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Reviews
Everything Everywhere All at Once (2022)
So, So Bad
Parallel universes, flaccid plotting, over long, poor acting, jokes that don't land, and massive hype. There is so much to dislike about this film. At some point, when all the noise around award nominations and wins has died down, people will step back and take a cooler analytic look at this film and recognise it for what it is: ill structured nonsense. Yeoh, Quan, Hsu, Curtis.etc. Can't be blamed for the mess for they are just fitting into that the director/writers have constructed. Watch the trailer, and if you have even the slightest reservations, don't subject yourself to the whole 2hr 19m debacle. Stupidly I didn't follow my instinct and let someone persuade me to watch this. Oh, but the regret. This film is so, so bad.
Amsterdam (2022)
Confused
I'll avoid giving anything away but just say there's an important contemporary story immersed in this period story but this gets buried under an overly involved and ultimately uninteresting tale. Clearly lots of names thought it wise to sign up for performing in this mess but it's lost on me why anyone thought the screwball tone and noirish plotting was necessary. Its easy to see that with some good script editing, the film could have come in 30mins shorter and still achieve what it does. Digging down to the core historical circumstances revealed in the story, there's plenty of material to make a riveting and quite different film.
Mass (2021)
Should Be Moving But It Isn't
Two mature couples meet to cathartically talk through a trauma they've experienced. On paper, this should be moving, but it isn't. While the four main actors do a good job, the script is so massively over written it lands like a dead weight. Just when you thought it was all over, in the last two minutes before the credits roll the sound lifts everything to a new level of over blown ridiculousness. I watched the whole 1hr and 50mins but it was an ordeal, and not the emotional ordeal that was being aimed for. The film has a serious subject matter but it deserves a less sanctimonious treatment.
Adrift in Soho (2019)
The film, not Soho, is adrift
I wanted to like this film, but it didn't take long until it became clear it's simply awful.
First, there is little attempt to create any sense of 1950s periodicity. Some token gestures are made with costumes (apparently, nearly everyone in the 1950s always wore long overcoats) but these are confused, for in some cases, character stylings look more 60s (e.g., documentarian Jo's three-quarter length raincoat and black tights).
Second, for a film so defined by place, it fails of evoke the look of Soho. While I can understand it could be expensive to get the permits for shooting in central London, repeatedly using the Lace Market in Nottingham is not a passable substitute. Towards the end of the film, a couple of moments are particularly anomalous. When James and Harry appear on the banks of the Thames, you can see the skyscrapers of a very modern London behind them. Ok, it isn't necessary to achieve 100% veracity, and so placing The French House on the corner on Old Compton Street can be forgiven (its actually on the southern end of Dean Street). Still, given the establishment's history (meeting place for the French resistance in WW2 etc.), placing ITALIAN flags on the outside signage (green-white-red instead of blue-white-red) is just bizarre!
Third, as other commentators have noted, the acting is just dreadful. There are many performances to dislike here but Chris Wellington as James Compton-Street is probably the least convincing. In the actors' defence, they are burdened by an unactable script that tries to be poetry at times, and occasionally throws in snippets from Comte de Lautréamont. Weird that a film that appears to want to celebrate film should fall back on that old cliché of believing literature, particularly poetry, are higher forms of expression. They are not. Linking back to the first point here, casting choices are also incongruous, with most of the ensemble looking entirely like early 21st century twenty somethings. It wouldn't have taken much, but a few haircuts might have helped create some period plausibility.
Finally, allusions to cinéma verité, Free Cinema, and Dziga Vertov (i.e., eye poster on a wall) appear gratuitous given the film's fumbling artifice.
Having worked in animated film production in Soho during the 80s, I know the place well, but you really don't need any real-world reference to know this is a bad movie.
The Public Image Is Rotten (2017)
Like the band, great beginning but weaker in the later stages
Like the band itself, the film is great in its early stages but loses its way later. Public Image Limited were magnificent until Wobble left but then went down hill and it was all over after the 'Flowers of Romance' album and Levine's departure. It is maybe inevitable therefore that in tracing PiL old and new, the film itself peters out once we get beyond those landmarks. Still, worth a watch for the archival footage, including stuff from the first performance in Belgium and the Xmas 1978 dates at the Rainbow.
The Tender Bar (2021)
Dull and (Visually) Dark
So dull, for there is no story here, and the relationships just aren't enough to sustain the film.
Any why is it so dark to look at? At many points the picture is so clouded its impossible to make out the details of faces. I was alive in the 1970s and don't recall that a dimmer switch had been turned down on the world.
Starting with 'Confessions of a Dangerous Mind' and 'Good Night, and Good Luck', Clooney's had some high points with his directing, but now with ever film he makes, he just seems to be taking a backwards step.
One to miss.
1917 (2019)
Pretty Ordinary with Stylistic Gimmick
Mendes has just won the Directors Guild of America top award but I can't see why. This is a pretty ordinary WW1 drama. telling a noble story, but with an unnecessary stylistic gimmick. A lot has been said about the long take shot but these add nothing to the drama and in fact make the film look like playing a video game, partly because of the tendency to have the narrative divided into staging posts (e.g. the farmhouse, ruined town, etc.). Some lines in the script are achingly bad and at times the acting is poor. Deakins photography however is excellent as ever and not certainly because of the long takes.
