nufc_geordie Reviews

Atlas (2024)

I really wanted to like this movie!

[2/10 · 24 May 2024]

Firstly, Jlo isn't the problem with this movie. Any actor that had to deal with this script would struggle to make it work. Secondly, I really wanted to like this movie so Im sad I have to write this review.

Atlas is a B movie that has such a bad plot that I really can't reconcile the money that must've been spent making it. I've seen a lot of Sci-Fi movies and I can honestly say every scene in Atlas is plagiarized. There's a bit of Enders Game, large slices of Alien, Aliens, Alien Prometheus, RoboCop, and Starship Troopers. There are whole lines of dialog I recognized from Ex Machina, MadMax, M3gan.... and anyone who has seen Morgan from 2016, well OMG!

Despite all that Atlas is no better than a bad episode of Love, Death & Robots. Infact gi and watch that instead!

Gattaca (1997)

Dated (2024).

[4/10 · 14 May 2024]

Gattica appears on a lot of top 10 Sci-Fi movie lists and wondering what all the fuss is about I finally watched it.

In the "not-too-distant" future, eugenics is common. A genetic registry database uses biometrics to classify those so created as "valids" while those conceived naturally and more susceptible to genetic disorders are known as "in-valids". Genetic discrimination is illegal, but in practice genotype profiling is used to identify valids to qualify for professional employment while in-valids are relegated to menial jobs.

I can see why this movie was so revered back in the day, but not so much now. It doesn't hold up to a lot of scrutiny 27 years on. Small things like the use of keyboards, fashion and the general esthetic make this look and feel like an old movie. The plot and acting are very good, in the same way they are in "Citizen Kane" but I wouldn't want to watch it now.

Maybe 20 years ago Gattica warranted a 9 or 10 but it just isn't that good in 2024.

Significant Other (2022)

Very Imaginative!

[8/10 · 12 May 2024]

Please pay no attention to the negative reviews. Some movies need a bit of effort from the viewer. If you let this movie just wash over you and don't pay attention, you'll miss all the important signs as to what its really about.

The acting is great and both main characters are outstanding at showing emotion. The way it is filmed also helps with a variety of visual cues. At times this movie can be eerie, and emotive but behind all that is a reality good insight into human nature and the things that effect our feelings for each other.

There are no typically Hollywood tropes here and it's all the better for it.

Young Ones (2014)

Bleak, but entertaining!

[8/10 · 10 May 2024]

Its not post-apocalyptic, theres just a serious lack of water. Ernest Holm (Michael Shannon) tries to protect his family from the rising problems. He must also defeat his daughter's boyfriend Flem, who wants to take over his land.

I liked this movie a lot, but I nearly didn't watch it after reading the reviews. It is a bit slow to get going but the groundwork done in the first half is essential to the excellent second half.

The acting is very good, especially Michael Shannon. However, Nicholas Holt was a poor choice to play the "bad guy". He just lacks gravitas.

My one big issue I had was with the sound, sometimes the dialog is difficult to understand, and I found myself looking for subtitles.

Jurassic World Dominion (2022)

They just get worse!

[4/10 · 24 April 2024]

Jurassic Park was a genuine 10/10 movie. It had everything and was watchable to all ages and tastes. The second and third were pretty good two but I'd read the books by then so they had a lot to live up to.... and didn't quite manage it.

Jurassic World was a good concept but they missed the opportunity to make it worthy of the franchise. Too much CGI and not much character.

Since then they seem to be riding it for all they can. Trouble us you can't ride a dead horse. The new characters are shallow despite being top actors, the old characters are a hard sell for me. Theres no wow factor and no real storytelling in this latest installment. I found myself being very easily distracted while trying to watch this and that says it all.

My Son (I) (2021)

Disappointing!

[2/10 · 5 April 2024]

McAvoy and Foy are outstanding actors and the reasons I gave 2 stars.

The first 30 minutes are engaging enough but from then on its very disappointing.

The realization that the entire film is just one badly executed red herring after another made me feel robbed at the end.

Several plotlines are opened up but none are followed through on. At the end there are so many unanswered questions it just seems like they ran out of budget and decided to use what they had left to film an abrupt closing scene.

The Scottish scenery is amazing and I can't complain about the production values or any of the technical aspects of the movie.

