn't go this weekend. I give it 4 out of the kindness of my heart and am so glad I saw it for free!

A Thousand Words (I) (2012)

Good Message_Destroyed in Lousy Movie Presentation

[3/10 · 16 March 2012]

Wow. So stupid. Blowing leaves 'out cho mouth'. Should've blown em' out his...well you get the push back here to such a stupid movie. Nothing wrong with the message - the importance of family really only thing that matters - over money and success, but so completely, painfully, ridiculously demonstrated in a non sensical plot idea and childish, unfunny Murphy-mannerisms that really pushes ones limits in not walking out on this...bad, and I mean pap-bad movie presentation. The ending makes the point about these important things of life, but getting there is about as painful of a movie watching experience that you'll suffer for quite some time. Note too, that I didn't resort to being too cruel here and completely sarcastic, like one might feel as revenge for watching this movie. This movie simply does not deliver.

Jack and Jill (I) (2011)

Jacked to the Hilt! DON"T SEE!

[11 November 2011]

It literally is AWFUL. I don't know, I seem to always confuse Stiler with Sandler, when I don't see one of Sandler's movies for a long time, then pay dearly! I mean payment in waste of time, unfunny skits, fart jokes and generally Sandler doesn't get it. Yea, I know, he continues to make money, but this movie is the worst of the year. Promise! Now, even though I get in free, we were passing time till we'd see "J. Edgar." While we didn't lose money, I got so frustrated because this pap was wasting my time by being so completely unentertaining, I even had difficulty in saying, "Well, at least we didn't have to pay for it!" No, I STILL felt cheated. What a total waste of theater space, not to mention the out of place, stupid cameos at the twins birthday party that falls flat. Go see ANYTHING else!

One Day (2011)

Ridiculous just Ridiculous: One Wasted Day!

[8 September 2011]

Absurd plot. Total Junk. Contrived love. Weak plot to the point of being inane! So, these two people meet on July 15th. Have a so-so relationship at best and all of a sudden, they're best friends deciding to meet on that day every year. Sounds weird, right? What about the other 364 days, over the next 21-bloody years? What about the other day to day relationships, interpersonal situations, struggles, challenges, obstacles that hits those dealings with reality-mortality -- which is all of us? What's the big deal about one lousy kiss on the sidewalk? The one missed opportunity to ball the old lady? (Didn't she say in the movie when they first met, when she graduated that she was 40-years old? If I heard that right, that makes this old broad (and Hathaway in real life) like 60 when she drives the bike out into the street from a blind alley, without looking! Really! Okay, you get it. I give this lousy movie a 2 because I'm feeling generous. At least Hathaway was fully deserving as a candidate for this year's "Darwin Awards" had it been based on a true story, which thankfully, there's no way in 'heck' this could ever possibly happen to any two people that ever existed on this planet. What's worse? I had to actually pay admission to see this pap!

Green Lantern (2011)

Every Bit As BAD as Critics Say! Waay Lame!

[3/10 · 23 June 2011]

Okay, I recognize it's a cartoon. It's Marvel for goodness sakes. But, did you know that when Marvel published the first issue, it had started out as a prank to copy all other super hero's and that while they stole every idea plausible and possible from their competitors, they picked everything that was the exactly opposite to avoid law suits! True! (He's green, Batman Black; Superman Red and Blue...see what I mean?) Now, this movie is rubbish, exacerbated by CGI. And bad CGI at that. Here's a hero that only needs to think of whatever he can to win and what does he think of to defeat the big ol' bad, monster in a cyclops-octipus mode? He sucker punches the thing with a big fist. Duh! Too loud; to childish; too long; pure cinematic pap! Now, Thor wasn't bad and I loved Batman Begins...so I do like this type movie when done well. This sucked. So glad I got in free!

Something Borrowed (2011)

Something Gay* (*Ridiculous)

[2/10 · 9 May 2011]

Follow along with me here...you are sitting through this mess, heading into 2-hours and still you have zero empathy for the characters and all you can do is comment on the lousy acting; the weak personalities and the absurd plot! . In fact, you don't care if boy gets girl, boy loses girl or if boy or girl die in a head on collision. The audience don't care. Granted, the three fat girls that sat behind me, who don't have a social life with the opposite sex thought it funny enough that you couldn't help but hear her stupid laugh. A bad experience all around. And the beach party they go to...they start binge drinking like it's still the 60's and by the time they get to the night spot, they'd be so incoherent drunk they couldn't have walked! Just a poorly designed movie from the start. AND...they had the colossal gull to say instead of "The End" they flashed, "To Be Continued". Please...I pray not! Lousy acting, lousy script, stupid love story and non-sensical movie idea all around.

Hanna (2011)

Inconsistencies, Plot Holes Galore_Gets Ridiculous in Berlin!

