noa_dk Reviews

The Creature Wasn't Nice (1981)

I give up - this is the worst ever!

[13 August 2002]

Dont get me wrong - i like bad movies - i like them a lot! - So i asked my 'pusher' to bring me a special treat - after all we have been enjoying titles like 'Slavegirls from beyond infinity' and other quality camp productions... - but THIS...

I laughed - a lot even, but that was more in amazement than because of the humorous content - maybe because there is none. Its like the director have deliberately purged the film of all content that could be considered humorous.

The scenes are dragged out like someone with a stopwatch was telling the actors to 'hang in there - this scene is 10 minutes in the script...'. The big hoot: the-singing-alien-scene is - although mildly amusing in the beginning - so long that the actors have serious trouble keeping the puzzled look, and actually started looking seriously bored halfway through the act.

So take the friendly advice of everyone but one of these fine critics - Do NOT watch this film - not even if you have a strong stomach.

Battlefield Earth (2000)

What a ride!!

[1/10 · 22 July 2002]

I think I must have gone through every emotional stage during this one - nausea, boredom, disbelief, anger, joy and sheer pleasure... I had to watch it alone, as no one in their right mind would think of accompanying me.

I normally pride myself of having exceptionally bad taste in films, so this one was a clearcut challenge and I have bought my copy of it secondhand - wonder why anyone would part with such a gem... During the first Apeplanet-half of the film I did start to question my ability to absorb a cinematastic experience of this magnitude, and I had to take several breaks as I searched the IMDB for advice on how to stand the pain. But with a few of the more humorous comments in mind I ventured on into the second half. To my great surprise and pleasure, Battlefield Earth now evolved form its dull apeplanet remake form - over a MadMax/Army of Darkness inspired 'well-fight-them-with-science' where all of the human-animals suddenly develop an evolved way of thinking, plotting and gesturing - all in a matter of days - very fascinating. The last part of this - dare I say - Epic, is nothing short of an ID4 clone, and I can seriously recommend that you force yourself to see this part through - its very rewarding.

Conclusion: Yes its bad!! - one of the worst actually... No the plot is no better than your average 50's scifi film. Yes John Travolta deserves his hard earned raspberry award for worst actor.

But all in all this is a must for your next bad taste movie night!