My advice, don't bother!

Road House (2024)

Worse Than I Thought!

[2/10 · 2 April 2024]

Jake Gyllenhaal is excellent in the role of Dalton. That's the only good thing I can say about this "reimagining" of RoadHouse.

I'm going to be entirely predictable now and say McGregor can't act, but it's actually worse than that because he's a complete clown in this movie. I don't know if that's the writing or the direction but either way it's the final coffin nail.

Other stuff that's bad is the lack of any backstory for any of the other characters. None of the scary bad guys are scary. The local sheriff and all his deputies are neither convincing or competent, to call them Muppets would be an understatement.

Jessica Williams and Daniela Melchior are wasted with no more than a couple of scenes each, and maybe this is a personal thing, but the music sucks too.

Not even a good try!

Spaceman (I) (2024)

Not a Sci-Fi movie!

[4/10 · 8 March 2024]

Sandler is out of his comfort zone here but he manages to do a decent job. (I thought he was amazing in Uncut Gems). Carey Mulligan is just wasted, all that talent and the director seems to be unable to tap into it.

None of mechanisms are relevant. In my opinion, this movie could have been set anywhere.

The philosophical messages are forced down you throat, especially near the end of the movie and I had to try really hard not to disconnect and pick up my phone.

Not a Sci-Fi movie, not an Adam Sandler classic and not worth watching unless you're looking for an emotionally taxing, arthouse movie about love, loneliness and relationships.

The Old Man (2022– )

Superb!

[10/10 · 31 January 2024]

I sat down to watch something to pass an hour or so and binged the whole thing. I haven't done that since 24! Jeff Bridges is acting royalty and proves it yet again as "The Old Man". However, this entire cast is brilliant. There's so much intricate dialog in this series, and it's delivered at the perfect pace, with gravitas and such intensity that I was just hooked. The characters are so easy to root for regardless of their loyalties. It has its fair share of action too, which is done in an exciting way but it's also grounded and believable. The storyline is well thought out and is told in the past, with the use of flashbacks, and in the present, which is difficult to do and not look like lazy storytelling. If you like CIA/FBI dramas this is one of the best I've seen.

Dear Child (2023)

You will be disappointed!

[2/10 · 10 January 2024]

It's promising at the start, and it does have that "just one more episode" quality about it. However, after investing five hours in the story it rewards you with a damp squib at the end.

The acting is reasonably good except for Hannah, the young girl that glues the first five episodes together and the Grandfather who is just weird.

There are so many plot holes and loose ends, most of which could've been forgiven if the conclusion wasn't so awful.

I also thought the dubbing and sound quality was a distraction.

I don't know what else I can say without giving spoilers away. I would just like viewers to know before starting to watch that you will be disappointed at the end, and don't waste 6 hours of your life!

Meg 2: The Trench (2023)

So bad, it's funny!

[1/10 · 22 December 2023]

I don't know what I was thinking paying to see this movie. The first Meg was bad but at least it gave the sense of awe and jeopardy. This latest installment is beyond silly. It is unintentionally hilarious in places and the CGI is awesome, but somewhat overused.

Jason Statham and Cliff Curtis are playing the "good guys" roles with too much intensity and complete lack of situational awareness. It's like they really think they're in an awesome monster movie like Godzilla or Cloverfield. The rest of the cast are OK for the most part, although they haven't done their careers any service. It's basically a B movie made with modern technology.

Mayfair Witches (2023– )

Thumbs up!

[10/10 · 4 December 2023]

It seems to me fans of the books don't appreciate this show. I haven't read the books so I'm coming at this without any preconceptions. Its all about the characters' backstories, in the first two episodes, and theres a lot to take in. Episode 3 really gets the show going, and its brilliant from there onwards. Alexandra Daddario, carries the show as Rowan. She conveys so much fragility and I could feel her need for answers. She really makes this character someone you can care about and root for. One line of dialog "I don't want to be transformed, I just wanna be me" sums up a lot of her frustration. The rest of the cast do a good enough job but there is a lot of window dressing here.

The lighting is atmospheric and there are some excellent cinematic moments. The only criticism I have is the Scottish accents, they're dreadful!

The Killer (2023)

Nearly a Ten!