[3/10 · 8 April 2011]

Spoilers: See first! First off, what's with these so called expert killers Kate brings into the mix to get the girl? There fat, out of shape and more like clockwork orange hoodlums, that couldn't win a bar fight let alone beat a superior, fighting hybrid! If all the hybrids (for a lack of a better word) had to be 'terminated' and Hanna was the last left, think about this..., here's Kate keeping up with her, in heels! chasing her and Hanna was not able to put distance between them? The point is: If that's all the hybrid can do, WHY does the U.S. have to see her dead? (Obviously, she's not all that bloody superior if that old, British broad is out thinking her! And how do the clockwork orange goons ever find her in Morrocco? Was that the ONLY seedy, little joint in the whole country that the lugs somehow knew that's the one she'd be at? Give me a break.

Why doesn't it reveal whether the British couple and their kids were killed or not? Anyone who can jump onto an undercarriage of a Humvee while traveling over them at speed is frankly, CARTOON! And WHY does Eric, after waiting 13-years in hiding near the Arctic Circle, with a beard and long hair, suddenly cut his hair/have to look...EXACTLY like his file photos, to be instantly recognizable when he leaves the forest? Senseless. And oh BTW, he leaves in suit in sub zero temps. Hello~

What in the world were Kate's gums bleeding for? It has nothing to do with the plot at all! When Eric fights the 3 guys in the vacant space, when the thugs after incredible hesitations, finally do decide to fire their weapon, Eric had time to through one of them into the line of fire and throwing a knife to kill the gunmen. To coin a classic line from Eli Wallach about clowns just like these losers..., "If you're going to shoot...SHOOT. Don't talk!" Great acting by Hanna, for sure!

Unknown (I) (2006)

Unknown, Unimaginable and Unremarkable

[4/10 · 20 February 2011]

Okay, there is some 'action' scenes that make it good for a 2-hour getaway. But c'mon! It's laughable beyond the action when one considers for a moment what it's trying to make us accept or believe.

Such as: --Forgetting the 'brief case' with all the pass ports, information is unfathomable. -- He rushes back to the airport to get it without so much as a hint to the 'wife' that he's doing so. -- What does 'oz' mean everywhere? Another blogger already noticed that. -- Why did the 'wife' go into the suite to onhook the bomb because her face still would've been recorded when they were there 3 months prior anyway! -- And why didn't she break the wall out further to get to the bomb deactivate system, rather than reaching down blindly down through the wall and blowing herself up anyway? -- Why did the hardened, East German spy readily eat cyanide just because that old rogue showed up at his apartment? Why'd he give in so soon, when he could've killed him as a trespasser or robber? -- Why was it that the only two people catching a train was Liam and the other hit dude? -- Save your money and go see instead: Barney's Version.

How Do You Know (2010)

Poster Child Template For Inane Script Writing

[1/10 · 31 December 2010]

Great cast. Woefully abhorrent script. Badly acted. This thing was nothing but bad. Really. The audience, as small as it was for a Thursday night, at least sat through the thing up until we left, having endured a full hour of this, somehow hoping it would make sense; allow us to grow empathy for the characters; give a care for any of their situations...but it never happened. We didn't care she was cut from a ball team! We didn't care the male ball player screwed anything that moved. And we didn't care or fully understand the corporation thing and Nickelson's involvement. This pap was nothing more than a mega star, cash cow pay check. $100M to make this!! No wonder the industry has no decent middle ground of movies and is replete with remakes/sequels and very little imagination. BTW, by the time we walked out, the coach who said he was coming over, after saying he only emails the team selections...never did. This movie epitimizes what happens when a movie is heavy loaded with star power with a script written over the weekend by some poor a** clown, born into the business without talent or skill and lends strength to considering the argument: Have we reached the point where we should stop presenting movies in theaters all together? This movie begs that question. Finally, armed with an annual free pass card, my one bit of satisfaction was that I didn't pay for this and help perpetuate star salaries without receiving an expected deliverable in the form of a real movie script.

Fair Game (I) (2010)

Political Folly_Liberal Attempt to Distort and Confound_Underhanded Penn Diatribe

[5/10 · 7 December 2010]

Okay, we know Penn's a good buddy of the Venez. dictator Hugo Chavez. Would we expect anything fair and balanced from this unAmerican? Of course not. And that's exactly what we get. A movie hell bent on attempting to prove Iraq didn't have WMD's. Of course! they had WMD's! They used the chemical ones on their own people, killing over 5,000 of em. Frankly, it wouldn't have mattered if they didn't have any with such a corrupt, evil, murdering dictator as they had in Hussein! If our guys would've only found a pack of firecrackers...they were justified in the unified invasion...agreed to by the Dem's AND Repubs as well as the international coalition! So please, let's quit, once and for all in blaming Bush and Cheney for something that was agreed to by our entire government, albeit a few and I mean few exceptions. And the only real thing we can blame on Cheney (excepting Hallieburton) is that he's a lousy shot!