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Reviews
Alien: Covenant (2017)
When It Comes To SciFi/Horror...
...there arent many films, if any, that would top the ALIEN franchise. Personally, ALIENS is a flawless film from start to finish. Colonial Marines... can you get anymore badass than Vasquez and Drake?!
I found myself not caring much for PROMETHEUS. It had a few redeeming scenes that i enjoyed but was disappointing, especially considering how long and how much I had been waiting to see it.
On to ALIEN: COVENANT - I enjoyed it very much. It was definitely a step-up from its predecessor. It has plenty of moments that lifelong fans of the ALIEN franchise will love and appreciate. The last scene, to me, was so disturbing that I had to walk outside to get some fresh air. SPOILERS - it occurs in and around a Hypersleep Chamber. It may not bs terrifying to most - but when i imagine myself in the same situation, i get chills. The bad kind.
Billy Crudup is awesome as usual and I wish he was in the film longer. And of course, the always amazing Michael Fassbender is great as David.
In closing, watch the movie and enjoy the ending!
Road House (1989)
Road House - and its only infraction...
Its almost blasphemous to to talk bad about a Patrick Swayze film - even Next of Kin. Road House, as most would consider, is one of his best. Personally, I have a bone to pick. Its only fault, in my opinion, are the actions of Dalton's love interest, Doc, played by Kelly Lynch. She knows how he feels about violence. She knows first hand how evil and conniving Brad Wesley and his minions are. Yet, when Dalton decides he wants to do something about it, she faults him for it. Soon after, Dalton is attacked and nearly killed by Wesley's gun-wielding second-in-command. This fight ends with the legendary throat-ripping scene. Then, as a wounded and bleeding Dalton turns to face the Doc, clearly bothered by what he was forced to do, she runs straight past him, to check out the dead or dying bad guy. After realizing he was far beyond saving, she looks at Dalton, turns away in disgust and leaves him standing there alone, wounded and bleeding. And that, folks, is my biggest problem with this film. SPOILER ALERT!!! - The rest of the film takes place with Dalton and the Doc ending up together - happy and in love. I say SCREW THAT! She knew how great a guy he was and how he respected and was attempting to defend the good people of Jasper - the Doc and her Uncle included. Still, she disrespected the man and turned her back on him when he needed her most. I loathe the instances when films do this. She didn't deserve his forgiveness. Dalton should've kicked her ass to the curb - not literally, as we "Swayze Crazy" folks know he doesn't hit or kick the ladies - and ended up with Carrie, the waitress at the Double Deuce, played by the always awesome Kathleen Wilhoite. In my opinion, she's more attractive anyways.
So, that is my only complaint - misplaced devotion and a lack of loyalty, respect and appreciation. Shame on you, Doc! And shame on the writers who scripted it that way. Other than that, GREAT FILM!
No One Will Save You (2023)
Out Of This World!...but in it!
I've been waiting for a film like this for quite some time. I love films involving aliens - especially those of "the Greys" variety. To me, growing up with the belief that "real aliens" are like the Greys, it makes films like this more believable and more terrifying! Yes, i love other movies in the alien/extraterrestrial/sci-fi genre - but most of them portray aliens in a more monstrous, more hideous, violent beast form. That's ok, too. But this is the film I've hoped for for years. There have been several films in the past 20+ years (Alien Abduction: Incident In Lake County, Extraterrestrial, etc...) - but "No One Will Save You" blows them out of the water - or out of the sky.
Imagine if you'd gotten to see more of the aliens in "Signs". Imagine if you'd exhausted every hiding spot and finally had to make the decision to square off with the earth-invading creatures. Like "Home Alone" but instead of Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern, you get hunted by tall, skinny, creepy things... and while that description still fits him, you wont find Marv in this one.
The ending is a bit different than I expected - and weird, to be honest - still, I like it. It fits the sad backstory that is weaved throughout the film and definitely adds some depth of emotion to it all. Kaitlyn Dever as "Brynn" is a truly great, underrated and underappreciated actress and she is awesome, as usual, in NO ONE CAN SAVE YOU.
In the end, I'm left wondering... did Brynn save herself - or did the aliens save Brynn?
Taken (2008)
Taken. Let 'em have her!
This movie was huge when it came out. It began Liam Neeson's re-rise to action hero fame. It has some truly epic scenes of violence - all in the name of revenge and saving his daughter. Though I'm usually a Famke Jansen fan, the short amount of screen-time she's given in this film are enough to make me despise the character she plays. Same thing with the daughter. We often sit back and imagine ourselves in the situations we see on screen - and that's just what I did for part of TAKEN. I would probably make a horrible parent - because if my ex-wife and daughter approached me and lied to me about the details of my underage daughter's trip overseas the way they did ol' Liam, I'd have to bid them farewell. Good riddance. But that's just me.
Brightburn (2019)
BRIGHTBURN Burns HOT!
