mblotd Reviews

Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens (2015)

Disappointed

[7/10 · 18 December 2015]

This? This is what Disney jettisoned Michael Arndt and Lucas's story treatments for? So they could do a retread of EP 4? With elements of EP 5 and 6 thrown in? Nearly every single scene harked back to the original trilogy like one big exercise in fan service. It was exactly what I feared it would be after watching all the trailers and TV spots. I was hoping for something new, and not yet ANOTHER Death Star. Holy god, couldn't they come up with something different? I thought Abrams and Kasdan said they had worked really hard on coming up with a good story. Doesn't take that much hard work to reboot A New Hope.

I left the theater with a heavy heart. Really disappointing. There was a lot of potential for something great, but instead I felt Prometheused. A lot of big questions, some really interesting moments, but almost no payoff. Who was the old guy in the beginning? Why were there Star Destroyers and AT-AT walkers buried on Jakku? And what the hell did Mark Hamill have to get in shape for? So he could stand on a cliff in a robe looking at the water for 30 seconds?

Now I'm curious to know what Lucas's original story was. People like to beat up on the prequels, and they certainly leave a lot to be desired, but they had their moments. And despite their flaws, they still felt like Star Wars. The Force Awakens, on the other hand... felt a little hollow and soulless. It needed George Lucas's touch. He's a great ideas man and has quite an imagination, but IMO his Star Wars films fared better when he came up with the story and someone else wrote and directed. But it is what it is. I will say that I think EP 7 planted the seeds for a great EP 8, and with Rian Johnson at the helm of that one I feel a little more confident in him than with JJ.

EuroTrip (2004)

Missed potential

[3/10 · 3 February 2007]

I think they really missed the boat on this one. What started with what I thought were some good ideas (cold shouldering a pen pal he thought was a guy and is really a hot girl) and could have been a cute or charming comedy, instead ended barely a few steps above s*** like Not Another Teen Movie, American Pie, etc. I found some real belly laughs here and there, even at things that were just completely wrong. But they lost it for me with things like the constant nudity and the sex in the confessional. And whatever happened to subtlety? It's not easy to miss any of the gags, because most of them smack you in the face.

It not hard to see why some people wish "death to America" and want to wipe us off the earth, when crap like this is exported all over the globe. And it's sad to see that this it what passes for humor nowadays, and how unfortunate that every "comedy" keeps trying to top the last one by inserting more penises, breasts, gross-out gags, toilet humor, and overall lameness.

Left Behind: The Movie (2000)

Eh

[4/10 · 2 February 2007]

I didn't agree with any of the theology in the Left Behind series, but nonetheless I found the books gripping and I read 8 of 12 of them. Undeniably good writing and interesting story. However, I didn't have very high expectations for the movie. There was no way mainstream Hollywood would have taken up a Christian series and produced a big-budget movie. So it was done independently... and it just felt like I was watching a really long TV show. It just didn't FEEL like a movie; it didn't have that movie "experience" to it, if anybody knows what I'm talking about. So the movie suffered because of that, and the low-budget, poor special effects were another detraction for me.

On top of that, I feel that Gordon Currie was woefully miscast as Nicolie Carpathia. Reading the book, my impression of NC was that he was supposed to be this charming, dazzling, amazingly handsome guy who spoke English with almost zero trace of an accent. So I imagined somebody like Pierce Brosnan in the role. Instead, they found some Clay Aiken pencil-neck who looks like an employee of the month from Best Buy, and gave him a really bad fake accent. So that lost a few stars for me right there. A movie is just not convincing when the major villain doesn't look or sound the way he's supposed to.

The acting was okay, but nothing to write home about. Some of the scenes - like one of the conversion scenes (can't remember which one) - were real seat-squirmers for me. And some of the Christian rock music or whatever it was, was really out of place for some of the scenes, like in the one with Kirk Cameron praying in the bathroom.

In short, it wasn't a bad movie, but it just didn't do it for me. Stick to the book, folks, it's much better.

Jersey Girl (2004)

I loved it

[8/10 · 6 December 2006]

I find ironic that people who enjoyed Kevin Smith's other movies hated this one. That right there pretty much explains most of the haters (i.e. those recommending Mallrats and JSB over this). I thoroughly enjoyed this movie and I was laughing my ass during most of it. I am obviously not an actor, but I didn't find any problems with the acting or the dialogue. It sounded real and believable. Sure, there may moments that are corny or make you want to wince, but every movie has moments like that. Raquel Castro and Liv Tyler really stole the show, George Carlin had just the right pizzaz as a crusty old Pop, and some of us can relate to Ben Affleck's character.