It Chapter Two (2019)
Worst Sequel Ever
If you loved the first 'It', avoid this inadequate sequel. The main premise - the kids all grown up and still confronting their fears - just doesn't work. None of the grown ups is interesting and we got the idea about excising fears in the first film. Then there is the length. Who ever thought this film needed a 'climax' that is an hour long? Chucking in a couple of cameos from known faces can't save things. It is because the first film was so good and this one so bad that I think its the worst sequel I've ever seen.
Killing Eve: Do You Know How to Dispose of a Body? (2019)
What a mess
After the brilliance of the first series, this second series is such a mess. First few episodes get things going ok but by the end everything is crawling to the finishing line. Jodie Comer remains astonishing but even she can't save this. Who thought this was good drama? All the key characters are wasted. As anyone who has made films knows, if a scene doesn't work, compensate with some great music, yet here the sounds of Unloved end up over used to the point of boredom. I hear a third series has got the greenlight but I really don't care.
Selling Sunset (2019)
We need more property, less about the relationships
Missed opportunity. Could have been a great show about LA property with some stuff in the background about the lives of the women realtors. Instead its all about a truly annoying team bunch of female realtors going on about theirs lives, who just occasionally wander through a house. Who cares if the French pastry chef wants babies or not, or if the husband lives in Miami? Oh, and who selected the music? Hideous. Sack the show now.
High Flying Bird (2019)
A Soderbergh Failure
Soderbergh arguably remains one of the most exciting fim-makers working today but this film is a complete failure. Quick-fire duologues, densely packed with opaque lines, shot with static camerawork does not make for an engaging story or film. A general problem is that this is one of those films about American sports that forgets the rest of the world have no idea what you are talking about nor do they care. In these times, this myopic, insular focus on US-centric concerns inadvertently ends up being an expression of 'America First' thinking. Please, no more movies about the business of sports that no one outside the US has the slightest interest in. The world is a bigger place.
Phantom Thread (2017)
Beautiful looking film about an utterly loathsome character
A great looking film that is not a great film. This is the story of an utterly loathsome man that is dressed up, literally dressed up, in the trappings of art. Look beyond those trappings and it's a pretty empty story. We should never let questions of plausibility get in the way of deciding whether a film is worthwhile or not but here one does have to ask if anyone (i.e. Alma (Krieps)), regardless of their long term motives, would willingly spend any time with someone so detestable as Reynolds (Day Lewis). As other reviewers have noted, the pacing is plodding and considering the story told, the film could easily have been 30mins shorter without losing anything. Still, with the stylish garments and elegant interiors of the Bloomsbury townhouse, the film is beautiful to look at. Also, Jonny Greenwood's music works well. So, this is a perfectly enjoyable movie, and after Anderson's last effort 'Inherent Vice,' that is really saying something. But let's not pretend this is anything more.
Blade Runner 2049 (2017)
Worst Film of 2017
Just when I thought 'mother!' was going to be the worst film of 2017, along comes 'Bladerunner 2049'. This is boring, ponderous, pretentious nonsense that can only impress anyone without a discriminating, critical faculty. Only saving graces are Roger Deakins' photography (which is astonishing), the sound, and Harrison Ford's performance. So ssssslllllllooooowwww. So meaningless. Like any thought provoking film, you are left with questions. Why can't anyone walk at a normal pace in this film? Is the great narrative 'secret' really secret, or important? How can I get those 2.5hrs back in my life? Despite this rubbish, I continue to think Denis Villeneuve is one of the best directing talents around. Let's hope he can recover his form with his next movie.
Damsels in Distress (2011)
Awful, simply awful
Damsels in Distress is awful for so many reasons but principally for a comedy script that isn't funny and multiple lousy performances.
Greta Gerwig of course attracts something of a loyal following but she again turns in her usual irritating performance. While it could be pleaded the character of Violet is intended to be infuriating, and so the performance is intentionally irritating, as Gerwig gives exactly the same performance in every film she makes, we can only conclude the performer is to blame. Others around her (e.g. Analeigh Tipton as Lily, or Ryan Metcalf as Frank) do a reasonable job with the poor material, although Megalyn Echikunwoke as Rose cannot be forgiven for giving one of the worst performances ever on film. And just when you thought things could not get any worse, the film closes with two really bad dance sequences that kill stone dead any message about the wonders of dance which the film has tried to spin.
Awful, simply awful.
The Tree of Life (2011)
Awful
Awful, awful, awful, awful, awful and awful. The only way any discriminating critic could describe this film. There are those who will be lured into believing this is a work of art but ......... they are wrong! Don't be conned by the pretty photos, the religious rumblings of the narration, and the spiritual music. Exercise some real critical judgment instead and actually consider what is going on on screen. Is there really two paths through life - the path of nature and the path of grace? Come on, this is just a lot of incoherent, mystificatory, religious nonsense. 'Badlands' and 'Days of Heaven' were great but it was clear by 'The Thin Red Line' that Malick had lost it. Watch this film at your peril!