I absolutely love this film. Imagine Superman as a child - a pre-teen - then imagine him turning evil and waging war against puberty and everyone on Earth. That's what makes it so enthralling.
If you've seen the film Chronicle, this will be right up your alley. BB is definitely more brutal, with a R-rating - Chronicle was PG-13 - and the violence and gore is done superbly - not over the top. One thing that makes a horror/sci-fi film stand out to me is the absence of a "happy ending". Growing up favoring slasher films, I tend to appreciate and root for the bad guy. I could easily see myself becoming the bad guy, if I discovered the truth about myself and became aware of my powers, all whilst going through puberty. The revenge on school bullies...rebelling against the parents that can do absolutely nothing to stop you.
I would truly love to see a sequel to BRIGHTBURN. I feel it opens up a whole new world of superhero/super-villain possibilities. I doubt it will happen, as I don't think the movie performed very well financially, which is truly sad. Most folks I talk about it to have never even heard of it. Still, I would love to see Brandon Breyer continue to "take the world" in BRIGHTBURN 2.
Watch it. Trust me.
Adrenalin: Fear the Rush (1996)
Way Underrated and Not Appreciated
I saw this film for the first time when I was 12. It always stuck with me. Growing up, I loved to play Mortal Kombat and my favorite character was "Baraka". For some reason, the killer in Adrenaline: Fear the Rush, reminded me of Baraka.
Anytime I've asked someone about this movie, they've never seen or heard of it. In my opinion, it is grossly underrated. It's got action, sci-fi, horror... all the ingredients for my favorite kind of film.
Do yourself a favor and give this movie a chance. Christopher Lambert and Natasha Henstridge definitely have some not so wonderful films on their résumé but this is not one of them.
Law Abiding Citizen (2009)
3 Bad Guys!
Great movie. One thing stands out - the character Jamie Foxx plays is as big a monster as the 2 antagonists that start the movie off. Cutting a deal to keep his conviction rate. He's irredeemable. Shame. Shame. Shame. His actions justify all the horrible things that rain down on his friends, his family and his self.
The film makes a point of showing the repercussions of his egotistical work ethic but in the end, he's the good guy. To me, it cuts too deep. He deserves as horrible an ending as "Darby" and "Ames", however, he walks out of the fire unscathed. I would've loved for it to end differently. Still - pretty damn good movie!
Black Bird (2022)
Black Birds Matter!
Being a Taron Egerton fan, I knew I didn't want to miss this show. Right from the start, I was hooked. Paul Walter Hauser continues to amaze me as an actor. And Greg Kinnear is great as usual.
Great acting and a great script really bring you into the story and boy, does it get tense at times! Films with similar story lines have been made over the past 30 decades but Black Bird puts up a solid fight to claim a place near the top of the list.
I have but one complaint! ***SPOILER ALERT*** - as in many other films set in a prison somewhere, there's always at least ONE sadistic asshat guard. With the leverage that comes with Jimmy's (Taron Egerton) situation in prison - the reason he's there - I couldn't believe that the show ended without us getting to see the guard jumped, maimed, slaughtered or at the very least...FIRED!! But no. We get no such thing. Shame on you AppleTV!
The Bob's Burgers Movie (2022)
Bullshart
I was about 20 minutes in when I quit watching this. I love Bobs Burgers, but to learn they replaced Pamela Adlon because there was an "issue with a white actor voicing a black character" and that Jimmy Presto has no lines and is completely silent because the actor who's always voiced him was at the Capitol protests on Jan 6.
Folks! You're a freakin cartoon about stupid, funny things surrounding a freakin burger restaurant. Do what you do best and leave the attempts at letting everyone know just how woke you are to our politicians. I'm disgusted. Disappointed. Bobs Burgers has lost a fan. Toodles.
The food wasn't that good anyways.
Lords of Chaos (2018)
Great\Awful
The 100% truth is that 2 posers who sucked at writing music got into a pissing contest to see which one "fart the loudest" - meant as a euphemism for trying to prove who had the biggest dick. The answer? Neither. At least we got a good movie out of it.
P O S E R S and amateurs.
But it's a GREAT movie based on AWFUL music. Never understood why people listen to that crap. Talentless musicians find a crowd, I suppose. But the true story is interesting - tho the film does stray from reality quite a bit, supposedly. Still, great acting, great score, great film.
And regardless of truth vs. Hollywood - I must take this opportunity to say that all the real folks involved were the true definition of absolute posers. Posers. Posers. Posers. Their music wasn't good enough to get them the attention they felt they deserved - so they chose crime. Posers.
The Package (2018)
Surprisingly Hilarious!
This film surprised the hell out of me. It is genuinely hilarious. There are tons of scenes that you'll be laughing and talking about for weeks...especially the Terminator nod. Eduardo Franco has got to be one of the best young, up and coming comedic actors around right now. You may recognize him from season 4 of STRANGER THINGS - where he pretty much plays the same sort of character as he does in the Package. I imagine he's fairly easily type-casted into that type of role - but damn! He's great at it. All the actors are great in this film but he's definitely the show.