[8/10 · 16 November 2023]

This isn't one of Finchers best, nor is it one of Fassbenders but it's very close. The negative reviews are bizarre to me. I think too many people expected a Jason Statham type shoot em up!

I was impressed that this movie wasn't in a hurry and played out at a pace I found absorbing. It also didn't spoon feed me the plot, which too many movies do these days.

This is a psychological ride, a movie that makes you think about the sheer unpredictable nature of life. Whatever job you do, however much you plan and how good you are at it, sometimes things go wrong and you either cry about it or you put it right.

The visuals are great, the humour is well timed, soundtrack is perfect and the story has a beginning, a middle and an end. A very satisfying 2 hours of escapism.

The Unthinkable (2018)

Strange!

[4/10 · 11 November 2023]

What a strange little movie this is. I recognized about six films in this movie. It's a disjointed story that reminds me of the "found footage" genre. The beginning is slow, sentimental and with minimal dialog. The characters are very downbeat and not at all likeable. The second half is better with more of a flow about it but I wasn't really invested in any of the characters at all. It's worth a watch simply because it's so unique. However I don't think disaster and sentimentality are good bedfellows unless the people involved are worth routing for. Fir example: Greenland, which is very similar but much more enjoyable.

Play Dead (2022)

Not the right movie!

[4/10 · 30 October 2023]

I started watching this under the impression it was rated 18+ and was a hardcore horror movie! That's how it was advertised on Prime. When I checked on imdb I realized it had been mislabeled, and what I actually got was an implausible crime drama. As it turned out it wasn't as bad as I expected. It has its share of plot holes and bad acting but the lead actors were quite good and the suspense and jeopardy are there, in small doses. I wouldn't have watched this if I'd known the storyline, and I wouldn't recommend it but I watched it all and found it entertaining enough. This isn't the first time Prime have made this error so just check you're getting the movie you want.

Dark (2017–2020)

Misery!

[2/10 · 22 October 2023]

Please don't believe the hype. I started watching DARK because of the reviews on here (imdb) and I feel like I've been the victim of a cruel joke. How anyone can give this show anything higher than a 2 star rating is beyond me. Firstly the acting is appalling. It's like casting got the cheapest drama school dropouts to reduce the budget. Secondly, the aesthetic is miserable. If I didn't know better Id think Germany had no seasons, just cold, wet, dank, drab winters. Thirdly, the characters (though badly acted) are unrelatable and unlikable. There's nobody to root for or invest in. I really didn't care who lived or died. Lastly, the whole confusing time element which weaves the story together is purposely over complex. It's like the writer started writing without a beginning, middle and end so had to complicate the story to make it feel more cerebral. It's just nonsense. I've watched the entire first season and it was a relief when it ended, I real couldn't torture myself any further. I recommend Travelers, Timeless and Stranger Things!

The Only Living Boy in New York (2017)

What a waste!

[2/10 · 14 September 2023]

It's difficult to watch such an amazing cast be wasted like this. Every single character in this movie is unlikeable in the same way as a stranger at a house party who is intent on stealing the limelight. The dialog is verbose, ostentatious and utterly pretentious. The writing is typically "coming-of-age" based in a world of cocktail parties and first world problems. Nobody talks like this, nobody lives like this and nobody should want to. I just found myself rolling my eyes way too much to care by the time it got to the very predictable conclusion. It is advised as witty and sharp but believe me, it's more like lackluster and monotonous!

Painkiller (2023)

Emotional!

[9/10 · 13 August 2023]

Before watching this show I had very little understanding of the pharmaceutical industry and little to no knowledge of Oxycontin. It was obvious after the first episode that the US have a very different approach to prescription drugs. These factors piqued my interest and I started my steep learning curve.

I'm not sure why I kept watching, maybe I was entertained or maybe just morbidly curious? I have to say, it isn't fun and I don't recommend it. It's a dark, cruel emotional ride that I still can't get out if my head.

Aruba, Broderick and Kitsch are shockingly good actors and they provide the entertainment factor. The script, score and direction and ok and the supporting cast do an admirable job.

An emotional ride you won't want to get off.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023)

Almost Perfect!

[10/10 · 8 August 2023]

GotG3 is the perfect mix of action, comedy, drama and Sci-Fi. It's also compelling emotionally however bizarre that maybe.

