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Reviews
Revenge of the Empire of the Apes (2023)
Oops, I wasn't paying attention.
I was just kind of going through the motions to watch a movie and I wasn't paying attention. I actually thought it was going to be the new Planet of the Apes movie. It took about 30 seconds to realize my mistake, again, not paying much attention. Then I thought I had possibly gotten a p0rn0 so I thought it wasn't going to be all bad. It was all bad let me tell you. I quickly realized it was not going to be a p0rn0 because p0rn0's have much better acting. I went back and looked at the cover for the movie which I had not paid any attention to. The cover is definitely an indication of how bad this movie is. There are no spoilers in this review because there is nothing to spoil. I have reached my minimum so I'm done. Bye.
Expedition Unknown (2015)
Narcoleptic
All I can say is this show is Narcoleptic. I don't even know if that is a word. Yup, just looked it up with an non-invasive search engine that doesn't start with a G.
I don't know if it's Josh Gates' cheesy vest, that stupid hat, or the unfashionable Shemagh scarf he wears but I cannot stay awake more than 5 minutes into this show. It gives me Narcolepsy. I have had a good 8 hour sleep and began to watch this show and fallen asleep 5 minutes later.
Gates seems like a nice enough guy so I hate to dump all over his show. It is interesting even though he never finds anything he is looking for. If he does find a trinket or picture frame there is lots of speculation that it could have been possessed and/or used by the deceased person or gang responsible for the capers he is trying to solve.
But, I still watch it over and over until I finally get to the end without falling asleep. It's entertaining and worth a watch.
The Last Victim (2021)
I've seen much worse.
Not a terrible flick. I actually would have given it 5 out of 10 stars if it didn't have Ron "the D'Bag" Perlman's tow headed ignorant face in it. He calls
Deputy Gaboon a racial slur the entire movie, well, most of it (hehe). I thought he was supposed to be 'woke'. Guess he's just a big hypocrite.
The first 90% of the movie was pretty slow and the last 10% was weird, but I've seen much worse. The worst part was she replaced her very dependable Toyota FJ with an Audi wagon, which is a rolling pile of junk (I'll put that down as a spoiler alert.)