Check it out - you'll be glad you did. 👍🏻 - "Reverse Terminator!!!"
Black Bird: We Are Coming, Father Abraham (2022)
Do NOT Blacklist "Black Bird"
2 episodes in and I'm hooked! Great story - phenomenal actors - brilliant acting. Before viewing, my expectations were fairly neutral. The synopsis and trailers got me curious but I figured I would watch and think it deserved 5 stars at most - a very "middle of the road" sort of show. Thankfully, I was wrong. I sure hope the remaining 4 episodes are as addictive as the first 2.
Marrowbone (2017)
Don't Leave It Alone
Great movie. Great story. Great actors. Great acting.
This movie really gets you caring for the characters. Even for Tom, who is generally unlikeable - you feel bad for him at times.
The main thing about this film - it's different. It had a heart - albeit a broken heart at times. I love it. You probably will too.
The Wolf of Snow Hollow (2020)
What A Surprise!
Jim Cummings is a absolutely brilliant writer, director and actor. I'm still upset he didn't have a bigger role in Halloween Kills.
As for this film - 10/10. It has perfect amounts of comedy, drama and horror. I actually wished I was in Snow Hollow - it was almost atmospheric. This was the first time I've seen any of Jim's work and as soon as the film was over, I was hooked.
The creature and gore effects are great. The acting is great. The story is great. And the ending, it's great too! As a addict with close to 10 years sobriety behind me, I really appreciated the addiction aspect.
Brilliant all around. I can't wait for more from this guy!
Absentia (2011)
A Fairly Awesome Surprise
Honestly, my expectations were never too high for this film. A description of the plot was unable to grab me. So, I watched it anyway.
ABSENTIA is a slow-burn but manages to keep your attention and curiosity. The score/soundtrack definitely facilitates that.
The ending, I would say, is in the vein of Stephen King's THE MIST (film) - I absolutely adore the ending of each.
Also, A+ for originality.
MOST DEFINITELY WATCH!!!
Greenland (2020)
The Kid Killed It For Me
I'm watching this movie and enjoying it. Then I get to about the 30 minute mark and the kid does something SOOOOOOO INCREDIBLY STUPID that I immediately get super irritated about the fact that it's impossible for me to jump through my television and into this film so I can smack the crap out of the kid and toss him into the junk luggage pile with his little blanket.
You will know exactly what I'm talking about when you see it. Actually, I am so bothered by this child character's actions that I may not even finish the movie.
Mad God (2021)
It's Not Mad, It's Just Disappointed
Well, I just finished "Mad God" 10 minutes ago. From then, until now, I've had my simple review in my head.
"Um..." and "Uh".
And that about sums it up.
Field Freak (2016)
Alrighty then...
I somewhat enjoy Bigfoot movies - even though most are absolutely heinous. FIELD FREAK is no exception.
It's a boring, over-used storyline - and it has some of the worst acting I've ever seen in my life.
Oddly, I couldn't tear myself away. I actually wanted to keep watching. Maybe I'm just out of it today.
The Bigfoot costume is hilarious and horrible.
Watch at your own risk.
Training Day (2001)
Training Day without Macy Gray
I love this movie. Great movie. There is only one complaint I have always had since the first time I saw this film. Macy Gray - the well known singer - is obviously not a full-time actress but her performance was awful. Bleh.
The Signal (2007)
A MUST!
I redboxed this film and it blew way past all of my expectations. Not to be confused with the disappointing 2014 film 'The Signal' starring Laurence Fishburne - this is one of the most underrated films I've ever seen.
It also introduced me to who would become my favorite actor - AJ Bowen (You're Next, House of the Devil and the amazing A Horrible Way To Die).
To the easily distracted - make yourself stay focused on this one because different storylines overlap and interact and you definitely don't want to miss a thing.
Now, go watch it!
The Retreat (2020)
Great surprise!
Creature features are my absolute favorite type of horror films. So, I only have 2 complaints about this film.
1. The creature fx aren't that great - but still a pretty cool looking monster.
2. When the main character fires a rifle, the sound effects used are so bad that it's comical.
Other than those, I was truly pleasantly surprised with this film. I came across while scrolling through Prime.
The acting is great. The setting is awesome and the story is too.
There are several psychological twists throughout, so pay attention! I usually don't care for that but in 'The Retreat', I think it allows the viewer to decide which twist is the one that's real.
Super impressed with THE RETREAT! Watch it!
Santa Clarita Diet (2017)
Wow and WTF
Never has the canceling of a show vexed me so much.
Timothy Olyphant is a God. This show was such a great dark comedy. If you've not seen it, binge it. Compared to most of the BS "original" shows on Netflix, SCD was a shining beacon in a world full of darkness surrounding the tv and not finding anything decent to watch.
Watch. Now.