Of all the movies in the MCU, the Guardians trilogy stands out for me because every installment has something the others don't, and that's heart. The cast is outstanding especially Chris Pratt as Peter Quill, and Dave Batista who is just brilliant in everything I've seen him do.

This 3rd installment, as everything in the MCU, has a ridiculous story and a lot of CGI but the true story behind all that is one of friendships, which we can all relate to. It does have a killer soundtrack and lots of laughs, which always helps. Highly recommended!

Bird Box: Barcelona (2023)

Disappointing!

[2/10 · 21 July 2023]

I gave this movie 2 stars for the cast. It's nowhere near as impressive as the first BirdBox cast but they do a decent job.

That's where the positives end.

This movie is described as Horror, Thriller, Sci-Fi! Its none of those things.

There's no excitement, and after the first 15 minutes, no jeopardy either. I was hoping for some insight into the "Creatures" but nope, nothing. Then there's the "Survivors" who are too dumb to have survived so long. Inevitably it has all the religious tropes we've all seen before, copy/paste misguided zealots.

The dialog is verbose without actually saying anything and the mix of languages, poor dubbing and inaccurate subtitles are a distraction.

It's not a sequel but a vehicle to launch a franchise.

Don't Worry Darling (I) (2022)

High hopes!

[2/10 · 23 June 2023]

There is one thing that this movie does very well, it looks amazing. All the actors are easy on the eyes, the 50s costumes and cars are fantastic.

It's all down hill from there. Florence Pugh carries the whole movie. She is convincingly manic, paranoid and angry as her character demands as always.

Pine and Styles seem like they're going through the motions and seem like they're just waiting for someone to shout "cut" so they can get out of there.

The script is unoriginal and the story telling is dull, dull, dull! The so-called twist or reveal isn't worth waiting for and isn't something we haven't seen a dozen times before!

Black Mirror: Joan Is Awful (2023) Season 6, Episode 1

Best Season Yet!

[10/10 · 19 June 2023]

I've just finished watching Season 6 of Black Mirror and it's the best season yet. Joan is Awful is the pick of the bunch but Demon 79 and Loch Henry are awesome too. Netflix have a lot of rubbish on but shows like this make it worth the subscription in my opinion.

Joan is Awful is excellent in every way. Its funny, disturbing and timely. The scary side of AI summed up in one episode. The cast is brilliant too, as in all episodes of this season. There isn't a lot more to say without venturing into spoiler territory so take my advice and watch it. There's something for everyone in this season of BM so enjoy.

Simulant (2023)

Dull and Unoriginal!

[2/10 · 9 June 2023]

I was really looking forward to this movie after watching the trailer. Unfortunately it's not the film I was hoping for.

There's nothing original here. It's the same old tropes and recycled storyline we've all seen countless times before.

The acting isn't great but I don't think that's down to the cast. It's just dull and uninteresting.

I'd like to point out some positives but I can't. I found the whole thing underwhelming and I struggled to get to the end. When compared to movies like Blade Runner, AI and Ex Machina I can't justify giving this anything more than 2 stars. Very disappointing!

Landscapers (2021)

Too much artistic license!

[2/10 · 4 June 2023]

Looked at in the cold light of day, this is a horrendous story of abusive relationships, deceit and murder. So why it is told in an absurdly comic manner is beyond my comprehension.

As a crime drama miniseries this story could have been much more engaging and interesting without the "dark comedy" and artistic license.

I was very disappointed with the portrayal of the main characters which was off-putting and distracting. The detectives are played like characters from a Monty Python sketch and the lead detective, DCI Collier (Daniel Rigby) as a foul mouthed, verbally abusive clown with anger issues!

The best part of each episode is the actual newsreel footage shown over the ending credits.

The Mother (2023)

Copy/Paste

[4/10 · 25 May 2023]

There's nothing original here, just the same old caper we've all seen countless times before. Its not JLo at fault, she is 50+ and doing an action movie, while looking amazing throughout, so I gotta give kudos for that. The problem is with the writing and dialog, its dreadful and the characters are very stereotypical FBI/Gangster types with all the usual tropes.

The story is like a mish-mash of nearly ideas but nothing unique that stands out. This is essentially an action-hero movie and there are so many better than this, even with a female lead. KATE with Mary Elizabeth Winstead or AVA with Jessica Chastain are two that spring to mind!